Bored Panda
30 Sad And Hurtful Stories Of People Revealing What Made Them Stop Cooking For Someone Forever
FoodOCT 6, 2022

30 Sad And Hurtful Stories Of People Revealing What Made Them Stop Cooking For Someone Forever

134
52
Nothing brings people together more than good food. For centuries, sitting around the dining table has been a wonderful bonding experience that holds a special place in various cultures across the world. Groups of friends and families gather to share mouth-watering meals, pleasant conversations, and create fond memories they will cherish for years to come.
No wonder cooking is an act of love. This time-consuming activity shows your loved ones that you care and serves as a perfect way to connect with others over a meal. Most of the time. Because as it turns out, just because something is made with passion and devotion doesn’t mean others will love it too.
"What are your 'I'll never cook for you again' stories?" recently asked Redditor bnny_ears and inspired fellow members of the 'Cooking' subreddit to come forward with their personal experiences. From relatives throwing their efforts in the trash to partners criticizing their skills, the thread instantly flooded with blood-boiling examples. Below, we gathered some of the most infuriating responses to share with you, so continue scrolling. Keep reading to also find an in-depth interview with food blogger and journalist Ellen Manning. Then be sure to upvote as you go, and let us know about your own tales in the comments!

#1

30 Sad And Hurtful Stories Of People Revealing What Made Them Stop Cooking For Someone Forever
I had an amaaaazzzzing cake from Milk Bar for my wedding — chocolate chip cake with passionfruit curd and coffee frosting. My mom loved it, and in the last months of her life (she had stage 4 lung cancer), I recreated my wedding cake so she could enjoy it while she still had an appetite. Because I was also taking care of my mom, it took me several days to make all the components and then assemble the cake. When I presented it at the dinner table for my family, my dad said, “Why did it take you so long to make *this*?”
I have not cooked or baked a thing for my father since. (My mom enjoyed the cake though, and that’s what really matters.)
297points

#2

30 Sad And Hurtful Stories Of People Revealing What Made Them Stop Cooking For Someone Forever
Had multiple friends and coworkers rave over my cooking and was asked many times to host a dinner. I finally caved and decided to do a Christmas-y dinner (not near the actual holiday, just in early December) since I knew many of them did not get home-cooked traditional Xmas dinners. I repeatedly worked with everyone to schedule a day that worked for everyone, and checked in multiple times for rsvp's. I then spent over 200$ and three days prepping a gorgeous multi-dish dinner with two amazing prime ribs as the main course. It was supposed to be for 20 people. It was hard work but I was excited to be able to give a nice experience to friends I knew usually get take out or nothing for holidays.
Out of 20 people, who all RSVP'd, only 5 showed up. Three of them weren't even my friends, but my husband's. Text after text of "sorry can't make it", "sorry other plans came up", "decided to go do X today instead" came pouring in. I even had one friend ask me to pack her a to-go box she can swing by and pick up. I was very appreciative of those that did show up, but man that night absolutely crushed me. That was 2018 and I haven't hosted a dinner party since.
261points

#3

30 Sad And Hurtful Stories Of People Revealing What Made Them Stop Cooking For Someone Forever
I once made a small batch of some sweet desert for my mom. I had gotten some frozen bread dough and flattened the center and stuffed it with apples, cinnamon and sugar. I didn’t have a recipe (I was 14). For some reason they turned out really beautiful and were delicious. My mom refused to believe I made them. Not in the cute flattering way, but in a really accusatory way where she essentially called me a liar. Not sure I ever baked anything for her again.
259points

It’s no secret that people love making their friends and family feel loved, especially when they get to show off their gastronomic skills. In fact, a survey commissioned by The Little Potato Company and conducted by OnePoll found that 71% of the 2,000 American participants said that cooking is their love language. And if there’s one universal truth we can all agree on — making someone feel happy makes us feel happy too.

But a brief scroll through the frustrating examples members of the 'Cooking' subreddit shared in the thread proves that not everyone is worthy of your kindness. Rude, disrespectful, and jaw-droppingly annoying, these people are a cook’s worst nightmare.

Thankfully, in most cases, hosting special gatherings and eating homemade meals you’ve made while sitting around the dining table is one of the most rewarding experiences out there. So to learn how to become a spectacular dinner host and gain more insight on the guests' unforgettable faux pas, we reached out to food lover, writer, and journalist Ellen Manning. Being the author of the acclaimed Eat With Ellen blog, she was more than happy to share her thoughts on the matter.

