Hey Pandas, What Are Some Bad Pickup Lines? (Closed)

Are you my anxiety meds? cause' i just can't get enough of you

Did you fall from Heaven? Because it looks like you landed on your face.

Are you my will to live? Cause' i've been looking for you my whole life

I ain't fred Flintstone but I'll make your bed rock

Observe the mating calls of the delusional:

1) Are you my homework? Because I wanna slam you on my desk and do you all night

2) on a scale of one to America, how free are you tonight?

Shout out to Stardust for commenting “North Korea” in response to the second one on the last thread about pickup lines. That made me laugh so hard

Are you a cow? 'cause I can't mooooove away from you.

Are you a pencil? cause' I want to erase your past and write our future

I have Four:

1) Are you from Mississippi? Cause you're the only miss who's p**s I'd sippy.
2) Are you from Tennessee? Cause you're the only ten I see.
3) Are you my computer, Cause you're hot
4) Can you hold something for me, *Hold out your hand* Can you hold, my hand?

Hopefully, none of these get you smacked, Good Luck(As always Go Hololive!)

From my friend;
Hey girl, are you a lightbulb? Because i really want to put you in my mouth but i probably shouldn't.
Are you an onion? Cause I want to take a bite of you!!
Are you a table? Because I want to lick you
Are you a microwave? Because you spin me right round baby right round
Are you a bicycle? Cause I wanna ride u

None of these are mine, they're all just funny s**t one of my friends comes up with

You’re a 9/10, because I’m the only 1 u need 🥴

R u looking for a stud? Cause I've got the std and all I need is u

hey you are a theif you stole my heart! but guess what you can have it

Are you a parking ticket? ‘Cause you’ve got ‘fine’ written all over you.

Did you sit on a pile of sugar? Because you have a sweet a*s.

Are you my homework? Cause I should be doing ya rn but I'm not

Heard these two this week:
Are you a Rubiks cube? Cause the more I play with you, the harder I get

And this one was very questionable and pointless but:
Are you from north Carolina? Let's f**k/I like your socks. Let's f**k/If two plus two if four, let's f**k

Don't question the third one, my friend is weird

I heard you’re into bad boys/girls. Luckily for you, I’m bad at everything

This one was actually said to me in a bar!

Hey, you wanna go somewhere and f**k?

I like to make up pickup lines that hardly make any sense, so watch and learn. These are brand fresh and new for you, Bored Panda. Are you frayed thread? Because I just can't get you through the needle and truthfully this is what is going to kill me. Are you a door handle? Because you seem to keep catching on my clothes. Are you a muddy shoe? Because I'd like to scrape you until you're clean. I haven't had the motivation to drink water in three days and I'm really thirsty...care to help a fellow out? If I were a pine tree, I'd be dropping cones on you right about now.

You're no oil painting, but there's something about you. (From a balding, pudgy, short guy - I'm tall, slim and thick hair)

I have a few , some slightly dirty…

Are you mrs claus bc I would let you jingle my bells any day…

Are you a land mine bc I sure wanna step on u

Are you an Apache helicopter bc I would let you bomb me any day

Are you a video game bc you just keep cheating