My dad is a pretty private man. He doesn't really know how to express his feelings, and I got that from him. We were close when I was a kid, but then I turned into a teenage girl, and I think he didn't know how to deal with that. It's gotten better now, but we still don't get along the way we used to.
Anyways, I'm on break today and was looking through the family bookshelf that no one ever looks at when I stumbled upon the thesis he wrote the year after I was born. Mind you, I barely even knew this document existed since my dad rarely talks about his past, so imagine my surprise when I found out we owned a copy of it.
And... wow. It kind of feels like a punch in the gut. To me, he was always the type of person to show affection through actions rather than words, e.g., teaching me how to ride a bike or going with me to the cinema. He never tells me upfront he's proud of me or that he loves me, and that's alright because I know anyway. But seeing him so openly mushy towards me (and my mom) on such an official document was so unexpected that I thought I had misread.
Anyways, I'm on break today and was looking through the family bookshelf that no one ever looks at when I stumbled upon the thesis he wrote the year after I was born. Mind you, I barely even knew this document existed since my dad rarely talks about his past, so imagine my surprise when I found out we owned a copy of it.
And... wow. It kind of feels like a punch in the gut. To me, he was always the type of person to show affection through actions rather than words, e.g., teaching me how to ride a bike or going with me to the cinema. He never tells me upfront he's proud of me or that he loves me, and that's alright because I know anyway. But seeing him so openly mushy towards me (and my mom) on such an official document was so unexpected that I thought I had misread.