As a legal professional, there are so many things that you can’t control. Especially how your client might act or what they’ll say. No matter how intelligent, talented, charismatic, and capable you are, you can’t plan for every situation. But if you’re lucky, it’s the other side’s client that will mess up, instead of yours.
Lawyers spilled the tea online about the most epic, bizarre, and surprising fails they have ever witnessed in the courtroom and outside of it. We’ve collected the most intriguing stories about people messing up to show you how unpredictable this job can be.
#1
This was in a custody dispute, jury trial. We represented the father of young twins, and the mother wanted child support. The issue was that, for the past three years, they had been sharing the kids EXACTLY 50-50, as in he got a weekend, she got a weekend, one of them got Monday Tuesday, the other got Thursday Friday, and they split Wednesday. There was no reason not to have a shared custody order with each parent paying their own expenses, but she thought she could get more, so there we were.
The thing was, she did not have a case. She kept taking the kids to CPS and child psychologists before the trial to make a reason why she should have primary custody, but we managed to get all of that excluded.
So on the day of the trial, her big argument is that these kids have asthma. Severe asthma. The kind of asthma that requires special equipment, and the father is ignoring these issues. He's negligent. He's endangering them. She should have custody.
The trial is generally going our way. She's not a great witness, she doesn't have any medical records to back up these allegations, and we have the children's daycare teacher testifying that she doesn't know anything about any special equipment or severe asthma. But the moment that sealed the deal came when the mother called her last witness.
The last witness to testify was the children's grandmother, the mother's mother. The jury already knew that she frequently babysat the two kids, and that her apartment was often a drop-off location for the kids. The mother swore that the grandmother never smoked in front of the kids, and that her apartment was not a dangerous environment for asthmatic children. The grandmother was called last minute by the mother as a rebuttal witness.
As she took the stand, the grandmother leaned over into the microphone and cleared her throat.
"Ahecchhhmm."
It was a two or three second long expression of smoky phlegm. I don't recall exactly what the grandmother said in her testimony, but I remember she sounded like decades of three-pack-a-day smoking when she said it.
After a half-hour of deliberations, the jury awarded primary custody to the father. He immediately started crying, while the mother sat motionless. It was a good result.
The thing was, she did not have a case. She kept taking the kids to CPS and child psychologists before the trial to make a reason why she should have primary custody, but we managed to get all of that excluded.
So on the day of the trial, her big argument is that these kids have asthma. Severe asthma. The kind of asthma that requires special equipment, and the father is ignoring these issues. He's negligent. He's endangering them. She should have custody.
The trial is generally going our way. She's not a great witness, she doesn't have any medical records to back up these allegations, and we have the children's daycare teacher testifying that she doesn't know anything about any special equipment or severe asthma. But the moment that sealed the deal came when the mother called her last witness.
The last witness to testify was the children's grandmother, the mother's mother. The jury already knew that she frequently babysat the two kids, and that her apartment was often a drop-off location for the kids. The mother swore that the grandmother never smoked in front of the kids, and that her apartment was not a dangerous environment for asthmatic children. The grandmother was called last minute by the mother as a rebuttal witness.
As she took the stand, the grandmother leaned over into the microphone and cleared her throat.
"Ahecchhhmm."
It was a two or three second long expression of smoky phlegm. I don't recall exactly what the grandmother said in her testimony, but I remember she sounded like decades of three-pack-a-day smoking when she said it.
After a half-hour of deliberations, the jury awarded primary custody to the father. He immediately started crying, while the mother sat motionless. It was a good result.
9points
#2
Not a lawyer, but a law student. This was in a case that my professor showed us in class.
Some guy was accused of something, I cannot remember what, but the judge spoke him free because there wasn’t enough evidence he had done it. Guy said “thank you judge, I’ll never do it again”.
DA appealed and got him convicted.
Some guy was accused of something, I cannot remember what, but the judge spoke him free because there wasn’t enough evidence he had done it. Guy said “thank you judge, I’ll never do it again”.
DA appealed and got him convicted.
8points
#3
I’m an attorney and a foster parent, and my wife won’t sit next to me when we have to go to court for our kids because I usually have a running commentary on how inept the attorneys are. The judge for this type of case knows me and knows I’m an attorney so he finds this entertaining.
