Hey Pandas, What's The Most Embarrassing Pick-Up Line You've Used?

How it’s supposed to go — Me: Would you rather eat a goat or a matter baby? Them: What’s a matter baby? Me: :puts hand on their shoulder: nothing, honey! How it went — Me: Would you rather eat a goat or a matter baby? Them: Goat. Definitely goat. Goat tastes like venison.

(A random call to my ex)

Me: Were u born on a highway? cuz thats where accidents happen.
Him: Who is this?

I asked someone out for coffee...... that WORKED at a coffee shop..... *face palm*

For this one to work, you have to really sell it. (Got this from a friend, have not actually used it yet).
Person 1: *Starts acting panicked* Aw dang it, I can't find it!
Person 2: What? What happened?
Person 1: I think I lost my number. Can I have yours?

Did you fall from Heaven? Because it looks like you landed on your face.

mind, I'm a gay enby junior higher...

1. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put "u" and "i" together ;)
2. When I'm around you, I cant think straight
3. Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?
4. Are you a parking ticket? Cuz you’ve got fine written all over you.

That’s not sunshine, it’s me - smiling
(Referring to my outdoor selfie)

I used the pick-up line: ‘according to the law of gravity, I’m attracted to you and you’re attracted to me…’ didn’t go as planned, turns out she’s a flat-earther *facepalm* and doesn’t believe in that kinda stuff. Got very offended too.

I've heard kissing is the language of love, if you like we could continue our conversation using that.
(She asked me if I know cheesy pick up lines)

1. Your dad is a thief… he stole all the stars from the sky and put them in your eyes.

2. Do you want to come back to mine for sex and pizza?… No…. Why? Don’t you like pizza?

I remember a period of time in my teens where I would keep a tiny metal screw in my pocket. I'd walk up to someone and say "Wanna screw?" with a bit of a mischievous grin, then I'd pause and hand them the screw from my pocket 😆. It was more of a joke than a pickup line though, since I just did it to people I already knew. I've never used an actual pickup line on someone, I have enough trouble just saying "Hi" lol 🤷🏼‍♂️

How much can you lift?
Well, I’m about (insert age here), think you can do me?
(He didn’t realize it was a pickup line)

This isn't really a pick up line, but it's something funny i saw.

Girl asks: What you doing?
Man replies with two texts
1: playing xbox with the boys (didn't go thru)
2: You? (did go thru)
Girl: I'm all alone :)

For a guy name Tony and said his name backwards was Y not?

Get your coat you've pulled

Here's 50p phone your mum and tell her you won't be home

Are you a trip? Because I've fallen for you.

Are you a witch? Because I think you've bewitched me.

I didn't use these, but they've been used on me and my best friend

Guy: Hey, I think my phone's broken
Friend: ???
G: Cause it doesn't have your number in it
F: *dies of embarrassment*
Me: *dies of laughter
-----------
Guy: Hey are you a parking ticket? Cause you've got fine written all over you
Me: No. Fvck off.
G: Aw come on? Not even a smile?
M: Not a chance

Jesus these were so embarrassing, everyone was staring at us after these happened (two seperate incidents btw)

I used this on my friend as a joke cuz we were talking abt pick up lines
"Your hand looks heavy, can I hold it for you?"
She put her hand on my shoulder and said thanks, still laugh about it

which one should i ask my crush out to the valentines dance with?

1. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put "u" and "i" together ;)

2. When I'm around you, I can't think straight

3. Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?

4. Are you a parking ticket? Cuz you’ve got fine written all over you.

5. Your dad is a thief… he stole all the stars from the sky and put them in your
Eyes.

6. Person 1: *Starts acting panicked* Aw dang it, I can't find it!
Person 2: What? What happened?
Person 1: I think I lost my number. Can I have yours?

7. I ought to complain to Spotify for you not being named this week’s hottest single.

8. No wonder the sky is dark at night and the clouds are white—all the color is in your eyes.

9. I always thought happiness started with an ‘h,’ but it turns out mine starts with ‘u.’

10. On a scale of 1 to America, how free are you tonight?

11. If you were a taser, you’d be set to ‘stun.’

12. Is your name Google? Because you have everything I’m searching for.

13. Do you ever get tired from running through my thoughts all night?

14. Your hand looks heavy—can I hold it for you?

15. If you were a fruit, you’d be a ‘fine-apple.’

16. If I had a nickel for every time I saw someone as beautiful as you, I’d have five cents.

17. If beauty were time, you’d be eternity.

18. I’m really glad I just bought life insurance, because when I saw you, my heart stopped.

19. I’m no photographer, but I can definitely picture us together.

20. I was going to say a cheesy pickup line, but when I saw you, I became speechless.

21. I’d say, ‘God bless you,’ but it looks like he already did.

22. I may not be the best-looking person here, but I’m the only one talking to you.

23. if you were words on a page, you’d be fine print.

24. Life without you is like a broken pencil…pointless.

25. Somebody better call God, he’s missing an angel.

"are you lightning? cuz you're mcqueen" (this has become an inside joke lmfaoo)

I had an above the knee amputation back in 2003. I also do product recalls. My stump had shrunk so my leg didn't fit that well. I was working in a department store and saw a gorgeous young lady. I told myself "don't look at her! You'll trip and fall!" I looked and I fell. She rushed over to see if I were ok. I said "don't tell me that I am the first guy who fell for you". She gave me a look and left.