Hey Pandas, What’s The Funniest Thing That Has Ever Happened To You? (Ended)

Don't know if it is funny, but certainly a happy one for me.

So it was back in the 90s, I was madly in love with this girl. It was at the time when I had quit my job and started my own business. Everything was going well and we were planning to get married.

But her single mother suddenly started opposing as I don't have a permanent job, and she won't do anything against her mother's will as she was her only child.

So, I became sad and lost. One day two of my friends called me and took me on a trip to make me feel better. We started exploring western side of the country and after two or three days, we ended up in this bar. My friends got boozed up, and I was sitting alone thinking about her. I couldn't control myself and started crying.

The bartender was a nice guy, he showed interest in me and asked me my story. I told about her and showed her photo and all. He tried to cheer me up and he was like everything will be alright, don't lose hope etc.

We continued the trip and reached home after few days. I wanted to meet her desperately and I went straight to her house and knocked the door. But, it was a guy who opened the door and invited me in. He was her uncle (her mom's brother) He asked about my family, business and all and finally he said he and his sister are okay with my wedding.

I was shocked. I couldn't believe what just happened. Turns out he was living in the west and was a friend of the bartender who I spoke to.

Thing is that I showed her photo and forgot to take it back. Bartender told my story to him and showed the photo. Her uncle, being the gentleman he is, went to her house and spoke to her mom and convinced her.

Anyway, we are getting ready to celebrate our 28th anniversary in few months.

Philosophy lecture. The weather was great, so we decided to make a seminar on the lawn, below a conker tree. It was early fall, so they were already falling. The lecturer started a seminar, but quickly noticed that most of us didn't read-in into the text that we were supposed to analyze, myself included. The lecturer asked: "Who has read this text?" Uncomfortable silence, people start looking at one another. I said "Let the god hit those that didn't read the text get with a conker!" in a joking manner (we've read theology that day). And BAM! Conker hits my head just as I finished my sentence. Everyone laughed and the seminar continued. It was the only time God has given me an (unwanted) answer to my plea.

This literally happened within seconds when I was alone. I cracked a raw egg on the edge of the frying pan to scramble it. It missed, heading for the floor. With reflexes that still astound me, I snatched a nearby utensil & actually caught the raw egg mid-air!! Elation turned to astonishment as the egg hit the floor. The utensil was a slotted spoon..... Speed of light successions of feelings: "Oh No!", "Yes!!", "A SLOTTED spoon!!??!!" Never laughed so much cleaning a floor.

I was working at a distribution center for a major retail chain around Christmastime unloading trucks. For those who don't know, the trucks are filled in "walls" of product that you slowly take down to unload it. I was throwing a truck full of toys, when the wall in front of me destabilized and came tumbling down on me (i was fine, just startled). I looked at the boxes, and it was cases and cases of Jenga.

This isn’t my story but my parent’s story. My dad was just engaged with my mum pretty much a week before this. They were at a cafe with my mum’s parents and they were sitting outside. My dad got a Coke can while the others got coffee. Then a bee landed on his coke can. He flicked it off and as soon as he flicked it my grandpa leaned over exposing just a tiny bit of his crack. My dad flicked it right into that crack and then my grandpa started running around yelling his butt was on fire. My dad then had to help him get the stinger out in the bathroom.

My daughter has a condition that makes her especially tiny, but she doesn't have dwarfism. Anyway, she was 3 years old and still wearing size 18 months baby clothes. Well, those pants are designed to be worn over diapers and she wasn't wearing them because she was potty trained. Her pants refused to stay up, so we went to a few places on a mission for the smallest belt possible. They don't make belts for people as small as she was. After looking at every store that sold baby clothes we were leaving Walmart when I told her, "I give up! You are going to have to wear dresses! You have no butt." So naturally, in a very loud toddler voice, she stated "of course I have a butt mommy! I can poop!" There is absolutely no arguing with that statement, and about 20 people, including myself, got a good laugh out of my tenacious little girl. She wasn't wrong!

Last year my family and I went on a road trip. My 5 year daughter was passed out in the back sleep. As soon as the song ‘Old Town Road’ was playing immediately she woke up from her deep sleep and started screaming the lyrics at the top of her lungs. It was hilarious! XD

I was working at a cafe that had sandwich fillings that came in pouches in boxes with slots in the sides. It was 4 a.m. and I had stuck my fingers through the slots to dump out the box like I always did. I look down into the box and saw fingers! My first thought was oh my God somebody lost their fingers and are in this box! LOL they were mine, but I had a nice heart attack before my sleep deprived brain caught up! (My oldest was barely 4 months old at the time)

When I was in second grade I was feeling especially gassy as the teacher was giving final instructions before everyone went home for the day. I was trying really hard to hold it in until everyone started being noisy at the bell, but my belly had other plans. So instead I tried to discreetly learn sideways and was aiming for something fairly silent. Again, it didn't go as planned! At the moment I moved it came out full force! I was humiliated! But everyone turned to the class clown who was sitting on my left. Both our faces were bright red and I tried to hide my face, but EVERY SINGLE PERSON in the room blamed that poor guy! I still feel bad, but also still can't help but laugh. Lol

I was with my friends in school and it was dark I saw a black figure in front of me I screamed like crazy saying"There is a kidnapper in front of me! " The light came on that second and it was the Christmas Tree, I was like???

