#1 When Your Three Year Old Tells A Man At McDonald's That His Pants Are Falling Down
#2 She Said "Look Mom!" So I Looked And She Was Posing Like This. I Think My Daughter Has Some Talent
"I am as guilty as any parent for feeling like we need to go places to keep our kids entertained," Samantha, who runs the witty Walking Outside in Slippers blog, opened up to Bored Panda in an email.
"But I feel like my kids often have the most fun hanging out at home, roller skating around the block, or playing with the neighbors," she said.
"When I play a board game with them or we do family karaoke, that's when the real fun begins. Spending time with our kids can be as simple as a family dinner with no phones allowed."
Samantha noted that quality time together doesn't have to cost you money. Nor does it have to involve driving places.
Some parents feel pressured to be 'perfect.' So, they worry that they might not be 'as good' at parenting as other people that they see online or in real life. We asked Samantha for her thoughts on how to let go of this perfectionist mindset.
"Any parents who give off an impression of perfection are faking it, pure and simple," she told Bored Panda.
"We all have our struggles, and hopefully our triumphs. It is freeing to be vulnerable with other parents and admit your doubts and challenges," she said.
"You might find, like I have, that being open enables better bonding with fellow parents."
Every family’s approach to raising children is going to vary, but some broadly accepted truths get you the best results. Ideally, as a parent, you should aim to raise kids who are confident, independent, resilient, empathetic, and capable. On the flip side, you want to avoid situations that might eventually make your children lose their self-esteem, disrespect all authority figures, or approach life with anxiety rather than purpose and clarity.
That’s easier said than done. Nobody’s perfect. Everyone’s human and makes mistakes. But as a parent, you really do need self-awareness, intent, and to pivot when you realize you’re messing up.
There are four main parenting styles that researchers generally single out: authoritative, authoritarian, permissive, and uninvolved (also known as neglectful) parenting.
In simple terms, the first style is the best, while all the others are imbalanced, fulfilling only a part of the kids’ needs and wants. Meanwhile, the last one is the most damaging to a young child’s self-esteem and can have negative repercussions for their entire adult life.
In a nutshell, authoritative parenting focuses on a balanced approach that mixes love, support, connection, responsiveness, and transparency with clear rules, expectations, and communication. It’s a fair approach where the parent takes the time and energy to engage with their children’s feelings, not shying away from explaining to them why certain rules exist, why they shouldn’t be broken, and what will happen if they are.
Generally, authoritative parents raise children who go on to be independent, confident, well-adjusted, and socially competent adults. That being said, there’s no such thing as a ‘perfect’ parent. The authoritative parenting style is the most time-consuming and requires a lot of effort.
If you sometimes fall short of your ideal standards, try not to beat yourself up over it. Just learn from your mistakes and do better. Be kind. Be patient. Be nurturing.
If the authoritative style is the North Star of parenting, guiding everyone, then the authoritarian, permissive, and uninvolved styles are what you want to avoid as much as possible. According to research, authoritarian parents generally value only one-way communication where they set very strict rules for behavior at home and outside of it. They have very high standards, don’t tolerate mistakes, and want their rules to be followed without question.
Generally, authoritarians aren’t very nurturing. They’re also rather inflexible and dislike negotiations. Kids who grow up in these sorts of households tend to be well-behaved and are good at following instructions.
That being said, this parenting style can also raise young adults who are aggressive or shy, socially inept, and struggle to independently make decisions. Their self-esteem can suffer. Alternatively, authoritarian parents can also raise kids who rebel against any and all authority figures when they grow up.
