Society has a lot of rules, regulations, and expectations for how you ‘should’ behave. Don’t be rude. Be demure. Be a good student. Go to college. Be skinny but not too skinny. Work at a good company. Get engaged. Get married. Have children. Buy a house. Have even more kids. Get a second car. Get along with everyone, etc.
The list is endless. Those unmet expectations can introduce a lot of stress into a person’s life. The reality is that you don’t have to meet any of those expectations. You’re free to live your life however you want and to find your path despite what you're pressured to do. In short, live as authentically as you can. The members of the popular AskWomen online community revealed the things that they love about themselves that society thinks are ‘inappropriate.’ Scroll down for their stories.
#21
Being direct in the workplace. I don't always say good morning, how was your weekend, sorry to bother you, blah blah - I just ask my question plainly or speak up whenever I feel like something needs to be said, especially when everyone is thinking something but no one has the balls [pun intended] to say it. People may not always like it but I know damn sure they respect it.
I'm like this in my personal life, too. I just say the damn thing or ask for what I want to know so there is no ambiguity. I have no patience for passive-aggressive behavior, it causes so many problems in relationships (familial or otherwise).
No one every has to wonder where they stand with me. Confrontation doesn't bother me and it doesn't have to be contentious - it's just the most open, direct, effective way of dealing with an issue.
I'm like this in my personal life, too. I just say the damn thing or ask for what I want to know so there is no ambiguity. I have no patience for passive-aggressive behavior, it causes so many problems in relationships (familial or otherwise).
No one every has to wonder where they stand with me. Confrontation doesn't bother me and it doesn't have to be contentious - it's just the most open, direct, effective way of dealing with an issue.
33points
#23
Not shaving my legs for months at a time, specially during winter, I couldn't care less!
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32points
#24
I have a deep voice. Which I adore, but it's definitly not something society wishes for in a woman.
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31points
#25
I love that I'm happy doing nothing at home.
Not sure if this is a women thing but I hate feeling pressured to go out and socialize
Not sure if this is a women thing but I hate feeling pressured to go out and socialize
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28points
#26
I like being tall, 5'11". I look like a super model mixed with an Amazon.
27points
#27
I’m a very direct and assertive woman. Growing up I was told that it wasn’t ladylike and that I needed to tone it down. I’m no longer that little girl but a direct and assertive woman. It’s served me well my whole life and I’m happy I never listened to those comments.
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27points
#28
Being ambitious, being in charge of the finances. Not scared to take risks.
27points
#29
I love my kids but I don’t like kids in general. Also don’t like “mommy”
Culture
Culture
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27points
#30
Having b**bs bigger than D.
People both men and women will assume you’re a sl*t or loose because your body decide to develop more than the norm.
If Breast size was correlated with how much sex you had; wouldn’t p*rn star be attached to wheel barrel to wheel their “sex counter” around. Oddly enough, many of the popular ones are in the small size or get breast implants around a D cup.
Proving that breast size has no relation to sexually activity.
Breast are marks of women hood, motherhood, sexual maturity and fertility.
It’s insane that modern society now deem larger breast as obscene or “too much” when they were celebrate on the past to be able to feed one child or other children who lose their mothers to young.
No one has a choice in their breast size and there very little correlation between weight and breast tissue. There are women who fit in Xsmall where size 32F bras, and women wearing size 24 with 42B bra.
The biggest thing that changes with weight lost/gain is the band size. The cup size might shrinks if you had some fat around the breast tissue.
People both men and women will assume you’re a sl*t or loose because your body decide to develop more than the norm.
If Breast size was correlated with how much sex you had; wouldn’t p*rn star be attached to wheel barrel to wheel their “sex counter” around. Oddly enough, many of the popular ones are in the small size or get breast implants around a D cup.
Proving that breast size has no relation to sexually activity.
Breast are marks of women hood, motherhood, sexual maturity and fertility.
It’s insane that modern society now deem larger breast as obscene or “too much” when they were celebrate on the past to be able to feed one child or other children who lose their mothers to young.
No one has a choice in their breast size and there very little correlation between weight and breast tissue. There are women who fit in Xsmall where size 32F bras, and women wearing size 24 with 42B bra.
The biggest thing that changes with weight lost/gain is the band size. The cup size might shrinks if you had some fat around the breast tissue.
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26points
#31
I’m plus size and always have been. My whole life I’ve received messaging from media and fashion and advertising and certain social circles that “fat” is one of the worst things a woman can possibly be. It’s unfeminine, it’s grotesque, it’s unattractive, it’s ugly.
