Have We Tried Love Instead?

When I was younger, the possibility of loving one another as one loves him or herself seemed remote, unrealistic and I dare say, even undesirable. After all how could I love racist people, corrupt politicians, manipulative religious leaders, greedy entrepreneurs, a treacherous co-worker, an envious relative, child abusers and all those people who insist in disrespecting other fellow human beings on a small, medium and large scale?

While love is immensely challenging, I have come to realize that hate is actually impracticable. Hate is a parasite and as such its only goal is to kill its host. There’s much in this world that needs fixing but it seems ineffective to try to make our world right by poisoning ourselves thus perpetuating a cycle of hate, self-punishment and more hate.

Love on the other hand enlivens every one of our cells. Perhaps our actions will be exactly the same but depending on the force that sustains them - love or hate – we feel replenished or depleted. It’s not too difficult to figure out which force sustains us just by asking ourselves a few honest questions about why we do the things we do.

Switching from love to hate is not a mental decision. At that level, I think it’s just a pretty ineffective and ephemeral game of “convincing oneself.” We have to breathe love instead for long enough so that it can oxygenate our entire being. Paradoxically, I think we only get to experience the benefits of love when we are no longer “blackmailing” life and being a “loving creature” so that life will pay us back. In fact, that’s the key to love I guess, not expecting anything back. We must go beyond this deeply built-in paradigm of behaving well in order to get a reward if we are ever to experience true love which is by definition unconditional.

I think that to love each other as we love ourselves points towards developing this ability to interact with others without expecting anything in return. Others are not a means for us to get applause, recognition or money but they are an opportunity for us to exercise love. So perhaps it’s not so much about loving the people who inflict suffering on others but about loving the possibility to spread more love.

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