64 Halloween Conflicts That Prove Costumes Aren’t The Only Things That Can Be Scary

I’m going to host the event myself and I will do that for awhile.

In our family we rotate who hosts the family event. This Halloween party is being done by my son and everyone was invited but his sister. She (Amy) cheated on her long distance boyfriend about four months ago. I don’t approve what she did, it was messed up of her.

Now my son has taken her cheating personally, extremely personally. I had to tell him to shut up about it multiple times.

Now today I was talking with her and she didn’t know when the party was. I called up my son and he told me she isn’t invited. I told him I will not be going if everyone in the family is invited besides her. This is when the argument broke out. He called me some creative names for defending the slut of the family. I hung up after that.

I told my husband what happens and he is also not going now. My son is pissed and I am getting messages for not going to the party.

Edit this is a comment: He is 28 and she is 23. I have talked to him about it, he can’t stand sluts his exact words. He has never been cheated on from my knowledge.

She already did that ( apologized to the ex), and then they broke up. She didn’t hide it.

His attitude about this makes me think this will be a problem with him for a long time

I (14F) am born on Halloween and almost all of my birthday parties have been halloween themed. (I live in a country where trick or treating doesn't happen but parties occasionally do)

'Hannah' (15F) is a girl who joined our school beginning of this academic year so she hasn't been in the school for long. And didn't know about my birthday when she celebrated hers( important later)

So on Monday, I was sitting with my friends and the topic of what I wanted to do on my birthday came up and I said halloween party as usual. Suddenly, 'Hannah' speaks up and is like "no! You can't do that. You're copying me!" and I asked her why. She said that she had a Halloween themed birthday party in may (which is as far from October as possible) and that I should let her be the special one this year. I told her it was practically tradition for me to have a Halloween themed birthday cuz I'm actually born on said day.

(Now Keep in mind it really isn't a holiday in our country but people do know a bit about it but not that much.)

So she says, "just because your birthday falls on it this time doesn't mean you were born on it" and I'm just sitting there looking at her confused. Friend 1 asks her wth she's talking about. So she says " it falls on the last sunday of October. Just cuz you are born around that time doesn't mean that you have keep a party." And another friend is like "do you know anything about halloween?"

She basically refused to believe it doesn't change every year and kept on trying to convince me to have a normal birthday party. I kept refusing and she walked away saying that I'm just a copy cat. A friend said she was the one who copied me but I reminded them that Hannah didn't know about my birthday then.

Some of my friends tried to change my mind cuz she's new but others are happy to have two halloween parties in a year. I really don't want to change because last year I didn't get to celebrate cuz of the pandemic and so this year I was really excited for it. Also this is my last year in school and I'll prolly never meet these ppl again.

Edit: ok wow I have a LOT of birthday twins and now you guys have convinced me so I'm 99percent planning on having it

My college has an annual event where local kids can safely trick or treat in the dorms the day before Halloween. The students are required to buy their own candy and have to pray they don’t run out before the event is over, which happened to me last year.

So tonight was this event and I was pretty strict with the “one candy per kid” rule, but I was really uncomfortable when a parent would approach the door with a baby (and I mean less than 1-2 years old) and expect me to give them candy on their behalf. This happened with parents who had other, more appropriately aged kids with them too, which was I guess more understandable. But mainly it happened with parents who had nobody else but the baby- they would just show up to my door holding a costumed baby and a bag and said “say trick or treat!” as if they deserve something for that.

After this happening more than a few times, I decided to put my foot down and deny candy to kids who weren’t old enough (can’t walk, can’t hold their own bag, doesn’t know what’s going on). From that point on I said to everyone else that night: “We have limited candy and want to make sure the ‘big’ kids get some.”

I wound up getting some criticism from a few parents, some made shocked or disgusted faces and one couple even said they wanted to complain to the resident manager of my building, who is 100% on my side on this.

Am I the jerk for thinking that it’s wrong for parents to use their baby, who is too young to remember their first or second Halloween, to get free candy for themselves by trick or treating?

**EDIT: I’m definitely NOT against giving candy to teenagers. Hell, I’ve even seen a few of my fellow students trick or treating at this event! And I’m most definitely not bashing new parents for showing off their kid’s cute costume. My problem solely lies with parents taking advantage of us and using their costumed baby to get candy for themselves and then getting angry with me because I’m refusing to “give their kid” any candy.

