Baby showers are quite a recent tradition that celebrates the upcoming birth of a baby and allows family and friends to ‘shower’ the parents-to-be with attention, essential items, and gifts. Typically, these joyous occasions are hosted by close women of the mom-to-be. But now it’s becoming common for expecting women to throw these celebrations themselves. Even though they choose to take matters into their own hands, they still need all the help they can get, as throwing a baby shower while being heavily pregnant isn’t an easy task.
This brother offered all the support he could to his expecting sister planning her baby shower. However, as her demands grew, he lost his patience, which got him uninvited from the event altogether.
Scroll down to find the full story and a conversation with Katie Montell, a professional baby planner and founder of The Baby Planner, and Virginia Trafton Frischkorn, one of the top event planners in the US and CEO and founder of Partytrick, who kindly agreed to tell us more about planning baby showers.
When a mom-to-be takes it upon herself to host a baby shower, she needs all the help she can get
Image credits: freepik (not the actual photo)
This brother tried supporting his pregnant sister planning for her baby shower as much as possible but lost patience when her demands started growing
Image credits: zinkevych / freepik (not the actual photo)
Image credits: nolascol
How far is too far when it comes to asking for help from loved ones while preparing for a baby shower?
Image credits: peoplecreations / freepik (not the actual photo)
Katie Montell, a professional baby planner and founder of The Baby Planner, tells Bored Panda that traditionally, a baby shower is hosted by a close friend, sister, sister-in-law, aunt, or another close family member. "Often, as soon as the pregnancy is announced, someone will extend an offer to host. In some cases, multiple people may want to host, and they can either collaborate to plan the event together or host separate showers. If no one offers by the time the parents-to-be are around 15-20 weeks, they can subtly mention it to close friends or family members who may be willing to take the lead," she explains.
But as times and etiquette are changing, moms-to-be often take it upon themselves to host this joyous celebration. "These days, it’s perfectly acceptable for siblings, parents, or even the expectant parents themselves to take the lead—especially if they love to entertain! What matters most is that the celebration feels thoughtful and joyful for the parents-to-be," says Virginia Trafton Frischkorn, one of the top event planners in the US and CEO and founder of Partytrick.
Even though they might be thrilled to throw their own baby shower, moms-to-be still need all the help they can get, as running around planning an event while being 8-9 months pregnant is quite the challenge. But how far is too far when it comes to asking for help from loved ones while preparing for this occasion?
"Friends and family can help by handling RSVPs, setting up décor, organizing a game or activity, or curating a playlist. Many parents-to-be also appreciate help with food and drinks—whether that’s catering, a potluck-style setup, or a themed cocktail/mocktail bar. And, of course, letting someone else take care of the cleanup is always a great idea!" says Frischkorn.
Montell also suggests that multiple friends and family can offer to collaborate on planning and covering the costs and stay on top of gift organization and guest management.
A beautiful and meaningful baby shower doesn’t have to be expensive
Image credits: Bizon / freepik (not the actual photo)
The size of the baby shower often depends on the parent's-to-be preferences. It could be a more intimate celebration with 10-20 guests or a larger one with 30-50 guests and more.
"Typically, guests include close friends, family members, and sometimes coworkers, but the parents-to-be should consider the costs and logistics when finalizing the guest list. Couples' baby showers tend to have larger guest lists, which can increase the cost and complexity of the event," Montell told us.
Frischkorn believes that a beautiful and meaningful baby shower doesn’t have to be expensive. "The best celebrations focus on connection, not cost. A DIY approach—using digital invitations, at-home hosting, and creative (but simple!) décor—can be just as special as a lavish event. At Partytrick, we believe in smart planning: with the right blueprint, any celebration can feel elevated, no matter the budget," she says.
To keep the costs down if the host is working with a limited budget, Montell suggests thinking about hosting the celebration at home, planning to have the event at a non-meal time (in the afternoon), and having minimal games and prizes. "A beautiful and enjoyable baby shower is about celebrating the parents-to-be and bringing their loved ones together—it doesn’t have to break the bank!"
Lastly, Montell notes, "If parents-to-be don’t want a traditional baby shower, they can consider alternative celebrations like a nesting party (where guests help prepare their home for the baby), a sip & see (a post-birth gathering to meet the baby), or a sprinkle (a smaller shower for second or third-time parents). Also, if organizing a registry feels overwhelming, I offer baby registry consultation services to help parents build a list tailored to their needs and lifestyles!"
Most readers were on the brother's side, saying the sister was being ungrateful
Some thought it was the fault of both parties