#4

30 Sad And Hurtful Stories Of People Revealing What Made Them Stop Cooking For Someone Forever
Cooked for the week while my ex was away. Came home from work and she had given it away (bar the crust of a lasagne - knowing it was my pet peeve for people to leave) because she felt I didn take her side in a petty fight with her sister. The lasagne had a six hour sauce in it I had babied all day. Made at the request of my son who loved it. She can home to a clean house, laundry all done (caught up on) with food for the week cooked and didn't notice any.of it and just wanted to complain about her sister she was away with. I suggested she needed to stop fighting with her over stupid petty s**t.
I came home from a long sh*tty day at work the next day looking forward to dinner with my family and it was gone . Given away to the Karen's at the school pick up. It was an act of spite. A final one for me. I left her.
244points

#5

30 Sad And Hurtful Stories Of People Revealing What Made Them Stop Cooking For Someone Forever
My then GF family hosted us for Christmas and I agreed to make dinner one of the nights.
I dropped about $400 on fixings for 4 course meal for 8 people Prime rib, fancy dessert ingredients, fresh sides, etc.
Made everything to everyone's strict dietary requirements (one was low salt, another no sugar, a third lactose intolerant.)
Everything came out *perfect*. Sous-vide and then seared the prime rib, fresh fruit tarts, a boatload of sides. All done in strangers kitchen, with knives that hadn't been sharpened since the 50's and appliances from the 70's.
1) An uncle complained the Med-rare rib was raw and I had to sear his slice on the stove to well done.
2) An Aunt complained that the Peach tart tasted "too fresh, not like canned peach cobbler."
3) Grandpa complained that I had used too much "real salt" (I didn't I used the Lite-salt he required) and the prime rib tasted to "meaty." He later suggested it was just a lot of work when we could have just gone to the Elk's club.
GF and her mom loved the food.
The next year we went to the Elk's club and is it was Sysco generic prepacked slop, for $50 a person.
I never cooked for her family again.
244points

#6

30 Sad And Hurtful Stories Of People Revealing What Made Them Stop Cooking For Someone Forever
Made a very nice coconut chicken soup with plenty of veggies for a date. I was super proud of how it turned out. Watched him fish out all of the vegetables because he didn't like them.
Now I only date people who eat their veggies.
218points

"I firmly believe that being a great dinner host is about having fun," Ellen told Bored Panda. "Yes, it's great to cook a wonderful meal, served on a beautifully laid table, with great drinks and the perfect soundtrack, but if you're doing all that and are so stressed you're not enjoying yourself then your guests will know, and it won't be any fun for them."

According to food blogger Ellen, the key to ensuring you can still enjoy the event is being organized. "Get your menu planned, prepare everything as much as you can, and plan a meal that will allow you to engage with your guests while you're cooking/serving, etc. That way everyone will have a great time," she said.

#7

30 Sad And Hurtful Stories Of People Revealing What Made Them Stop Cooking For Someone Forever
My parents were coming back from a long trip, and I know that's hard for them. I made turkey tetrazzini after roasting a turkey breast, and made one for them too, and left it in their fridge as a nice meal when they got back.
Mom told me a week later she tried it but she doesn't like ground turkey, so she threw it away.
My dish had chopped roasted turkey. She lied like a rug and I will never cook one more thing for her
197points

#8

30 Sad And Hurtful Stories Of People Revealing What Made Them Stop Cooking For Someone Forever
Made my (now ex's) work lunch for his first day of work after we moved in together.
He told me that his mom did a better job wrapping the carrot sticks. Never made his lunch again.
Report
196points

#9

30 Sad And Hurtful Stories Of People Revealing What Made Them Stop Cooking For Someone Forever
My husband told me that frozen dinners tasted better than my home cooking. He has been eating frozen dinners or fast food for many years.
187points

But how can you know for sure your guests had a good time and genuinely enjoyed the meals you made for the party? Ellen shared with Bored Panda a few subtle things to look out for: "You can usually tell if people are enjoying their food by the way they react while they're eating it."

"If we're honest, most polite people would never slate something you've slaved over to your face and will tend to be quite complimentary," she added. But there's a category of people, however, who may be too polite or kind to cause a commotion. Who won't tell you the truth no matter what. Well, Ellen mentioned it’s easy to tell the difference between a passionate thanks for a meal the guests loved and someone paying lip service.

"That said, people who care about you — friends and family, for example — will love the fact you've put in time and effort to cook for them and host them, regardless of whether the meal rivals something they'd get in a restaurant," Ellen said. "They just want to enjoy your company."