Last time we went in pre-covid, there was one attorney, who is my FAVORITE, in the case before us. (She’s also an attorney in one of our matters and the social workers, myself, the judge and every other attorney hate her in these matters because she oblivious, loud, and incompetent.)
So she stands up in this case and goes “your honor, my client has only been found guilty of child endangerment in (county next to us) and (county next to that). I see no reason that this court should hold that against him when it comes to custody of his children.”
The long suffering judge, “attorney oblivious, why did your client move to this county?”
“Because he hoped CYS here wouldn’t intervene in his idea of discipline! I don’t think that just because one county objected to him locking kids away from food and using a switch on them, we should automatically assume he is a bad parent!! What about the love he has for these kids?”
All three kids were under four years old.
Last time we went in pre-covid, there was one attorney, who is my FAVORITE, in the case before us. (She’s also an attorney in one of our matters and the social workers, myself, the judge and every other attorney hate her in these matters because she oblivious, loud, and incompetent.)
So she stands up in this case and goes “your honor, my client has only been found guilty of child endangerment in (county next to us) and (county next to that). I see no reason that this court should hold that against him when it comes to custody of his children.”
The long suffering judge, “attorney oblivious, why did your client move to this county?”
“Because he hoped CYS here wouldn’t intervene in his idea of discipline! I don’t think that just because one county objected to him locking kids away from food and using a switch on them, we should automatically assume he is a bad parent!! What about the love he has for these kids?”
All three kids were under four years old.
8points
A good lawyer will do everything they can to protect their client’s interests. Well, that works only so long as the client themself is willing to prioritize their own interests as well. There needs to be a proper match between a real expert and a client who is willing to trust their expertise.
According to ‘Best Lawyers,’ quality professionals will have plenty of experience, relevant specialization, clear communication skills, and a transparent fee structure.
Furthermore, they will provide realistic guidance, have verified credentials, strong client reviews, and a client-first mindset.
“The best lawyers show genuine empathy and actively listen to your concerns. They treat you as a collaborative partner in your case, not just another file number. They respect your time, are prepared for meetings and understand the stress legal issues can cause.”
#4
I'm a paralegal, although I'm in IT now, but previously I was in other areas.
Well in court, the case before ours at the time was for theft and was going on much longer than it should have, Defense lawyer calls for a motion to dismiss, claiming lack of evidence. Judge says he will entertain said motion after lunch, hits gavel says court will reconvene at 1 pm, court dismissed. Defendant stands up and says real loudly, " Told you i could get away with stealing that."
He thought his case had been dismissed.
Well in court, the case before ours at the time was for theft and was going on much longer than it should have, Defense lawyer calls for a motion to dismiss, claiming lack of evidence. Judge says he will entertain said motion after lunch, hits gavel says court will reconvene at 1 pm, court dismissed. Defendant stands up and says real loudly, " Told you i could get away with stealing that."
He thought his case had been dismissed.
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8points
#5
A doctor testifying under oath that he deliberately chose not to inform a pregnant woman of a positive test result for a really severe genetic disorder, because he figured because she was a member of his church she wouldn't have considered aborting the pregnancy under any circumstances.
A primary care doctor who received a complex and technical test report from a genetics lab, and simply forwarded it to the patient (who didn't really speak English and wasn't medically educated). She testified that she "performed the minimum required diligence" which is not what you should say and expect a good outcome.
A primary care doctor who received a complex and technical test report from a genetics lab, and simply forwarded it to the patient (who didn't really speak English and wasn't medically educated). She testified that she "performed the minimum required diligence" which is not what you should say and expect a good outcome.
7points
#6
I've told this story before but I might as well put it here. This guy wanted custody over his children after a divorce and his wife was accusing of [physical harm]. He was asked if he had ever [harmed] his wife and he straight up said 'Yes, but only when she annoyed me' or something along the lines of that. I was ready to straight up leave the court room and laugh.
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7points
CEB explains that there are a few common groups of problematic and difficult clients:
- Micromanagers who question your every decision and want to be included in the process
- Emergency clients who treat every development as a crisis
- Bargain hunters who keep questioning your fees and comparing you to other attorneys
- Overly emotional clients who require professional boundaries and focus on legal issues to actually help them
Obviously, it can get emotionally exhausting when you have to manage clients, especially difficult ones. As a legal professional, it’s important that you handle your emotional responses to their behavior professionally.