As the title says this happened on Halloween. I'm 25M and 5 years ago my parents wanted to go to my sister's house for Halloween. At the time I was still living with them, and I wanted to go to a party a friend was hosting. But my parents were adamant that I go with them instead because they wanted us all to be together. I still wanted to go to my friend's party and my parents suggested a compromise in which I go to my sister's party first. Then my friend's. I figured it couldn't hurt to do both, so I agreed since I liked helping my nephews with trick or treating. And that year I was wearing an inflatable ninja costume I was really eager to have fun in.

Well I was ready and waiting in the costume for hours. And by the time we finally took the kids out, most houses stopped giving candy and there was hardly anybody walking around. And we only went around the block, that's it. Then when I wanted to go to my friend's house my parents guilted me into staying because they needed me as a designated driver. I would have driven them home first and then gone to my friend's party. But my parents just kept drinking and refused to leave. So I lost out on going the other party and cussed my parents out for making me miss it and not even being able to enjoy my Halloween. They just said that it was too late, and what could they do about it. They didn't even attempt to make it up to me.

I refused to speak with them later. So they confronted me and I said I didn't even want to look at them because they broke their promise. Then I said that unless they could somehow pull a new Halloween party with all my friends out of their asses, then they had completely screwed me over. Then I left before they could say anything else to me. My friends were nearly as upset as I was. But my sister told me off and said I was callous because she had wanted me there. Ever since that year I only spent Halloween with friends.

This year my parents begged me to go with them to my sister's instead. I asked why and they wanted me to drive them. So I refused and said they just wanted a designated driver. And they'd already screwed me over before and didn't even attempt to make it better back then. And I didn't wanna just sit around watching them get drunk with the only real highlight being helping kids trick or treat. I hung out with my friends and we had a blast with a farmyard party. But my sister called me up on Monday furious at me because our parents were pulled over on their way home and got a DUI, and that this would have never happened if I had driven them. And now most of the family is pissed at me.

So AITA for refusing to drive my parents to my sister's house for Halloween because of something they did 5 years ago?

I (35F) am the Stepmother to two lovely ten year old twin girls who I adore. I have been married to their father (38M) for five years and we dated for two years before that. I consider myself very close to them and we always have fun whenever they stay with me and their father.

They recently asked what kinds of movies I watched when I was their age so it led to me digging out some old classics most notedly the Parent Trap. Of all the older movies I showed them this one was their favourite I think they got a kick out of seeing a movie about twins. They even delighted in the fact that in their opinion I look like Meredith Blake (it's the hair I think no way am I as gorgeous as Elaine Hendrix). It has become an inside joke of us with me often putting on her voice and acting the part while they fall into hysterical giggles. My husband has even gotten into it and playing the clueless Nick when we get into this playful spirit.

The girls are staying with us for Halloween, they alternate who has them on holidays and whoever has them for Halloween is in charge of the costume. The girls asked if I would do a group costume with them I was touched and told them of course, and asked them what they wanted to do. I should have seen it coming, they wanted to do the Parent Trap, with them as the girls and me as Meredith. I found it harmless and agreed. My husband found it funny and said he'd even dress as Nick then.

I got a call from their Mother today telling me she'd heard of the costume and she didn't approve that she felt it wasn't appropriate. I at first was touched and assumed she worried about their stepmother being portrayed as a wicked gold digger and told her it was fine it was just an inside joke that had occurred that sparked this. That wasn't the issue, she didn't think it was appropriate for me to do a group costume with her daughters at all and that it was clearly lazy and I was forcing it as why else would her daughters want to do a costume from an old movie?

I got rather upset here but tried to stay calm on the phone and I told her she might not approve but it was harmless and i'd been in the girls life for 7 tears at this point. My husband who was in the room during the call could see I was getting upset so took the phone off of me and began to get into it with his ex-wife. Telling her that she could have all the issues she wanted but it was an entirely proper costume for their age and it had been the girls who suggested it. Reminding her it was up to him what they dressed as this year and he'd approved of it. I got him to calm down as he was getting upset and the call ended rather tersely.

I just feel awful about this whole thing and I wonder if I should just bow out of matching the girls in costume if it will prevent further problems. I just know this will be a bigger thing down the line.

