The wedding season is upon us. That means it’s time to brush up on some wedding etiquette! After all, such an occasion is only as great as the guests who attend it, and you wouldn’t want to be the one souring someone’s big day.
We couldn't think of a better way to do this than by looking at real-life scenarios of what to absolutely avoid doing at this special celebration. Luckily for us, this online thread is full of them, serving as didactic stories for anyone planning to attend one. To find them, all you have to do is scroll down.
#1
This was at my wedding. My cousin got lost on his way to the church and called his dad. My uncle answers his phone and starts yelling out directions, asking people what street the church was on ect.. in the middle of our vows. The minister stopped talking while my uncle gave directions without leaving his seat. Just sitting in the middle of the church yelling out directions. After the ceremony the minister said how rude my uncle was and he also performs funerals in case I wanted to k**l him.
Part of the vows. I don't remember the exact wording, but something about "I shall enter you in a way no man has, and after pulling out, a piece of me will remain inside you always".
Then, from the back of the church some one whispers loud enough for just about everyone to hear "Wait, what the f**k did he just say?".
In the middle of the reception a birthday cake was rolled out and some people started singing happy birthday (a lot of us had no idea whose birthday it was). The birthday cake was bigger than the wedding cake. Turns out it was the mother of the groom's birthday, but the bride had no idea this was going to happen.
A survey looked into this deeper and found that the worst thing guests can do related to weddings is ignore an invitation. In second place is dressing casually, even though the code dress was formal, with 79% saying it’s inappropriate.
The next faux pas is wearing something that overshadows the couple, followed by getting too drunk. Regarding overindulging in bubbly, 74% think it’s rude, 19 believe it’s fine, and 7% remain neutral.
#4
Their 3 year old son during husband and wife speeches absolutely sprinting up the walkway holding his bum yelling “ I need to poo, poo coming!!!!” With agony in his eyes. Absolute best part of the day.
The wedding was in a big Catholic Church. Undecorated. Boring ultra-religious ceremony.
But the reception was unforgettable in the worst way. It was an abandoned roller rink. When we all showed up, it was dark, and empty. All the wedding guests had to set up tables and chairs. Like a PTA meeting. Still no decorations.
The buffet was refried beans, rice, and tortillas. That’s it. No condiments. No drinks. Paper plates. No trash cans.
The bride and groom arrived 2 hours after everyone else (they went to Burger King, smoked a few bowls) and immediately started the Money Dance. The mom went around to each guest and shook a big black trash bag at us until we chipped in.
Then we were told to queue up to dance with the bride. This required “at least $5, but $20 was preferred.” The groom was drinking outside. They chose Rappers Delight because it’s a really long song so they could collect the most money.
They kept pressuring guests and relatives to dance then pushed them out of the way after 20 seconds for the next person.
When the song was over, the bride and her mom counted the money. The bride then grabbed a mic and said they they would be holding a *second* money dance because they were “so disappointed they only made $800.” They hoped for at least $2000.
Necessary background: My sister was abandoned at night on the side of the road when she was a few hours old. A Catholic priest found her, and our parents adopted her.
When she was planning her wedding, she found the priest who had found her. He agreed to officiate her wedding. He asked her if she would let him tell her story during the ceremony and she said yes.
So, day of the wedding. He’s telling this heartwarming story about how he found my sister. Then he says, But what if her mother had had an abortion instead?!
He bellowed it and went off for several minutes on an anti-abortion rant. It was absolutely bizarre.
Other high-ranking inappropriate behaviors include giving a speech without permission, proposing at someone else’s wedding, bringing a plus one without permission, and wearing white.
#7
I was at one where the bride got so drunk she passed out so they put her in a wheelchair and wheeled her around unconscious so people could take selfies with her.
When it comes to the couples themselves, people believe the worst things they can do at their wedding are ask guests to pay for their meal, show too much skin, forbid a plus-one, and charge money for the drinks.
#10
Assistant wedding planner here. One time one of my jobs was keeping a very drunk 30year old groomsman away from a 14 year old cousin.
The bride coming out of the bathroom and a man sneaking out of the same bathroom 5 minutes later.( Yes, I told the groom. He kicked me out of the wedding for "lying". The baby wasn't his and has since apologized).
The couple next to us - we knew them and had socialised with them before - took their newish born to the ceremony with them. Halfway through, it starts making noise, like babies do.
Instead of taking it outside like normal people, they pull out a phone and start playing Peppa Pig. With the volume on. Loud.
I missed that beautiful ceremony of two amazing people because all I could hear was Peppa bloody Pig. I'd rather have listened to the baby.
Some dancer girls were hired by the bride to dance and AS A JOKE at the end of the dance they would go to the groom and acuse him he had multiple children with them in the past and he left and run away while they were pregnant. Stupid idea, awkward and embarrassing, no one was laughing except the bride.
The groom sister, walked in with a wedding gown, not a white dressy dress, no, no, no, white ball gown wedding dress, looks almost identical to the bride's ....we had a hard time telling them apart! She insisted on interrupting the first dance and danced with her brother ...
Groom's mom was also wearing white ....
My uncle…. Hitting on the bride. Who was my sister…..
Edit. Point of clarification, at my sisters wedding. Not mine. But that was a big reason why said uncle was not invited when I got married. I really need to improve on my grammar, I blame the school system.
Groom was my friend. Bride's family hated/disliked him, and purposely left him out of all official pictures.
They divorced a year later because he couldn't take her family ruining things anymore.
Literally 15 seconds before she walked down the aisle, the bride texted the guy sitting next to me “I wish it was you at this end of the aisle waiting for me”.