Bored Panda reached out to a professor within the Department of Psychology, Nick Neave, who is the Director of the Hoarding Research Group, Faculty Director of Ethics, and Chair of the Faculty Research Ethics Committee. We asked him some questions about human psychology concerning our attachment to objects. Most of the time, owning a lot of stuff and having sentiments towards objects is natural as it is in human nature.
As Nick wrote: “Humans are social animals and forming attachment bonds to other people is part of our evolutionary history, and important to our survival and wellbeing. These attachment bonds can ‘spread’ and so we also form strong attachments to non-humans (pets) and also to inanimate objects (our possessions). Our possessions form a key part of our ‘self’ – they indicate our personality, and signal to others our likes and dislikes, and our social status (e.g. our choice of music, books, fashion, design, movies, etc.). It is very rare for people to have no possessions.”
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We were wondering whether the attachment to objects can, in a way, replace humans. Nick answered: “Yes – we see this in people who display hoarding behaviors – they have typically experienced traumatic and chaotic lives, and have found that other people (i.e. parents, romantic partners, etc.) cannot be relied upon (they are neglectful or abusive, for example) and so they form intense attachments to objects. Objects can be relied upon, and do not cause emotional trauma like other people do. People who strongly attach to objects (i.e. hoarders) can be socially isolated and lonely, and see objects as ‘friends’ and as having human-like qualities (this is called ‘anthropomorphism’), so that they think that a book might be ‘feeling unwanted’ or ‘lonely’ in a shop window and so they go and buy it.”
With that being said, we asked why it is so difficult to throw away old, sentimental things. The professor answered: “As we form intense emotional attachments to objects, it becomes hard to get rid of them. These attachments might have a sentimental connection to a loved one (a parent’s watch, a child’s first shoes, for example), and if that person is no longer alive, then getting rid of the item feels like losing the person again – some keep the item and avoid feeling the emotional loss once more. People who anthropomorphize objects often say that they don’t want to get rid of things because the things might get ‘offended’ or ‘upset’ at being discarded. They are also afraid of getting rid of things ‘in case they need them again in the future’.”
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We all do have some sort of attachment to owned objects. Some clothes stay hanged in our closets year after year without being worn. But we were wondering, what could count as an unhealthy attachment to objects?
Nick wrote: “This is difficult to say because it all depends on a person’s circumstances. What might seem useless to one person – say, an old bus ticket, might have deep significance to another person – it might be the bus ticket they used when they visited their aunt who then died shortly after – the ticket is the reminder of their last journey to see their much-loved relative and is thus imbued with feelings, emotions and sentiment. However, if hoarding objects begins to interfere with the normal activities of daily life – i.e. cooking, sleeping, using a bath or toilet, then that person might have a problem, as such conditions can be bad for their health and mental well-being and can soon reach a point where daily life becomes impossible.”
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If you feel like you might have unhealthy attachment issues to objects, or you know someone who does, it might not be an easy fix, but eventually, working towards finding help will make your or another person's life easier.
Here is the advice that Nick shared: “It is very difficult to remove unhealthy attachments – doing so involves working closely with therapists and de-clutterers, the best de-clutterers are often people who have been hoarders in the past and so they can be very insightful when they try to help other people. The process can take time and patience but there can be very positive results. There are some self-help books and websites but it is better to try and work with another person as they can help with the burden of ‘making a decision’ about getting rid of something, and provide moral and social support.”
And lastly, Nick added: “Our research has shown that people not only form strong attachments to physical objects but also to digital objects (i.e. photos, music, etc.) and we have created new questionnaires to measure digital hoarding in the workplace and in one's personal life. Our Hoarding Research Group at Northumbria University is very interested in how people form strong attachments to virtual and physical objects and how those connections can be changed or affected by other experiences, etc.”
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FYI it still works!
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