Hey Pandas, What's The Most Absurd Advice You've Heard About Suicide?

I don't know how to edit my article to include this info:

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE, IF YOU ARE FEELING SUICIDAL, AND DON'T HAVE FRIENDS OR FAMILY WHO WILL BE WITH YOU OR SUPPORT YOU, AND YOU CAN'T GET THROUGH ON A HOTLINE,
PLEASE, S'IL-VOUS-PLAÎT, POR FAVOR, PLEASE, CALL ON THE EMERGENCY SERVICES IN YOUR AREA AND ASK FOR HELP!!
I care about you and I want you to get the support you need.