Children involved are 3 and 4. Born in Canada, so far raised without any religious influence but neither parent is apposed to it. The father, lets call him Dave, and I have been separated since January 2021. Co-Parenting has been rocky at best. The relationship was riddled with emotional abuse, IMO Dave is a text book narcissist. Having finally settled in court, this is the first year that a custody agreement will dictate the division of holidays (alternating each year). This year, I am entitled to Halloween with our children. Please keep in mind, I have no knowledge of what a Diwali celebration entails and am going only on what Dave has informed me will take place. Forgive my ignorance or incorrect terms! (Additional info on Diwali celebrations are welcome!)

Dave approached me this morning to ask if I would trade years for Halloween - He would take the children this year and I would have them next. Dave explained that Diwali falls on Halloween this year and that his girlfriend celebrates. He stated that the children have been invited by her family to join in the celebrations. Dave stated that the children would be picked up from school, travel 20 minutes to their home where they will have dinner, do Puja #1 at 5:10pm, travel 1 hour to gf's families home, do Puja #2, have a snack, trick-or-treat and go to bed. They would then stay over night at the gf's families home to continue the Diwali celebration the following day.

Both October 31st and November 1st are my parenting days. Dave has not directly asked to have the children for Friday but in stating that they will sleep over and the celebration continues, it is presumed.

I am of the opinion that it is great for the children to experience other cultures and religions and welcome their participation in Diwali. However, the children loved Halloween last year and haven't stopped talking about it since! They picked out their costumes in august and tell anyone who will listen what they will be! I feel that with the travel and additional celebrations, it may make for a very rushed and tiring Halloween. I don't know how long Puja lasts but the time line does not appear to allow for much time to trick-or-treat. I do not want their Halloween experience compromised when they will ask again for another full year.

I have offered a solution to Dave that the kids would trick-or-treat as per usual but could spend Friday with the gf's family to celebrate Diwali. I also offered to drive the children the 1 hour to their family home, knowing that they will already be there and celebrating. This way, the children could experience both Halloween and Diwali.

Dave seems to think that I am trying to control his parenting and it should be a simple trade for Halloween this year for next. I feel that it is not simply a trade for this year and next because the children may miss out on the Halloween experience as a result of the switch.

AITA?

I know this seems like an obvious answer, but hear me out because I'm having some serious doubts now.

My fiance and I are trying to get married on Halloween of this year. Halloween is our favorite holiday and has been since we met and started dating 8 years ago in High Shcool. For a few years we talked about getting married and having a really elegant, gothic style wedding on Halloween, and we've been really excited to make that a reality finally.

Here's where I may be TA. My parents were teenagers when I was born, and 10 years later they both remarried and had my half-sibings, and now I'm the eldest of 6, with the age range of my siblings being from 4-13. At the same time, my aunts and uncles also started having kids, so I'm more than a decade of age of all my cousins as well, and there are a lot of them.

Obviously I want them all at the wedding, but as soon as all of them found out the date of the wedding they all got really upset. I thought that if we made the reception more fun and have a candy bar and dancing and fun, maybe even allow people to change into costumes after the ceremony, we could have a great compromise. However, this hasn't been the case. My aunts, uncles, and my parents want to go trick or treating with their kids, and put it all in my siblings and cousins heads that they wouldn't have their fun every year because I'm getting married that day. So now it doesn't even matter that I'm trying to accommodate, because I'm taking away the experience of trick or treating and dressing up around the neighborhood.

My fiance's family is older and is all for the Halloween wedding, so that's not an issue. But now I'm starting to feel bad because I feel like if we insist, our wedding day is going to be filled with disappointed family and nobody will have fun because they want to celebrate halloween their way. But this is a once in a lifetime event with the love of my life, and I want to share it with everyone we love.

WIBTA for insisting on this date?

My son is 9 years old. We went trick or treating like we usually do and the night was going well except when we got to a house that had a bowl of candy sitting on the porch It said "Take 2 please". He puts his whole hand in there and grabs about 6 pieces.

Of course I corrected him, and made him put 4 of them back, explaining be needed to leave some for the others. From then on he had an attitude, and the last straw was when I told him to stop grabbing so much candy from people and he screamed "No!".

We had only been out for about an hour so I took him right on home. Took his candy bag, dumped it in a bowl and told him to come sit outside on the porch with me. He objected of course, as kids came by and took handfuls of his candy. He complained they were taking too much and I told him that he shouldn't have done the same then.

His father came home from work, asked why he was in his room crying, to which I explained why. He said it was really cruel to give away the kids candy just because he was taking a little too much. I said he needs to learn to not be so greedy to which my husband said that "Its ok, it's Halloween".