#7
My client was charged with aggravated [attack] (5 years possible) for kicking [the hell] out a guy while wearing cowboy boots with those fancy steel ornamental tips on the boots. He wore the boots to his jury trial.
7points
#8
Unfortunately my best story for this is from my own client. We had a client who was on the board of directors for a company, and was being sued for allegedly not telling the board something. His part of the case was really only a smaller part of a larger and more complicated case, so while there were a lot of other issues in the case overall, the entire case against him specifically essentially boiled down to whether or not he told the board about X.
I and few other attorneys spent an entire week — 9 AM to 5 PM or later, Monday through Friday — prepping this client for his deposition by going over every document in the case with him and explaining why it was important. On several occasions we reiterated that no matter what else happened in the case, as long as we can show that he told the board about X, he was fine.
The day of the deposition arrives. Opposing counsel sits down and starts questioning our client. In the first 5-10 minutes of the dep, opposing counsel straight-up asks our client what he told the board. Client responds, “I told them about Y, I told them about Z, I told them about A, B, and C” — and says NOTHING about X, literally the only issue in the case against him.
In 20+ years of practice it was the closest I’ve ever come to rage-quitting on a client.
I and few other attorneys spent an entire week — 9 AM to 5 PM or later, Monday through Friday — prepping this client for his deposition by going over every document in the case with him and explaining why it was important. On several occasions we reiterated that no matter what else happened in the case, as long as we can show that he told the board about X, he was fine.
The day of the deposition arrives. Opposing counsel sits down and starts questioning our client. In the first 5-10 minutes of the dep, opposing counsel straight-up asks our client what he told the board. Client responds, “I told them about Y, I told them about Z, I told them about A, B, and C” — and says NOTHING about X, literally the only issue in the case against him.
In 20+ years of practice it was the closest I’ve ever come to rage-quitting on a client.
6points
#9
Had a bylaw officer harass me almost constantly for 8-months for violating a by-law: I had parked my motorcycle in my driveway. He ordered me to remove it, and tried to levy fines for the violation. He went after my landlord and tried to get me evicted.
Eventually, I got a lawyer and filed a complaint. When asked to point to the bylaw I was breaking, he did and even read it out, which basically read:
No parking or storing anything in a driveway other than an automobile.
He seriously thought a motorcycle wasn't an automobile because an automobile is a car. When I hired my lawyer, and showed him the case, he said "I'm not taking new clients right now, but I'll make an exception because I'm personally offended that this is happening to you."
Everything was thrown out, and I'm currently working on getting my legal fees and extra payments for all the harassment.
Eventually, I got a lawyer and filed a complaint. When asked to point to the bylaw I was breaking, he did and even read it out, which basically read:
No parking or storing anything in a driveway other than an automobile.
He seriously thought a motorcycle wasn't an automobile because an automobile is a car. When I hired my lawyer, and showed him the case, he said "I'm not taking new clients right now, but I'll make an exception because I'm personally offended that this is happening to you."
Everything was thrown out, and I'm currently working on getting my legal fees and extra payments for all the harassment.
Report
6points
“Develop strategies for staying calm during difficult conversations. Take breaks when needed, practice active listening, and remember that client emotions usually aren’t personal attacks on you. Having colleagues you can vent to (while respecting confidentiality rules) helps process frustrating interactions,” CEB suggests.
“Set boundaries that protect your personal time and mental health. You don’t need to be available 24/7 for non-emergency matters, and clients generally respect reasonable limits when they’re clearly communicated.”
One thing to keep in mind at all times is that you cannot solve all of your client’s problems. Empathy goes a long way, but you are not responsible for their stress. What you can(and should) do instead is focus on the legal issues that you’ve trained to tackle.
#10
Not a lawyer, but I have a similar type of experience to share.
Where I live, municipal zoning rights are controlled by a board that has a nickname of "The Green Taliban" - so named because they are heart-attack serious about anything to do with environmental regulations (I live in one of the most left-wing, environmentally-conscious areas of the country). Their answer to anything that isn't 100% in compliance with the most stringent environmental codes is almost always "No."
Anyways, this millionaire decides to move out to the area and buys an acreage. His plans for developing the land include creating an artificial cave (for wine-tasting parties) by blasting one into a cliff using mining explosives and creating a new stream by draining a water-body located on the property.
