When people are budgeting their weddings, the main aspect that the price depends mostly on is how many guests you are inviting as this is how the size of the wedding is determined. If you want a small wedding, that means that you have to carefully think over your guest list, which can lead to various disagreements.
This woman specifically wanted only people she knew to come and when her husband’s friend brought a plus one she didn’t recognize, she asked her to leave. The thing is that the husband’s friend left as well and that upset the woman’s husband, who found out only a day later.
More info: Reddit
Woman was planning a small wedding so when she saw someone who she didn't want to be there, she kicked her out
Image credits: David J (not the actual photo)
The Original Poster (OP) got married just a few weeks ago and one incident that happened at her wedding is still bothering her husband, even though she doesn’t think she did anything wrong.
The incident involves her husband’s friend. This friend didn’t live near the couple, so they met very rarely, which meant that they didn’t know his girlfriend that well and this was a problem to the bride, who wanted the plus one to be a spouse or a person she was familiar with as she was planning a small wedding.
The woman got married a few weeks ago and she allowed a plus one if it was a spouse or a significant other she and her husband knew well
Image credits: u/rspvthrpw
The woman’s husband managed to convince her to allow the friend a plus one as he was traveling to their wedding and he didn’t know anyone else there, so bringing his girlfriend would keep him company.
Turns out, the friend broke up with his girlfriend a few days before the wedding, but he still came; however, he brought another woman who the bride didn’t recognize, so she asked her to leave. The bride was actually quite mad as the friend already had an exception made for him and then he brought a complete stranger.
However, the woman made an exception for her husband's childhood friend as he was traveling to the wedding and didn't know anyone else
Image credits: u/rspvthrpw
The unfamiliar woman didn’t make a fuss and neither did the husband’s friend, but he decided to leave with the woman he brought. The bride didn’t think much of it and believed everything was fine until the next day when her husband found out and got angry for not being consulted about this before saying anything to his friend.
A few weeks into the marriage, the husband keeps bringing up the incident especially because his friend is not answering his texts, but the OP would have felt uncomfortable with a stranger at her wedding.
To the bride's surprise, the friend didn't bring his girlfriend that the woman was already unfamiliar with, but he brought a complete stranger
Image credits: Gilbert-Noël Sfeir Mont-Liban (not the actual photo)
Invitations with plus one have quite strict etiquette rules and are seen more as a favor the wedding organizers are doing for their guests to make sure nobody feels alone. They are not mandatory, so couples pick and choose who can and can’t bring company according to their budget.
Wedding Spots’ number one rule for guests who were allowed a plus one is “Don’t RSVP and swap out the second guest’s name for someone else. If the included person will not be attending, politely notify the couple in your response,” which is not what the husband’s friend did. The friend didn’t notify the husband either, so his plus one was a surprise for both of the spouses.
Turns out, the friend and his girlfriend broke up a few days before the wedding and as he was allowed to bring someone, he took another woman to fill in the spot
Image credits: u/rspvthrpw
Other rules include to not bring someone if the invitation didn’t specify that you are allowed a plus one. They also note that “‘invited guest’ typically refers to a date, not your best friend. It’s a wedding, not an excuse to party for free with your pals.”
If the plus one is not certain that they can make it to the wedding, it’s best to notify the couple to not make them pay for empty seats at the wedding. Also, if you bring a plus one who knows the couple, it is expected for them to contribute to the gift. Lastly, if the person you’re bringing to the wedding doesn’t know the couple, it would be nice to introduce them and show appreciation for allowing them to come.
That irritated the bride and she asked the strange woman to leave, which made the childhood friend leave as well
Image credits: u/rspvthrpw
The bride didn't think much of it until her husband found out and got really mad, especially because the friend wasn't answering his texts
Image credits: Lisa Dusseault (not the actual image)
Even though etiquette says you shouldn’t bring someone that is not mentioned on the invitation, people on Reddit didn’t see the big deal of the husband’s friend staying with his companion as he traveled to be at the wedding and still came even though he just went through a breakup.
People deemed the OP to be the jerk for going behind her husband’s back and because she already paid for that person to be there, so there was no harm in him bringing someone else. She couldn’t even tell the woman to leave herself and sent a bridesmaid in her place. On top of that, the stranger didn’t do anything that would provoke such a reaction besides coming to the wedding.
We would like to hear what you think. Do you agree with commenters who say that the friend’s companion should have been allowed to stay? Do you think it was sneaky of the friend to not tell the couple he was bringing someone else as the invitation mentioned a different person’s name? Do you think it’s acceptable to bring whoever you want if you have a plus one? Let us know your thoughts!
People in the comments thought that the bride overreacted and should have allowed the friend and his plus one to stay