He said I was being a jerk, and that I should cut some slack for the one holiday that kids get to pig out. I don't agree, although I figured I could've done this differently. AITA?

Edit: No, I did not give away the entire bowl. And even if I had, I would have had no problem providing him more once he learned his lesson and apologized.

Last Friday night I (37m) was hanging out with my daughter (10f) watching a movie. My wife (34f) was working late while our son (9m) was hanging out with his friend.

Around 8pm his friend's mom texted me letting me know that she was driving him home. I thanked her and then let my daughter know that her brother was on his way. She then suggested that we play a prank on him in which we jump out and scare him. I thought it would be a funny practical joke and--long story short--she and I ended up putting on scary Halloween masks, dimming the lights, and hiding behind a couch. I then texted his friend's mom and told her that his sister and I were watching a movie and to send him to the Family Room downstairs when he got home.

He got home and came in. We heard him come in and say "Hello?" and then come down the stairs. When he got close we jumped out at him and shouted.

Now; here's where I fully admit I messed up. I thought he'd just be startled for a second and then would laugh with us over the prank. But that's not what happened. We ended up frightening him WAY more than I'd anticipated. He first started running off and then ended up having a HUGE, trembling, crying, adrenaline dump for a long time. I felt really bad and so did his sister.

His mother came home not long after and ended up sitting with him, hugging and comforting him. Naturally she wasn't amused by my antics which I understand because--again--I screwed up.

However, she has stayed mad at me for all these days afterward. She will barely talk to me. I eventually got tired of it and told her that she needed to get over it. I screwed up but I didn't mean any harm. I just way underestimated how much our prank would scare our son. I also think that our daughter is seeing how she is treating me over it and is being made to feel way too bad over her idea that was just playful; not bad-natured. But she just says that I "should have known better" and won't seem to forgive me.

I get it; she's always been a complete mama bear. But it's not as if I don't love our kids, too. Was my prank honestly so beyond that pale that I deserve to keep being punished over it?

I (29F) am divorced with an 9 year old daughter. My daughter’s father (32M) has been in a relationship with a woman named Stephanie for about 6 months now. She has two younger daughters (ages 4&5).

My ex-husband and I have had many conversations about how to ease my own child into their new “blended family” by making sure that she still has lots of time with her dad, not combining every single special event with the other kids, and keeping lines of communication open. Overall, the introduction has been positive, but my daughter has mentioned that the younger children can be overwhelming and sometimes annoying. However, despite the conversations, every single special event has been blended, for lack of a better word.

We’re coming up on Halloween and my daughter has trick or treating plans with her best friend and her family. Halloween is my custody time.

My ex-husband asked if he could come and bring his new girlfriend and her children. I said no, as I wanted my daughter to be able to have time with her friend without having the other little kids in tow. They are not officially her siblings in any way, and I feel that she deserves protected time just for her.

My ex husband says that I am purposely excluding his new girlfriend and that I should be more concerned that she doesn’t have many friends or others to go out with on that evening. I feel like that is not my problem and I am advocating for my own child without having her feel like she needs to people please or feel guilty. I am not asking my daughter her opinion as I do not want her to feel burdened with any guilt. I did also invite them to the Halloween event at her school that same week to help initiate balance.

AITAH?

I'm a 50-year-old man.

My wife and I have a son and a daughter. My daughter married one of my son's best friends. We took him in when he was 15 and treated him like one of our own. He was kicked out of his father's home, and we took care of him like our own. My daughter fell in love with him and they got married right out of high school. He went to college, while she took care of their daughter.

My daughter was resentful of the fact that she had to give up her dreams, and this created problems in their relationship. Her husband ended up having an affair and siring an illegitimate child. The mother was an addict and lost custody.

After months of back and forth, my daughter decided to reconcile with her husband. We were not happy with her decision but decided to not let our disappointment show when she brought him around. We treated him the same.

7 years go by, and last month my daughter decided that she cannot give her marriage a chance. I think we all knew that she was ashamed of her decision to reconcile. It came as a shock to my son in law because they were expecting another baby (which my daughter has decided to abort).

She also told us she is moving on and is already dating one of my friends' sons, a widower with a daughter my granddaughter's age and they are good friends.

She has known him since they were both kids and I'm more than happy about her finding love.

