Hey Pandas, Do You Have Fear Of Something?

This ones going to be hard to understand but ever sense I was little I have been extremely afraid of losing control over my own thoughts and words. Basically I’m absolutely terrified of alcohol and drugs. My parents weren’t crazy with drugs or drinking or anything they are really confused by this since I have no reading to be scared of it. I can’t even be in a room with someone who I suspect might be slightly intoxicated without almost having a panic attack so normally at parties I have to hide because theirs always that one crazy family member or friend. I don’t know what will happen the day I’m told I have to get wisdom teeth removed or something where they have to give me any slight sedative I know this makes me sound crazy but I’d rather die than ever have anything like this happen to me, and if my parents were to force me to get any kind of surgery and get sedated I fear I might kill myself.