Hey Pandas, What's A Rare Insult You've Received From Someone? (Closed)

In grade 10 I would argue with my math teacher for at least 10-15min at the start of every class. The rest of the students just watched. He would also tell us, religiously, that he didn’t care if we passed because he still got paid.

So one day in our usual bickering match I said “you always tell us you don’t care, then why do you bother to spend every day arguing with me?”
He paused for a second, then said “that’s the smartest thing I’ve ever heard you say” and went to the blackboard. I literally did not know what to say. Thanks? I think?

Not one that was directed at me:
my friend was like "Hey I have a cool insult" and it was

"Sharp as a marble, that one"

Lol

I complained about a loud-mouthed, drunk man at the ballet and he told me my voice was quieter than a mouse's fart. Admittedly the insult was in German, but I think it still stands!

Used to work as a cashier in a market, if someone was being rude or abusive I would say "I hope you have the day you deserve" instead of "have a nice day." Some of them, used to the common send-off, would respond 'thanks'.

I remember back in like 5th or 6th grade, I was a room monitor for the handicapped students in the morning before school. One of the kids who was blind was acting up. I went over to see what was going on and to stop the commotion. Dude got mad at me and, I quote "Shut up kid! I bet your ugly!" Pretty much, I just laughed it off and sat him down and I'm sure I said something in return, but can't remember. But that just caught me off guard.

"You talk like you're in a dubbed anime"

It was not directed at me, but my favorite is "You look like when you die, you drop BASIC loot!"

One Christmas, I got a card from Santa. It said “Tidy your room”

"You look like you come from sturdy Norwegian stock". I don't even know what that means

Years ago, an elderly lady told me, " You have an unusual face." Gee, is there such a thing as a "usual" face?

At times, I have been called 'A Wealth of Useless Knowledge'. Not sure if it was intended as an insult, though. However, in future, I plan to start making use of the 'Shakespearean Insult Kit' -

Shakespearean Insult Kit –
Combine one word from each column, prefaced with ‘Thou’:
Column 1 Column 2 Column 3
artless base-court apple-john
bawdy bat-fowling baggage
beslubbering beef-witted barnacle
bootless beetle-headed bladder
churlish boil-brained boar-pig
cockered clapper-clawed bugbear
clouted clay-brained bum-bailey
craven common-kissing canker-blossom
currish crook-pated clack-dish
dankish dismal-dreaming clotpole
dissembling dizzy-eyed codpiece
droning dog-hearted coxcomb
errant dread-bolted death-token
fawning earth-vexing dewberry
fobbing elf-skinned flap-dragon
froward fat-kidneyed flax-wench
frothy fen-sucked flirt-gill
gleeking flap-mouthed foot-licker
goatish fly-bitten fustilarian
gorbellied folly-fallen giglet
impertinent fool-born gudgeon
infectious full-gorged haggard
jarring guts-griping harpy
loggerheaded half-faced hedge-pig
lumpish hasty-witted horn-beast
mammering hedge-born hugger-mugger
mangled hell-hated joithead
pestiferous mewling quim

Hetero cis female and my "fave" was when a guy i turned down for a date snarled, "Do you have gender identity issues?!"

No. He, however, had courtesy issues. :-)

Someone in band came up to me and was like 'hey crow you look like you drink warm water' which was both deeply confusing and incredibly hurtful

Getting called "homeschooler" in a derogatory manner.

Bro, if I was ashamed of how I was schooled, I'd try harder to hide it.

so i recently changed my hair color again, its bright red and i have a shadow root, this one kid sees me with it and goes "EWWWW ITS ADAM LAMBERT BUT MORE EMO"

that was supposed to be a stupid insult, but im honored to be Adam Lambert :) but it was an odd one because ive never heard of that one before. bet you hes never actually heard of his stuff tho

Once somebody told me that I looked like If Emma Watson and Ted Bundy had a kid and I honestly didn't know whether I should laugh or cry.

in fourth grade it was clean up time because the school day was almost over. everyone had a cleanup job. one girl had trash duty where she walked around with a trashcan and put things inside. she walked up to me and said im putting all the trash from the classroom in this trash can, get in. the funny thing was that i zoned out and didn't realize what she said so i just said sure.

At least I’m not a pimply shrek

Not an insult, but a backhanded compliment from my favorite nurse. He told me "You are like an ox in a donkeys body." I replied "thanks?" He laughed and said "You know what I mean." I was the hardest working CNA on our floor. Still my favorite backhanded compliment that I've ever received.

I have been a nurse going on 31 years this year. For the most part I have worked in geriatrics, i.e. nursing homes. I've heard stories about some hospital patients being entitled but you can get entitled nursing home residents on occasion.
I lived in the Tampa Bay area of Florida for 5 years and I worked in a nursing home there on the 3pm-11pm shift and it was one of the best places I have ever worked and I have a lot of funny stories from working there but I rate this story one of the best. One evening I was passing my medications and one lady was being just plain nasty and mean and I wasn't having it. I usually don't let the residents get to me but I was having a bad day and while I can't remember our complete conversation she said something to me and I was being sarcastic back and she said "well you're a b!±ch" and without skipping a beat I said "that won't be the first time I've been called that and it certainly won't be the last" and walked away as her jaw dropped as she was expecting a fight from me but I was NOT going to indulge her that day 🤣🤣🤣🤣