This Halloween, she brought her new boyfriend to the celebration and we welcomed him wholeheartedly. And in the pictures in the clear that they were acting like a couple.

My son in law (soon to be former SIL) showed up to my office and accused me of encouraging the break up of his family when he was trying hard to save it. He was also disappointed that I didn't invite his 7-year-old daughter (His daughter went to her grandparents. So I don't understand the accusations)

I understand that being alone on Halloween for the first time in two decades must have felt bad, but he is no longer my daughter's husband. My son also cut him out of his life.

AITA for supporting my daughter in her decision and maintaining boundaries with her ex?

Around Halloween 2019 I (23f) got my daughter (now 5f) a pair of little red horns attached to hair clips. She has worn then almost every day since they are her favourite thing in the world. Last night we went on a social distance safe truck or treat our neighbourhood set up with my ex(35m). She wanted to stay at his house for the night so she could be with her step brother which I agreed to. This morning when I went to pick her up she was sobbing. When I finally got her to calm down she told me her dad took the horns and said she could have them back next October. Obviously I was pissed and demanded he give me back the horns and he told me she’s gonna get made fun of and how they make his mother upset because her granddaughter is “in love with devil horns she’s gonna worship him one day” and how I’m a bad mother for letting her wear them. It was honestly out of nowhere since he’s never commented on them before. AITA for letting my kid wear horns all year?

Update! Thank you so much for all the kind words! I had her decently young and am still trying to figure this Mom thing out but I’m so glad I made the right choice. We did get her OG pair back after he took them which seemed to be something I didn’t quite communicate in the post but we also ordered her a couple of new pairs of horns plus some other cute Halloween hair clips she loves! We have also started watching star vs the forces of evil and she loved it! Thank you so much for suggesting that show! As for ex he is on thin ice and I had a talk with him after she went to sleep and told him that if he cannot get over her wearing horns then he can just not see her unless she wants to see him.

My (F36) brother (M32) lives in the US. We are from the South of India. He recently married my SIL (F31) there. She is a US citizen and catholic. We haven't met her in person till now. We were supposed to go their wedding in the USA last year when "that which must not be named" happened. They postponed their wedding to April of this year, but we couldn't go as we were under the full blast of the 2nd wave. Anyhow we urged them to go ahead with the wedding and we attended via zoom.

They have now planned to visit us in India from mid October to mid November. They will be staying in a hotel and attending family get togethers including my parents Diwali lunch (4th Nov) when they would be introduced to a large part of the extended family (all vax + tested)

Last week we were having a video call where my SIL told me she is super excited to celebrate Halloween with my Kids (F 7 and 5). I told her sure, we can plan a party with some friends and have some spooky themed stuff. She said, she wants to dress up and take my girls out for some Trick or Treat as auntie-niece time. I told her that here in India no one does that and people would have no clue why you are knocking on their door, let alone have chocolates or sweets ready. What I could do is, inform a few neighbours and friends, buy them sweets ahead and then take her+kids specifically to those houses. She got a bit irritated and told me to forget about it. I was a bit taken aback, but dropped it. I started asking about what she would like to wear for the Diwali lunch. Its an important festival for us and we believe in wearing new clothes that day. She said she'd wear the same dress she wore for her reception (a short white dress). I told her in India, white is worn by widows (though this is now outdated) and wearing new clothes is an important sentiment and we would like to get her something new (as a gift). Maybe an Indian Salwar or saree or if she is uncomfortable, a full length dress. She would meet a lot of elders in our family and we would like her to dress a bit conservatively as they would not be comfortable.

She totally blew up and told me that If I was going to be so pushy, she won't come to the Diwali lunch at all and if she can't dress up for Halloween then she won't dress up for a pagan thing and she said many other things which were rude about our culture. I was upset as I felt that I had done nothing to warrant such a reaction. I got angry and told her if Diwali was pagan, so was Halloween. She cut the call and hasn't spoken to me since. Apparently she complained to my mother, as mom called me and told me that she was our guest and we shouldn't insult her and told me to apologise. I feel bad and like an TA now. I don't want her first experience of our culture to be sour or ruin my parents' Diwali. Also I don't know much about US culture. So, AITA?