#10

30 Sad And Hurtful Stories Of People Revealing What Made Them Stop Cooking For Someone Forever
Thanksgiving had been at my in-laws for years. MIL usually made the main dish (though for reasons was never turkey) and kids all pitched in the sides and desserts. One year she didn't feel up to it and everyone else bowed out, didn't want to host, or had other plans. So we invited MIL and FIL over and said I'd make everything and to just bring themselves.
All the siblings invited themselves over once they heard I was hosting. So I ended up making a traditional turkey dinner spread for about 15+ people on short notice. MIL brought chicken gravy. No one else helped in any way. Complained that our new puppy who we had gated in the hallway so she wasn't underfoot licked one of the little nieces or nephews. The football game was turned on after lunch. No one helped clean up. They all left and went to the in-law's house to hang out for the rest of the afternoon. Very little gratitude. I haven't hosted a full family dinner since.
186points

#11

30 Sad And Hurtful Stories Of People Revealing What Made Them Stop Cooking For Someone Forever
My wife made a pumpkin pie once. I said "Meh". I've never seen one since. 30+ years.
Report
182points

#12

30 Sad And Hurtful Stories Of People Revealing What Made Them Stop Cooking For Someone Forever
i grilled steaks for my fiancés birthday last year. threw him a little party with some friends, and his mom invited herself to come and i couldn’t just say no. I pull the steaks off get them downstairs and serve them. she takes hers and cuts into it, says OMG ITS RAW(it was medium) and puts hers on the pan in my kitchen and cooks it into a shoe. she then proceeds to go around to everybody telling them the steaks are raw, they’re going to get sick and telling them to let her “cook them". everyone apologized to me when she left, and said they were perfectly cooked, everyone thought she was weird for that
182points

But as they say, common sense is not so common, and some people will never know how to act politely. So when asked about the most unforgettable gaffes people make while gathering at the table, Ellen explained that a lack of basic manners is the worst thing a dinner guest can do. "Yes, there are all the little etiquette things some people might frown upon, but for most of us, someone using the wrong cutlery or wine glass really isn't a big deal."

"Of course, basic manners at the dinner table are always to be expected — you wouldn't expect your guest to start picking up their food with their fingers, but overall being polite and kind to each other is all you need to be a good dinner party guest," she explained.

#13

30 Sad And Hurtful Stories Of People Revealing What Made Them Stop Cooking For Someone Forever
I work in a medical office of about 13 people. I don’t have a lot of money so when birthdays come around, I bake the cake as my “present”. There were a few small incidents that I ignored (like throwing away my homemade chocolate chip cookies in front of me because they didn’t like them) until the last one. I made orange cake with fresh oranges and orange cream frosting. Decorated and everything. Usually, everyone sings happy birthday and gives gifts/cake during lunch. I come out of patient’s room to find the office had sung happy birthday and everyone ate the cupcakes without me. Didn’t even ask if it was ok if I wasn’t there. Never again. Only family and my best friend get my baked goods from now on.
170points

#14

30 Sad And Hurtful Stories Of People Revealing What Made Them Stop Cooking For Someone Forever
I hosted a Passover Seder dinner a couple of years back to support my fiancé with a few friends and other couples. One of the attendees had pretty severe dietary restrictions and allergies (celiac disease and allergic to onions). With this in mind, I made sure to get gluten-free matzos, left onion out of many of the dishes, and even prepared a gluten-free cheesecake for him so he had a dessert. I spent HOURS in the kitchen cooking (no joke, probably 9 hours total). Instead of being thankful, he complained about how 'crumbly' the matzos were, said the cheesecake was 'no good,' and barely ate any of the food that was prepared. I was so livid I had to leave mid-meal and take a walk outside. I never invited him over for dinner again.
164points

#15

30 Sad And Hurtful Stories Of People Revealing What Made Them Stop Cooking For Someone Forever
Made red beans and rice by request for a dude I briefly dated. He came into the kitchen and without tasting anything he added A CUP OF SUGAR to the whole pot of beans, then took the lid off the rice half way thru cooking and added sugar to that too, in one dump of the measuring cup without even distributing it evenly. BTW I'm diabetic. I'm also a personal cook.
163points

But it’s hardly surprising that when people act impolitely and hurt our feelings by rejecting the meals we made, it can feel like a punch in the stomach. Especially when, according to Ellen, cooking for people is an expression of our care for them. "That's why it hurts so much when it can feel like that's not recognized and is rejected."

"Nobody wants to be rejected or mocked, and for most of us, cooking and hosting for people pushes us out of our comfort zone," the food blogger continued. "It's difficult and potentially embarrassing, which is why it means so much that they enjoy it and hurts so much if they don't."

"I can understand why someone wouldn't want to cook for someone else again if they were ungrateful or impolite, but perhaps the lesson to be learned is to be choosy with who you step out of your comfort zone for. The people who care about you will appreciate the fact you've gone the extra mile, so it's highly unlikely they'd ever be impolite."

