“The Safe Word is Avocado” might seem like a random name for a Facebook page filled with memes, but that’s precisely what makes it so perfect. Online, things don’t always have to make sense for us to love them. This group is proof of that, with over 59K followers who are all in on the joke.
What’s truly great about memes is how their silliness often makes them even better. They can be weird and offbeat, yet still universally understood. It’s no wonder researchers like Paolo Gerbaudo refer to memes as a kind of “language.” They transcend cultures and connect people in ways that words alone sometimes can’t.
Memes are truly everywhere. No matter where you are on the internet—whether you’re scrolling through Bored Panda or laughing at a cheeky email from a coworker—you’re bound to run into them. In 2020, over 1 million memes were shared daily on Instagram alone, a number that’s likely only grown in the years since.
Because memes are so pervasive, it’s easy to dismiss them as unimportant—something we laugh at and then quickly forget as soon as the next one comes along. But therapist and mental health writer Theodora Blanchfield believes they hold much more significance.
“Memes get trivialized and disparaged, yet, they’re an important social currency and way of communicating online in this day and age,” she argues. “These small, often funny pieces of content are important for their ability to share ideas quickly and succinctly as well as foster a sense of connection and feeling seen.”
Blanchfield thinks that memes have reshaped how we communicate, and she sees it as a positive change. “As both a therapist and ‘regular’ human, I’m glad that we have this way of communicating,” she says.
She echoes the thoughts of other researchers on how memes can act as a shared language. “Think of a time you felt excluded from a group, because it felt like they were speaking an entirely different language with references you didn’t understand,” says Blanchfield.
“Or, on the contrary, think of a time where you were the one to clue in a group about a popular meme that they somehow didn’t know about. If you felt a small rush of power, you’re not petty. (Or at least no more petty than me.)” In a sense, being “fluent” in the language of memes makes us feel like we’re part of something together.
Blanchfield also points out that there’s an evolutionary reason behind that small feeling of power when we “get” a meme. Historically, having more information was crucial for survival. “Knowing that a tiger was coming when someone else didn’t could have meant the difference between life and death,” she says. “Missing out on a meme won’t kill you, but having that shared language will help bring you closer.”
There’s a lot of talk about how memes create a sense of connection, but it shouldn’t be overlooked, especially in a time when many people feel isolated. A recent Meta-Gallup survey found that nearly 1 in 4 adults worldwide experience feelings of loneliness.
Of course, the reasons behind this vary from person to person. For Blanchfield, as a therapist, it often stems from the nature of her work. “I can’t talk much about what happened at work to people in my life, other than in incredibly broad strokes,” she shares. However, she’s found support and understanding in a dedicated psychotherapy meme group, which has made a difference for her.
One of the greatest strengths of memes is their ability to express things that might be difficult to articulate, not just because the words are hard to find, but also because it can be emotionally challenging to say them out loud. Research suggests that humor can help us address taboo subjects, and various studies have shown that memes have become a valuable tool for discussing topics related to mental health.
“I’m grateful that my friends and clients have used memes to communicate with me in order to say the hard things—to make jokes about their traumas or an element of dealing with chronic depression, for example,” says Banchfield.
Moreover, memes can offer validation when other things fall short. “Sometimes, no matter how many ways I phrase something or ask something to a client, they still have a hard time wrapping their head around the fact that they’re not The Only Person Who Has Ever Felt That Way,” says Banchfield. In these moments, coming across a relatable meme or image can really make you feel seen.