My daughter, Emma (11F), is planning her Halloween party. We’ve invited most of the girls in her class, since they’re all pretty close and she’s known many of them for years. However, there’s one girl in her class, let’s call her Lily, who’s known as the class clown. She is new this year. My daughter greatly dislikes her and made it clear she doesn’t wish to invite her. I am fine with that, she is in middle school and can pick the guest list

Lily’s mom found out about the party (I’m guessing from another parent) and reached out to me, asking why her daughter wasn’t invited when most of the girls from their class were. She asked me to reconsider and invite Lily to avoid making her feel left out especially since they are new to the school.

I told her that my daughter picked the guest list and she isn’t close to your daughter. She reiterated that she should be invited since most of the girls in the class are. I told her no again. She asked why and I told her the truth. That my daughter doesn’t like your daughter and finds her annoying. That she is the class clown and disruptive and my daughter doesn’t wish to deal with her outside of school

The mom called me an jerk and other parents are contacting me. Some saying I a in the right and others saying to invite her

So this just happened and I am posting this for a third opinion. Also this was done on mobile so sorry for any issues.

A side note: I am a full time college student and a part time worker so seeing my friends is a rare occurrence. We had to start planning this party weeks in advance so we could make sure people could come.

I (18F) and my friend (18M) were planning a Halloween party several weeks ago and I suggested that we held it at my place. It seemed like the ideal place since it had hard floors, single story, friends were familiar with it, and it was overall the best place to have the party. He agreed and I got the approval from my parents to host the party here.

About two weeks ago my parents told me out of the blue that I was no longer allowed to host the party. They said it was because the house was not clean to my mothers standard even though I was not home all day and my brothers made the messes she was complaining about. I claimed that this was unfair since I didn’t make the mess and they shouldn’t expect me to clean the house even if I am not home, but they persisted.

I then texted my friend and he said he could host the party at his place and that there was nothing to worry about. I was joyed and I told my family that the party was still on.

Now my parents know that I am not a bad kid. I haven’t done any substance use ever and I have a 4.0. But my friend is different. So they tried to change my plans.

“What if you held the party outside here?”

“You could just put a projector outside and play outside”

“We don’t want you in a party with drinkers”

I deflected that and said that we couldn’t do anything outside and that we already changed locations.

So it’s today and my parents have their own party going on here, and they told me to clean the house today while they went out. Long story short, I only vacuumed and put my stuff away. When they got home though they were mad.

They tried to take my phone away and told me that I was awful for not preparing the house for their guests. I said that it was unfair that I had to clean a house for guests I didn’t invite and that I wouldn’t even see on Halloween. I am currently in my bedroom contemplating and I now here I am. AITA

Before you freak out, I’m in a manual wheelchair. I was paralyzed from the waist down when I was 4, so to my memory, I’ve been this way my entire life. With my parenting, I learned how to be grateful, independent, how to adapt, and that my disability doesn’t hold me back from anything.

I was taught that everything in life happens for a reason, and being paralyzed honestly just made me stronger physically and mentally than I would have been. I make jokes all the time about my wheelchair because it’s who I am, it’s funny, and there’s no use in being sad and depressed about not being able to walk.

—

So for Halloween last year, I decided to dress up as a handicap sign. I used a large cardboard square and painted it blue on both sides. I used white tape to make the symbol on one side and then used battery powered lights to outline the symbol. Then I dressed all in white to be the other side.

I thought it was absolutely hilarious, but I recently told my best friend about it and he told me it was rude and I shouldn’t have done that. He says not everyone understands life with a disability and that is why stereotypes are often placed on me. He says I need to be more understanding of their perspectives and that it wasn’t right for me to make others feel uncomfortable like that.

My (21 female) boyfriend (20 male) does not like my Halloween costume. Halloween is coming up and my friends and I decided that we wanted to dress up as fairies. Halloween is the one day that it is okay for people to dress scandalously and we were taking full advantage. My friends and I ordered lace bodysuits with different patterns. Mine specifically was green with gold trim and butterflies all over it (very cute). The whole outfit consists of the bodysuit, sheer tights, plastic leaves on vines, jewelry, sandals, wings, and pointed ears. I told my boyfriend about my Halloween costume and he immediately said that he does not want me wearing the costume. I told him that he has no say in what I wear. He was not happy and told me that I should have asked him about my costume before purchasing it. He kept saying that I am disrespecting him by wearing this outfit in front of other people even though he would be with me the entire night. I finally told him that I do not care about his opinion on my outfit choice and that I would be wearing it anyway. He and I can usually settle and argument pretty quickly but this one has lasted for a few days. I still do not think that he should have any say on what I wear and I still plan to wear the fairy costume however, I fear that I was too outspoken. AITA?

