Hey Pandas, What Is The Best Insult You've Ever Heard? (Closed)

If your brains were dynamite, there wouldn't be enough to blow your hat off. >:)

Winston Churchill's insult to Lady Astor.

Lady Astor: If you were my Husband I would poison your tea.

Churchill: If I were your husband I'd drink it.

such a classic burn.

I'd give you an ugly look but I see you already have one.

Cracks me up every time.

“Were your parents cousins, or did they just drop you on the head one time too many?”

There’s a certain word I don’t use because it is hurtful and insensitive to people with intellectual disabilities, but it is hard to refrain myself from those who are both hateful and stupid.

"I could eat alphabet soup and s**t better lyrics than that"
Johnny Mercer, after being asked his opinion about a particular song

My kid said this to me once, 'Go step in a puddle!' I couldn't get ahold of myself for hours...

Who pissed In your cereal?

bully: *say literally anything mean/rude*

me: no u

if u r ever in trouble, just bring out ol' reliable.

Not mine, I have to credit Lin-Manuel Miranda for this one:

Sittin’ there useless as two shits

We seem to have trouble communicating. Should I clap to let you know when I’m finished?

Overheard a 2 gentlemen arguing in Portugal:

Calado eras poeta.

Means: With your mouth shut, you're a Poet.

You're so dense, light bends around you.

Person 1: *makes depression joke*
Person 2: Well if you're so sad then just die
Person 1: Hunny if I wanted to die I would just jump from the very top of your ego down to your IQ level. Back off.

Sorry for the politics but ngl this is kinda funny:
*Word for word*
Clinton: It's just awfully good that a person with the temperament of Donald Trump is not in charge of the law in our country
Trump: Yea, because you'd be in jail

“I do desire we may be better strangers.” - Shakespeare

“Your such a loser, that if you competed for the best loser you would get seccond”- Elmo from the tower le fence support discord server

"You must have been conceived anally because there is no way being such an asshole comes naturally"