Hey Pandas, What Is The Weirdest Thing You Have Ever Overheard?

Passed two ladies in the street.
"There's that puddle I was telling you about."

I will not specify but it involved teenage boys and ‘staying in practice.’

I heard someone say that they were going to get someone a ribbon for Christmas

Intimacy between my mother and her boyfriend.

I am fourteen years old and I have heard this multiple times.

someone lecturing their son about ghost protection. i was so weirded out

"God asked my dad if he wanted a gay son or a fat daughter, and he got both" - guy behind me in line at a restaurant

“everything it sexier without legs and arms”

for context, it was a conversation about lizards and snakes

Info
I was at a restaurant around a year ago and the people infront of is were getting to go.

Cashier
"Why aren't you tipping me? I served you! That is so rude of you"

When I was a kid I overheard another kid earnestly telling his little friend that 'I can run a circle as fast as a cat'. For whatever reason, that has stayed with me. In fact, that's probably the only thing I learned in school. That, and how $hit at learning I am.