We’re both 32, married for 3 years. We finally just bought a house, in Denver, CO. Meaning $$$. On top of that we’re making some minor updates, so money is tight.

Husband, Pete, is one of those people who has a thing about being the “cool” house on Halloween. Giving out the full-sized candy bars, being “cool” and “in the know” and giving parents beer or something, over the top decorations, etc.

I’m not AGAINST decorating, giving out candy, etc. I love seeing kids in costumes. But I’m just not into all the excessive spending and the whole meme-y “spooky season” thing. I think $50 for a few bags of candy and some cobwebs/spiders and maybe a pumpkin or two are fine for this year.

However, Pete wanted to go all out. He wanted to get that huge skeleton, all the little ones, etc. Get hundreds of full sized bars, cases of beer, etc. He got frustrated that I had no interest, and then finally I told him:

“If you want to do all this, you can do it out of your own fun/personal budget for the month, but we have more important things to save our joint money for right now.”

He got upset because he doesn’t HAVE the money he would need, since he already spent the majority of it on his video gaming hobby.

I said that we can do something bigger next year if he really needed to prove himself. Plus we have no way of knowing how into the whole song and dance people get in this neighborhood. The last thing we need is a ton of candy bars sitting around, I’m already barely squeezing into my size 6 jeans lately.

So, I (27F) have the honor to be the stepmother of a sweet, imaginative, and wonderful little girl (6). Her father and I get her every other weekend at the moment and she lives with her mother and stepdad the rest of the time. We alternate holidays every year. (I.e. she was at her moms last year for Halloween, so she will be with us this year)

One day, about 2 weeks ago, I was driving her back to our house and the topic of what she wants to be for Halloween came up. This little girl had a 10 year plan for what she wants to dress up as. She’s told me for a while now that she wants to be Ariel from the little mermaid this year. I told her that absolutely, we can do that!

Well, cut to yesterday, I’m driving her to our house after picking her up from her moms house and the topic of Halloween comes up again. (It’s her favorite holiday as well as my own) She all of a sudden says “Jacob (not real name of stepdad) Says that Halloween is for scary things only not cute things. That going as a mermaid was dumb!” And she said her mom agreed. Luckily we were at a red light, so I looked back at her. She was clearly upset and was starting to tear up. I was getting real upset with her. This is not the first time that her other parents have told her something was dumb or stupid for liking.

I told her that Halloween is the time of year when you can be anything you want! That’s the point! I told her that her idea was not stupid, and that she’ll be with us this year. So if she wants to go as Ariel or a barrel, we don’t care and she’s be cute no matter what! She thought that going as a “barrel” was a funny idea and it made her laugh. However, she still thinks that going as a mermaid is stupid and is now trying to think of something scary…

My heart hurts for her. But am I the jerk for going against her mothers feelings about Halloween? I always am afraid of overstepping boundaries in that department… My husband says not to worry because she’ll be with us, so she can pick whatever.

My friend (S) and his roommate were throwing a Halloween party. S called me a couple days before the party to chat and I mentioned what my costume was, and that I’d worked hard on it and was excited to finally wear it. S said he thought his girlfriend (D) was planning to wear a nearly identical costume. I thought this would be fun, and we could compare styles and have a laugh about the whole thing, take pictures together etc. The day before the party, S called me and asked if I could change my costume for the party.

Apparently D was pissed that I would try to “outshine her” (S’s words) and she told S that he needed to ensure I would not wear the same thing as her.

I said absolutely not, I’ve been working on my costume for a few weeks and spent a good amount of money to make it perfect (in my eyes). I said that I really didn’t want to lose out on having fun in something I’d worked hard on, and I didn’t have a ton of money to spend on a new costume. Not to mention most of the costume shops wouldn’t have a great selection the day before Halloween. S said he understood and would talk to D.

*as a note, D didn’t live with S and was not helping with hosting duties.

The party comes around and everyone is having a great time. After a few hours, I noticed D wasn’t there and asked S where she was…she was in S’s bedroom alone the whole time with the door locked. She finally came out four hours after the party started, only to see me and smash her drink/glass on the floor and then she started crying. It was a huge scene and basically ended the party.

I felt bad because i really could have gone out and bought a different costume, and I never meant to make her cry. So, AITA?