#16

30 Sad And Hurtful Stories Of People Revealing What Made Them Stop Cooking For Someone Forever
Niece asked me to make Thanksgiving dinner for the family. I did. It was great. None of the family showed. I can't remember what their excuse was. Will never cook for them again.
150points

#17

30 Sad And Hurtful Stories Of People Revealing What Made Them Stop Cooking For Someone Forever
I spent alllllll day making bread. I made like 8 large loaves of rustic style bread for a family party. When I got there, my dad’s wife (who always has to be the center of attention and hates that people like my bread because she makes her own too) felt the crust and went “oh these are wayy too hard, disgusting” and threw them away. Mind you, each loaf had to rise for multiple hours, be checked regularly, kneaded twice, and baked - and during the baking I was continuously adding water into a lower tray in order to give them a beautiful crust. And since rising times can really make or break a loaf of bread, they had to be made individually throughout the day so they wouldn’t over proof. And this b***h didn’t even cut them. If she had cut them open and something was actually wrong with them I wouldn’t have been as upset, but she didn’t even cut them. Just immediately insulted them and threw them all in the garbage. In front of everyone. Like sorry that you only know how to make crustless sandwich bread? Soft sandwich bread is good sometimes but those beautiful bubbly golden crunchy crusts are also f*****g amazing sometimes. I had to baby those loaves all morning and afternoon - and then get ready and go to a stuffy family dinner. And the one I kept for myself was absolutely delicious. It was the most beautiful loaf I’ve made and I was so excited to show them off to my loved ones. And they would’ve gone great with our dinner menu…
146points

#18

My own mother. The lady who never, EVER used salt, butter or pepper in anything she cooked when I was young, because………….. “healthy”. You ever had Kraft Mac n cheese without butter and only nonfat milk? I have. I didn’t know it was supposed to be creamy until I was 20.
Blackenedd chicken fettucini alfredo.
I spent all day making pasta dough from scratch; 00 flour and eggs. Kneaded 3 times over 5 hours and rested overnight. Rolled lovingly, cut and dusted perfectly. $25 wedge of aged parmegiano and a touch of pecarino, beautiful local sourced butter.
The pasta was PERFECTLY al dente with a rich pasta-water developed parmesan sauce in butter. The chicken was so tender with just a hint of spice. It was one of the best meals I had EVER cooked. Simple ingredients with no flair to hide behind.
“The chicken isn’t very hot” was her complaint as she PUSHED her plate away.
**F**K**
**YOU**
136points

At the end of the day, food presents an opportunity for sharing, whether it’s the weekly Sunday Roast or a workplace lunch. And no matter who you share food with — your best friends, family members, or even total strangers — you still want to feel appreciated. "Be yourself and remember that sharing food is always about more than the food itself," Ellen advised. "It's about showing people you care, spending time with them, and having an experience that you can all join in with."

"That means it doesn't matter whether you've served up the most basic of meals or a five-course tasting menu. It's always about more than the food on the plates, so prioritize enjoyment and care over anything else. That will shine through and guarantee your guests — and you — have a great time," Ellen concluded.

#19

30 Sad And Hurtful Stories Of People Revealing What Made Them Stop Cooking For Someone Forever
Nother husband story… when we were dating he told me he loved Mexican wedding cookies so I tested a couple of recipes and made them for him. A couple months later his cute coworker handed out bags of Mexican wedding cookies for Christmas. He told me hers were better. Never made them again.
135points

#20

30 Sad And Hurtful Stories Of People Revealing What Made Them Stop Cooking For Someone Forever
I think I was 27 or so and had invited my Mom, Aunt, Uncle, Cousin, his Wife, and my Grandmother down for thanksgiving. Add me and my wife that makes 8.
We do a late lunch around 2, with snacks and such starting around noon.
I make the whole goddamn meal. Dressing, casseroles, green beans, snacks, and the best f*****g Turkey I’ve ever smoked. It came out crispy and succulent, I injected it with an herb/butter/garlic/beer reduction, I’d pulled the skin away from the meat and rubbed herb butter underneath. It was glorious when it came off the smoker at just a few minutes past 2:00. They didn’t show up until after 4:00, the skin was rubbery because it had sat covered for so long, I tossed it in the oven to warm up but the skin was not salvageable and the meat dried out.
I HAD ONE GODDAMNED BITE OF THAT BIRD WHEN IT WAS PERFECT. THEN THEY HAD THE F*****G AUDACITY TO COMPLAIN ABOUT IT TO MY FACE.
I just said “it was much better when it came off the smoker at 2:00” and I’ve not cooked for any of them since.
Edit: “beet” to “beer” I did not make a beet reduction.
129points
134
52