Needless to say, these actions were rather controversial amongst the community and he had to have a public hearing (which I attended) in front of the zoning board to explain himself. After a couple of pointed questions from the board, he loudly groused, "You know, where I come from [a very conservative part of the country, as it turns out], if we want to build a road and there's a lake in the way, we move the lake."
That was about the point where I thought to myself, Yeah, you definitely just lost your case. Congratulations on passing into local legend, though.
Where I live, municipal zoning rights are controlled by a board that has a nickname of "The Green Taliban" - so named because they are heart-attack serious about anything to do with environmental regulations (I live in one of the most left-wing, environmentally-conscious areas of the country). Their answer to anything that isn't 100% in compliance with the most stringent environmental codes is almost always "No."
Anyways, this millionaire decides to move out to the area and buys an acreage. His plans for developing the land include creating an artificial cave (for wine-tasting parties) by blasting one into a cliff using mining explosives and creating a new stream by draining a water-body located on the property.
Needless to say, these actions were rather controversial amongst the community and he had to have a public hearing (which I attended) in front of the zoning board to explain himself. After a couple of pointed questions from the board, he loudly groused, "You know, where I come from [a very conservative part of the country, as it turns out], if we want to build a road and there's a lake in the way, we move the lake."
That was about the point where I thought to myself, Yeah, you definitely just lost your case. Congratulations on passing into local legend, though.
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6points
#11
When my client filed a restraining order against his ex and then asked me to leverage the restraining order just so he could get back with her. In our state, if you do this, you’ll have to pay the other person's attorneys fees.
4points
#12
We all forget to turn off our phones in court, but I once faced off against a lawyer whose phone rang right while he was in the middle of making his final submission to the Judge.
Even that might have been forgivable if he hadn't interrupted his submissions to take the call.
Even that might have been forgivable if he hadn't interrupted his submissions to take the call.
4points
If you’ve worked as a legal pro or ever found yourself in the courtroom, what are the weirdest and most memorable moments you’ve witnessed?
Have you ever hired a lawyer before? If so, what qualities did you look for? How can you tell that you can truly trust someone?
Grab a drink or snack (or both!) and join the discussion in the comments at the bottom of this post.
#13
Late to the party, but I'll chime in anyway. My firm had been chasing down this woman for years, trying to get her to pay out on a six figure judgment. She kept nothing in her personal bank accounts and used the money for her business accounts for a rather lavish lifestyle. She kept claiming she was broke and that she didn't use her company funds for her living expenses, including in affidavits filed with the court. During the citation deposition, at the beginning, she stated she was current on her mortgage for her huge house. We go through all her finances and companies and after a few hours I brought up the mortgage again and then asked "if you're broke, but current on your mortgage, how are you making mortgage payments?" Silence, then in a soft voice "I use company funds." Her attorney stopped the deposition and pulled her out of the conference room. My boss was observing and started laughing and told me it was a good question.
4points
#14
I work for an attorney whose client wanted custody of his kids. At that time the mom was claiming that he was an unfit parent and that he drank and partied too much. Trial wraps up and an officer comes in an puts the dad in handcuffs, much to all of our surprise. Apparently the guy had an outstanding warrant for a DUI. He didn’t win custody.
4points
#15
Gas station chain had one of their stations gas tanks leak and pollute a church playground. They tried to say they weren't liable because the pollution didn't start seeping up through the ground until years after it happened.
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4points
#16
My client gave a textbook perfect confession to a robbery the police had no leads on.
He had walked into the police station and told the front desk that he thought the cops were looking for him. He then volunteered that he and a friend robbed a gas station last week. Then, after police arrested and warned him (right to silence etc), and after he spoke at length with counsel (not me)...he repeated his confession in an audio/video statement. He wasn't forced or coerced. He hadn't been detained for an unreasonable time in cells first. They hadn't even interrogated him. But as a result of his confession, they were able to get a DNA warrant and matched him to blood swabbed at the scene.
And the best part? The police had no idea beforehand that it was him. My client and his friend had covered part of their faces, the surveillance video was horrible quality, and they had bear sprayed the store clerk (a 16 year old kid) immediately upon entering so the kid hadn't been able to provide the police with as description beyond "two males." And since he had no criminal record, he wasn't in the DNA database from previous crimes. He had just heard a rumour that police were investigating, and assumed they knew it was him.
