i feel like im going no were. i finally see that the girl i was with , just treated me like crap. and i was a a**hole to my friends when they tried to show me she was gunna hurt me. then my daily life has just spiraled out of control. i have no job , no car. i litterly have no one. im geting tired of these. and i know there are better things to do but all i ever think about is why every one has left me. like i cant figure it out . my owen parents didn't even love me. like the other day someone mentioned god. and i almost laughed like if there is a god why would i have been beaten, raped , abused , neglected , abandoned, and get stuck with mental illness and a want to feel high. also im not a bad person , yes i did bad things but i changed , stop looking at me like im just a criminal. im i asking to mutch to be happy and live normally.
DEC 21, 2020