Hey Pandas, What’s The Best Excuse You’ve Ever Said Just Because You Didn’t Want To Say No? (Closed)

We were in another country for a project meeting. I specifically didn't want to attend a long, boring training. I had already taken it twice before, so it was really a wasting of time. I stormed out of the conference room; one of the organizers tried to stop me, but kept running, claiming that I had diarrhea.

My boss called shortly me to ask why I had left. I explained - in a sober voice - that there were 2 things in this world that people could not fight: falling in love and the urge to poop. I spent the rest of the afternoon in the hotel room, reading, with a glass of wine and some nice music.

Them: Why not?

Me: Because I don't have to

When I was a teenager and realized I wasn’t too fond of social interactions I would say “my mom said no”.

Now that I am married I tell people, “let me ask my husband” and then I blame it on him for not feeling super comfortable around other people.

He is okay with it because we would rather have margaritas and a good movie at home than being around other people sometimes.

Now… when people ask if I can babysit, I tell them my dog is too playful and energetic. When they suggest if I can go to their house I tell them my dog has separation anxiety.

I know.. I am a coward haha

I don't have any problem whatsoever saying no. The problem is the whining because someone can't accept no for an answer.

“I wish I could attend but I have an appointment to depolarize my car’s flux capacitor warp nacelle.”

My mom said no was my excuse for anything when I was young. I'd make sure she knew too so all my bases were covered

I'm in college, so homework is my go-to. Sometimes it's true, and sometimes you just need 72 hours to recharge before you deal with other humans.

sorry, can't. bra is already off.

I usually reply with something nonsenical and off-topic.

"Do you want to go to a party?"

"I once kicked a ballerina."

One winter, we had a really exceptional snowfall. They kept telling people to stay off the roads because you WILL get stuck, and businesses were all closing early. I'd just picked up a family member from work (I had a truck, they did not) and we passed a truck on it's side 8 feet up on a snow bank on the way home. Not safe out and getting worse. It was my day off, but sure enough, my boss calls. "There are a lot of call outs, can you come in?" I laughed. "Have you been following the weather? They're expecting a state of emergency to be announced within the hour and the store will have to close then! In fact, why are you even open now, the rest of the mall is closed!" He hemmed and hawed around that but said he could come pick me up if I was afraid to drive in the snow. "I grew up where 2 or 3 feet of snow was normal; I've known how to drive in the snow for a very long time. This isn't "driving in the snow". This is "being a f*****g idiot and trying to drive in a blizzard when the government says stay home". He said, "does that mean you won't come in?" You couldn't pay me enough. The emergency declaration came not 10 minutes after I hung up, but it was too late for the manager, who had to overnight at the store with a few others he convinced to stay later.

anything regarding my two small children have gotten me off the hook quite a bit.

I have a few go to excuses:
1.) I’m breaking in a new pair of pajamas this weekend.
2.) I’m sorry, but these pillows and blankets have accepted me as one of their own and it would be rude to leave them.
3.) I’d love to, but I’m completely booked until May of 2046. I can pencil you in sometime after that.
4.) Oh! My palm reader (or fortune teller) said I should avoid doing _______ (fill in the blank) right now.
5.) You know how when you’re on parole you can’t do certain things? Yeah, I can’t do that right now. (And if they ask “You’re on parole?” I just say, “No, but it’s like that. So, I still can’t do that right now.”)
6.) I’m pretty sure a trained assassin is looking for me right now, so I need to stay home and hide. It’s as much about your safety as it is mine.
7.) That sounds like fun, but I’m going to be extremely busy not doing that.
8.) Oh, I can’t do that. My dog won’t let me.

"Let me check my calendar... Oop, sorry, [insert thing here] is already scheduled!"

Someone tries to invite me to go somewhere on the weekend.

I usually say I work weekends and will be tired after work.

This isn't actually a lie, as my two days off are Tuesday or Wednesday, and I wake up at 6am (working until 5pm on weekends).

My backup answer is that I usually have other plans, which, once again is not a lie. I usually do apartment chores or shopping on my days off.

I have learnt to say no to the people I don't know properly.The ones I know,I am comfortable enough to say no and they are comfortable enough to listen it vice-versa.

Yeah, so I went to put your birthday cake in the oven, and it slipped and fell on the floor, and I slipped in the batter and now I've hurt my back so sorry, can't come! Doordash is bringing you a cake from the store.

"Sorry, we have plans." "What plans?" "Family stuff" or "Grandkids coming."

I say that I have a migraine when I want to cancel plans last minute.

I'm sorry I can't get off the toilet.

I'm sorry, I can't do that tonight. Im trying to find a f**k that I give about that.