Hey Pandas, What Screams "I'm A Bad Parent?" (Closed)

Having five kids when you can only afford one

When a parent trades their parental rights for a carton of cigarettes while they are in jail.

I think that one big thing is not understanding moderation. Saying "No sugar, ever" is not going to be beneficial in the long run, but neither is "Eat whatever you want, whenever you want". Having unreasonable, written-in-stone rules isn't going to teach a child responsibility, good habits, or independence, it is going to teach rebellion and deception. On the other hand, having no rules can lead to many dangerous situations. A bad parent will probably fall to either side of this tightrope. A good parent can allow the rules to adapt to the child's needs.

When their kids cower when their parents are angry or when they hide to cry.

When they tell their kids who the favorite is. (Not even joking about it)

When their kids think money is the most important thing in the world, even more important than love, and family.

When they don't believe mental illnesses are legitimate. They think they're either fake or an excuse.

Obvious, but when theyre kids are going hungry and they keep buying alcohol. "There's food money and then there's alcohol money"

Body shaming your kid, calling them fat until they develop an eating disorder.

Gaslighting.

Verbal/mental/emotional abuse, physical abuse. Spanking is one thing; spraining your wrist because you're spanking so hard you break the paddle then keep going is another.

Making your child feel like they're never good enough.

Picking favorites (and making it obvious to people outside of the family unit who you prefer).

Raising your kid in fear and abuse, convincing them it's normal, and making them believe they'll never be a "good kid" if they report said abuse to the police.

Letting them get whatever they want

when you spend all day in a bar or drinking while your kids go cold and hungry

When ur parents constantly want the best for you, but it makes you upset

Dissolving powdered Jello and water in a bottle so the baby will "sleep through the night because they are full". I was told this from people in southern Indiana!

Conditional affection.

I'd say that ejecting your children off of Niagara Falls makes you a pretty bad parent.

Going on your phone constantly.

If your child is in HS, you should let them get their friend’s numbers, or else they will be left out.

Your kids curse (especially if in public) and/or are disrespectful to authority figures (especially teachers, and when said authority figure is being reasonable and is in the right) just to look "cool". Poor etiquette in general.

Personal story here but I had a neighbor whose younger kids were awful, they were mean, stole, and a whole bunch of other things. I was a kid at my friend's house when they just casually walked in and raided the fridge while her mom was in the shower. Whenever their parents were told about the bad things they did their mom would always yell 'My kids can do no wrong!" The oldest girl was actually a sweet and responsible, yet meek person constantly apologizing for her family. I hope she's doing well and got outta there.

Not particularly bad, but when they don't know basic things like when's your birthday, what's you like etc🤚

Yelling at your kid over a grade when they're trying their hardest and not listening to what they're saying so often that they get to the point of going to anyone else before you when they need help with something and they stop feeling anything whenever they are yelled at. Also, honorable mention, feeling like they can't tell you anything and are scared of you looking through their phone even when they aren't doing anything wrong. Speaking completely from experience on all of this. If you're a parent, please be gentle with your kids to prevent all of this and remind them that you should be their #1 and they can trust you.

The parent themself screaming it

Not correcting your rude and naughty little child. Pretending you don't notice.

People who say 'my parents were bad, I will do everything opposite of what they did.' That's not a real parenting strategy (also, if they actually succeed, they'll mess their kid up in opposite but equally bad ways).