(excuse my poor English)
So one time in sixth grade, my friend, who is the class clown, was sitting beside me and acting like the clown that she is, doing funny stuff, so the class laughed along with the teacher. I laughed too, but I couldn't stop even after the whole class stopped and the teacher continued the lesson. I was laughing so hard that my lungs were empty of air and I couldn't take a breath. No one noticed since I wasn't even making a sound. I kept laughing at myself. I tried to sign to my friend that I was choking, but she just looked at me in horror while I laughed the hell out of my soul. I pressed my face on the table while laughing. Then I noticed the class was strangely quiet so I looked up and they were all staring at me, including the teacher. Someone pointed out that my face was so red. I laughed out of embarrassment.The teacher came over and was like
"omg r u ok?"
Yes,sir, I'm perfectly fine. Just regularly choking cuz I laughed too hard.
He offered me water, but seriously what the heck, how could I drink while laugh-choking, I will choke even more.
I slammed my hands on the table out of desperation, and I just rest my head on the desk in defeat and continued dying.

It was on Halloween. We were going to our 3rd-period class when a Dementor (Harry Potter) jumped in front of me. Dementors freaked me out a lot so a dropped my stuff and kicked the thing. Only then did I realize it was my friend in the costume. There were teachers watching, but I didn't even get in trouble!

Umm I don't know if this is actually funny but whatever...
So I'm a HUGE Disney fan and I watch the movies whenever I can.
One day I was sleeping in the main room next to the TV and my siblings were watching the new Aladdin and ''Whole new world'' came on and well let's just say I woke up screaming the lyrics...

I have extremely low self-esteem and genuinly think I am not all that attractive so when a guy asked me for my number for the very first time I was so in shock that I forgot my own number. I made the mistake of admitting it and he told me "You could have just said you were not interested haha".... that poor man really didn't know I meant it.

I was working over summer at my school library with my friend. We had different jobs---I was in charge of organizing newspapers, magazines, journals, etc., while she worked at the circulation desk (checking in/out books, shelving/unshelving books, etc.). I was generally more free during working hours.

My friend is easily spooked, but she has a habit of listening to creepy detective podcasts while shelving the books. One day, I was taking a break from work and saw her working...so I snuck behind the shelf she had her back to. She was working with her earbuds in, so she didn't even hear me giggling my butt off.

I reached through the books and prepared to poke her shoulder. Right at that moment, she seemed to hear something and turned, making direct eye contact with my finger, which then made light contact with her shoulder.

Predictably, she screamed, but it wasn't one of those "omg you surprised me" yelps. It was a full on "OMG WTF IS THAT" strangled yelp-scream. It literally echoed through the library.

She did attempt to beat me up with a textbook right after. She later told me, "I was listening to a story about a murderer who cut off the hands of their victims, and then I turned around to see a hand that literally appeared outta nowhere."

My favorite prank EVER, and my and my friend's favorite memory.

we were visiting new york and we went to coney island to ride the cyclone and at first i dnt know what to ecxpect and then it dropped and i was so scared i bit my lip open and started splurting blood all over my brother and he looked like a seerial killer i couldnt stop laughing

I was at the gas station one morning when the Male attendant came over the speaker at my pump and said," Good Morning Pumpkin." Well, I had just read some female empowerment novel and I was not happy about his comment. I mean, just because I am a tiny blond girl in a pink winter coat does not give him a right to greet me with a "cutesy" name! He doesn't know me! I am get more furious by the minute and about to approach him and tell him what I think (which is something I NEVER do) when I happen to glance up and see I am at Pump #10. The man said, "Good morning PUMP 10!" not "pumpkin"

I was on a plane about 25 years ago. It was full of very happy Irish men on their way to Glasgow for a stag party. The banter was really hilarious. Half way through the flight we hit some turbulence and an air hostess went walking down the aisle to make sure we were all OK and buckled in. As she approached one of the men from the stag party, the plane dipped sharply causing her to lose her balance. She flung her hand out to balance herself and in doing so slapped the man across the face. The poor woman was mortified and began apologising profusely. The man sitting next him said "Oh, don't worry about him, that's our Graham. He's well used to having his face slapped by a pretty girl." The whole plane just erupted into laughter. It was brilliant.

Don't know if this is the weirdest, but definitely the funniest. As I finished breakfast I heard a loud crash. I go out to the window to see someone's sliding (mesh) window pane outside our window. (Note: I live in an apartment and my window had grills fitted on by the owner. Also the net part was to keep insects out) The person calls us up saying that his window pane fell down. He then proceeds to drop a rope. Since there was no place or holes to tie it up, we ended up making holes in the net part. With my roommate's help, we tied it up and asked him to pull it up. I don't have any clue but the people in the opposite wing was clapping as the window was being pulled up. After the person received the window, he screams thank you and I proceed to say welcome. Tbh not the weirdest thing but one of the funniest things happened in this lockdown.

To keep my 3 year old behaving while grocery shopping. she was allowed to pick out the dog treats we would buy for our beloved pet if she was "good." When we got to the check out line, she saw the displayed candy and started fussing. I reminded her that "you already have your dog treats!" The lady behind me said quietly. "I'm not judging, because she looks healthy." It felt weird explaining...