“Every Word He Said Was Just Destroying His Daughter’s Case”: 30 Spicy Stories From Jurors

White judge, all white jury, white prosecutor, white public defender, three white cops did the arrest, and a black defendant accused of firearm possession. Everything going smoothly until the dumbass cops couldn’t get their story straight and we the jury found the defendant innocent. The cops had planted the gun. I never felt prouder! We even deliberated an extra 20 minutes until lunchtime to qualify for the free lunch from a local deli.

While going through the selection process they asked if anyone felt they shouldn't be on the jury. I had to tell them the defendant was my neighbor and the arresting officer was my roommate. I obviously knew the case as it happened in my driveway.

Small midwestern town, perps broke and entered a garage and stole frozen sides of beef from a big freezer. It was a drunk impulsive crime, but they had prepared enough to be concerned about leaving 'fingerprints', which they had solved by putting socks over their hands.

The prosecutor was calmly describing them running on foot with the beef in pillowcases, which were always slipping through their hands because they were clutching them between two socked hands, unable to use their thumbs. I have never struggled so hard to keep a straight face.

The first time I was called for jury duty I was the first potential juror dismissed because the man on trial was my biological father whom I hadn’t seen in about a decade.

While being questioned by the attorneys, one woman in the pool said, "I don't know if this is the right time to mention this, but the defendant looks just like my ex husband and I am having a very angry physical reaction I him.". She was not selected.

The trial I was on was wild itself (kidnapping and murder, just horrible), but the funniest part was when we, the jury, had to pass a note telling the judge that the defense attorney's zipper was down.

More absurd than anything, but…

The defendant’s wife had taken a female lover, and the man allowed the new partner to live in the house with them. They divided the house down the middle, with one half being his and one half being the two women’s. By all accounts he was incredibly generous.

That’s the backstory to the actual trial, where the lover accused the man of leaving a wheelbarrow partially on the women’s side of the property, causing her to trip and suffer extensive shoulder injuries. When the prosecuting attorney suggested that it was the man’s form of revenge, the judge shut that down right quick.

It was later revealed that the lover had an extensive medical history, including being kicked by a horse in her clavicle, and had dealt with many many medical incidents before the trip and fall.

It took us about twenty minutes to find the defendant not guilty, but we waited longer to say we reached a verdict because there was pizza on the way.

I was recently on a jury for a murder trial. Thought it would be fine - I’ve been on jury for other violent offenses, no issues.

First day of the trial I found out the murder happened two blocks from my house. The victim was shot at 5am. Discovered at about 7am. I walk past that exact spot at 6:30 every day on my way to work. If I hadn’t stayed home sick that day, I’d have been the one who found the body.

During jury selection I was sitting next to two college-age women. An attorney asked one of them whether she felt like she was easily influenced by the opinions of others. She said, "Um, I think maybe?"

Then, completely unprompted, the girl next to her said "Me too!" Pure genius if the goal was to be sent home.

I was a juror on a coroners inquest for an officer-involved fatality. The officer had been responding to a call about a hold-up at a casino so was driving lights and sirens (lights for sure, maybe sirens) down a through street at 2am (ish). A cyclist came out of an alley right in front of him. Officer hit and killed the cyclist. Turns out, the guy on the bike was the guy who had just committed the robbery. We had to determine whether the officer had broken any rules or acted maliciously. It was pretty clear the whole thing was a tragic accident. The officer felt terrible. The family of the victim was there, and it was hard for them. Just kind of a sad situation all the way around. It was also very educational. I wouldn't mind doing jury duty again.

The only time I've been called up was 23 yrs ago, and I was dismissed by the judge. Trial was for felony possession of marijuana. I told the judge I could not remain impartial due to the fact that I smoked weed all the time. He thanked me for my honesty and sent me home.