But truth be told, I absolutely adore my curvy body. I think it’s the epitome of femininity and abundance and sex appeal and beauty. When I was around 17, I said “f**k it” and actually started *living* that way. And ya know what? I found that the vast majority of people I encountered viewed my body the same way I did. I’ve had numerous lovers over the years (many of whom have been very conventionally attractive) who treat me like a queen and can’t get enough of my body. I’ve found friends who don’t buy into diet culture and who admire my beauty for exactly what it is. I can be fashionable and trendy and cute just like anybody else. People don’t laugh at me or judge me for living my life like movies and advertisements always told me they would. Sure, fatphobia exists, but in my experience, the vast majority of the time it’s a media/Internet thing, not a real life thing. Usually fatphobia comes from a place of somebody either trying to sell you something, or projecting their own personal insecurities onto you. I’m so comfortable in my own skin and people admire that about me. They’re drawn to me *because* of my love for my plus size body, not in spite of it.
But truth be told, I absolutely adore my curvy body. I think it’s the epitome of femininity and abundance and sex appeal and beauty. When I was around 17, I said “f**k it” and actually started *living* that way. And ya know what? I found that the vast majority of people I encountered viewed my body the same way I did. I’ve had numerous lovers over the years (many of whom have been very conventionally attractive) who treat me like a queen and can’t get enough of my body. I’ve found friends who don’t buy into diet culture and who admire my beauty for exactly what it is. I can be fashionable and trendy and cute just like anybody else. People don’t laugh at me or judge me for living my life like movies and advertisements always told me they would. Sure, fatphobia exists, but in my experience, the vast majority of the time it’s a media/Internet thing, not a real life thing. Usually fatphobia comes from a place of somebody either trying to sell you something, or projecting their own personal insecurities onto you. I’m so comfortable in my own skin and people admire that about me. They’re drawn to me *because* of my love for my plus size body, not in spite of it.
25points
#32
Being child-free, unmarried, and loving it. I don't center men in my life if I don't have to. I enjoy a lot of activities alone: hiking, surfing, swimming in wild water, going to concerts, going out, etc. I dress for myself rather than for the male gaze. Perhaps the most "inappropriate" thing about me is that I stopped living for the validation and approval of others, and I'm thrilled with my life.
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25points
#33
Not coddling men. Sorry if you got upset but I’m not going to entertain your dismissive behavior toward me and make excuses for it. You’re an adult and you can pick up the phone if you really care.
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25points
#35
Being direct, having great physical strength, and not kowtowing to men.
Men in particular tend to hate all three of these things, but I love these things about myself. It also makes for fantastic douchebag radar.
Men in particular tend to hate all three of these things, but I love these things about myself. It also makes for fantastic douchebag radar.
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23points
#38
As a tattooed woman, I honestly didn’t realize how many men find them so unattractive on women. I don’t surround myself with Judgmental Judy’s either though.
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22points
#39
Appreciating the value of my physical strength.
For example, I'm more than happy to exert strength in opening up a jar of pickles (and being proud of myself for getting it done!). I'm not the type that will quickly ask a man to open it for me.
For example, I'm more than happy to exert strength in opening up a jar of pickles (and being proud of myself for getting it done!). I'm not the type that will quickly ask a man to open it for me.
20points
#40
Following dreams over money.
Now, in general, society likes to pretend that it wholeheartedly supports people to follow their dreams, but in my experience, every time I've mentioned I willingly take a pay cut to do things for a non-profit where I could be making double in a corporate world, or they see how much stuff I do voluntarily for absolutely nothing, I get some kind of lecture about how I'm going to want more financial stability in the future.
I love that I'm a caring person who thinks about the impact of my work, and that I'm not just a cog in a machine working for a paycheque. Sure, I would love more money, but I cannot and will not ever compromise my enjoyment and feeling like what I do matters for a few more dollars.
Now, in general, society likes to pretend that it wholeheartedly supports people to follow their dreams, but in my experience, every time I've mentioned I willingly take a pay cut to do things for a non-profit where I could be making double in a corporate world, or they see how much stuff I do voluntarily for absolutely nothing, I get some kind of lecture about how I'm going to want more financial stability in the future.
I love that I'm a caring person who thinks about the impact of my work, and that I'm not just a cog in a machine working for a paycheque. Sure, I would love more money, but I cannot and will not ever compromise my enjoyment and feeling like what I do matters for a few more dollars.
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18points