I had to laugh when I got the police report and read all of this. I then focused on securing him as fair plea deal because he had no chance at an acquittal.
He had walked into the police station and told the front desk that he thought the cops were looking for him. He then volunteered that he and a friend robbed a gas station last week. Then, after police arrested and warned him (right to silence etc), and after he spoke at length with counsel (not me)...he repeated his confession in an audio/video statement. He wasn't forced or coerced. He hadn't been detained for an unreasonable time in cells first. They hadn't even interrogated him. But as a result of his confession, they were able to get a DNA warrant and matched him to blood swabbed at the scene.
And the best part? The police had no idea beforehand that it was him. My client and his friend had covered part of their faces, the surveillance video was horrible quality, and they had bear sprayed the store clerk (a 16 year old kid) immediately upon entering so the kid hadn't been able to provide the police with as description beyond "two males." And since he had no criminal record, he wasn't in the DNA database from previous crimes. He had just heard a rumour that police were investigating, and assumed they knew it was him.
I had to laugh when I got the police report and read all of this. I then focused on securing him as fair plea deal because he had no chance at an acquittal.
4points
#17
I had a family client whose ex wasn’t letting him see his kid. So we were in court with him explaining how important parenting was to him, how much he loved being a father, etc.
After 45 minutes of this the mother says ‘I don’t know why he’s saying this, he abandoned his other kids’. Cue me who has never heard him mention having other kids. Turned out, yeah, 100% abandoned them, has had no contact for years, never made any efforts.
Please give your lawyers important information especially if another party involved knows your secrets.
After 45 minutes of this the mother says ‘I don’t know why he’s saying this, he abandoned his other kids’. Cue me who has never heard him mention having other kids. Turned out, yeah, 100% abandoned them, has had no contact for years, never made any efforts.
Please give your lawyers important information especially if another party involved knows your secrets.
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4points
#18
I have posted this here before. I'm not a lawyer, I read about this:
Two guys were being tried for robbing a gas station. A customer who saw the robbery was now on the witness stand. The prosecutor asked him to describe what he saw. The witness said that he saw two guys robbing the store and while running out, one of them bumped into him. Then the prosecutor turned towards the two defendants and asked "Are those two men in the court room today?"
At which point, the two idiots raised their hands.
I'm sure the defense lawyer thought "How the [hell] am I supposed to defend you now?"
Two guys were being tried for robbing a gas station. A customer who saw the robbery was now on the witness stand. The prosecutor asked him to describe what he saw. The witness said that he saw two guys robbing the store and while running out, one of them bumped into him. Then the prosecutor turned towards the two defendants and asked "Are those two men in the court room today?"
At which point, the two idiots raised their hands.
I'm sure the defense lawyer thought "How the [hell] am I supposed to defend you now?"
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4points
#20
Not a lawyer, recent law school grad studying for the bar. This happened summer after my first year of law school, I was making a court appearance as a student attorney (basically, a rule in my state that lets students practice under attorney supervision).
I was working with the public defender’s office, representing a client at a first appearance on a probation violation/bail hearing. On a probation violation, the judge is allowed to hold a defendant without bail (keep them in jail until the case is over).
Client says he has some money, but not much. Could get together about $500 for bail. Ok, I’ll ask the judge to keep it low or just release him. Prosecutor asks for $300 bail. Great, my work here is done. Whatever I say, judge will order $300 or less and my guy is out.
I say my piece, and then my client interrupts the judge, saying some incoherent stuff about how he needs to get out and he’s got this that and the other thing going on. Won’t let the judge speak.
Judge holds him without bail even though the prosecutor didn’t ask for it. All he had to do was shut up and he’d have gone home that afternoon.
I was working with the public defender’s office, representing a client at a first appearance on a probation violation/bail hearing. On a probation violation, the judge is allowed to hold a defendant without bail (keep them in jail until the case is over).
Client says he has some money, but not much. Could get together about $500 for bail. Ok, I’ll ask the judge to keep it low or just release him. Prosecutor asks for $300 bail. Great, my work here is done. Whatever I say, judge will order $300 or less and my guy is out.
I say my piece, and then my client interrupts the judge, saying some incoherent stuff about how he needs to get out and he’s got this that and the other thing going on. Won’t let the judge speak.
Judge holds him without bail even though the prosecutor didn’t ask for it. All he had to do was shut up and he’d have gone home that afternoon.
3points