I was on a jury for a trial that lasted six weeks. The defendant was a near 70 year old man, and he was on trial for 16 counts of recording without consent. What he was recording was his encounters with multiple "escorts" he brought to his house. For six weeks, we had to watch videos of an old man banging prostitues.

I was a juror on a murder trial while heavily pregnant. Nothing crazy happened but the murderer sat and stared at me through the entire trial. I've never seen eyes like that before. Complete psychopath. Thankfully he got life with no parole.

Was on a jury for some harassment/petty property destruction of a father by his son and his son's friend. One morning one of the young guys didn't turn up in court.

Turned out someone had asked him about the trial on his Facebook wall and he REPLIED PUBLICLY with something like "I'm going to get away with it, the judge is an idiot". It was a good 15 years ago so someone physically printed it out and handed it into the court.

Was put in a jury for a murder one case. Defendant was guilty as f**k. There was a bar fight, defendant left the scene, grabbed a gun, and came back for round 2. Bar patrons saw him there, he had priors for assault and theft, and people who knew him basically said that he was a wannabe thug. Then the dumbf**k bragged about it in the holding cell, and the other inmates testified against him. All the while, his lawyer was just insulting the witnesses to discredit them (including a forensic evidence specialist for the police) and banging on about how there was no DNA evidence from random cigarette butts outside a bar. We deliberated for under 10 minutes, took an anonymous vote, and wound up with a unanimous guilty. It took longer for the bailiff to come get us than it did for us to decide.

Oh man, I had grand jury duty once and this 20 year old kid hired a hooker, got robbed by the hooker and her pimp, and the pimp tried to VENMO HIMSELF from the kid’s phone. And that’s how he got caught, because of Venmo.

I show up for every notice I'm called for. I get a full day's pay from work, and having been the director of security at a local casino for over a decade, I know most of the cops, a few of the DA investigators, and half the defendants. I'm usually excused very early in the process, even if I don't know anyone.

There was one case for an assault with only one witness. As soon as they told us who the witness was, I recognized the name and told the judge I had physically removed him from my work before. The judge happily let me go.

My father has been called for jury duty multiple times. 20 minutes into deliberation on one of the cases, a female juror stood up and screamed "We've gotta get out of here!" and proceeded to bang on the door with both fists until the bailiff came back.

He said the reality show Jury Duty was entirely believable after witnessing that

Was one of last jurors to be dismissed. Assault trial. As I was walking to lunch during the break I saw defendant assault ANOTHER person on the street. I Asked to see judge in chambers after they asked if anyone could not be impartial. I didn’t want to say it in front of the other jurors. Defense attorney begged judge to keep me on the jury (no idea why) after explaining what I had just witnessed. Judge asked me to try and out it out of my mind. I said defendant was guilty to their faces and they all asked me to stay on. San Francisco.

I served on a jury once with the most inane older woman sitting next to me the whole time. She was seriously terrible. She spent most of the trial time writing emails on her iPad, doing the crossword puzzle, or sleeping.

When she wasn't doing any of that, she was interrupting the testimony to ask people to "speak up," ask clarifying questions, make side comments to the other jurors, or to tell the attorneys or even the judge that she thought they weren't supposed to do something based on her misunderstanding of the pre-trial instructions.

Her to Judge: "I thought we weren't supposed to consider such-and-such testimony." Judge: "If something comes up and I don't want you to consider it, I'll tell you, now shut the hell up."

The best part was, once we got into deliberations, she had the audacity to volunteer herself as the foreperson. Every single one of us gave her the biggest ಠ_ಠ ever, until finally one woman managed to break through her flabbergastedness to say "I think I'd prefer it if you weren't our foreperson." We immediately elected that second woman our foreperson.

The crazy older woman also held up our deliberations with rambling anecdotes that had no relevance, and a consistent misunderstanding of the legal statutes that we were debating.

I still have no idea how she made it onto that jury, but she was genuinely trying to do a good job (when she felt like paying attention) at least she wasn't a crazy racist or anything.