Relationships are something people won’t ever get enough advice on. Just like humans are complicated creatures that will never stop being the focus of numerous psychological, sociological, and other studies, such is and always will be the case for relationships as well.
Not too long ago, Bored Panda has recently covered red flags in relationships—you know, indicators that he or she is not the one. Well, now it’s time to switch it up and consider green flags in relationships.
Reddit user u/CircleBox2 went to r/AskReddit to ask the question what are some green flags early on in dating that the relationship should become serious? The post soon went viral, gaining nearly 70,000 upvotes with over 8,500 responses from people sharing advice and personal stories.
Bored Panda gathered the best responses and turned them into a list which you can check out below. And while you’re at it, why not comment and vote on the submissions you found most useful!
More Info: Reddit
#21
Noticing the other does not take themself too seriously. In the very very early days of dating my now-husband, we took a long road trip for a romantic getaway in Boston. The first night in town, expensive dinner in a famous seafood restaurant. The server brings the bill and takes my date's credit card. Server comes back with the news that the credit card was declined. Both he and I burst out laughing at the same moment. That was my green flag!
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61points
#22
u/FrogInSnow:
He/she remembers small details from your conversations. It means they pay attention to you and what your interests are.
He/she remembers small details from your conversations. It means they pay attention to you and what your interests are.
u/scarrlet responded:
Every year at Christmas for at least the first five years of our relationship, my now-fiance got me at least one little gift he called a "listening gift." The first year it was a Kindle case--I had told him offhand I had an embarrassingly ugly fangirly Kindle case my mom had gotten me off CafePress, but I felt obligated to use it because I didn't want to hurt her feelings when it was a well meaning gift. So he got me a Kindle sleeve and said, "There, now you can tell her you have to use this one because your boyfriend got it for you." One year it was, "Four months ago, you mentioned that your family's copy of Jurassic Park was one that was taped off of TV in the 90's so it had 90's commercial breaks, so I got you Jurassic Park on DVD." It was really sweet and the listening gift was always my favorite, and also the hardest to explain to people when I gushed about it ("No, you don't get it, he got me a Kindle case!").
Every year at Christmas for at least the first five years of our relationship, my now-fiance got me at least one little gift he called a "listening gift." The first year it was a Kindle case--I had told him offhand I had an embarrassingly ugly fangirly Kindle case my mom had gotten me off CafePress, but I felt obligated to use it because I didn't want to hurt her feelings when it was a well meaning gift. So he got me a Kindle sleeve and said, "There, now you can tell her you have to use this one because your boyfriend got it for you." One year it was, "Four months ago, you mentioned that your family's copy of Jurassic Park was one that was taped off of TV in the 90's so it had 90's commercial breaks, so I got you Jurassic Park on DVD." It was really sweet and the listening gift was always my favorite, and also the hardest to explain to people when I gushed about it ("No, you don't get it, he got me a Kindle case!").
He is still very thoughtful but we've been together so long that I don't think he feels the need to prove he listens to me with one specific gift every holiday. He's still an awesome gift giver.
60points
#23
u/BeachTimePlz:
Encouraging growth, but doesn't try to change your foundation.
Encouraging growth, but doesn't try to change your foundation.
u/awomanhasnoname666 responded:
My (now) husband is 100% the reason I decided to go to college at 25. He believed in me and encouraged me so much or I’d have never done it... I kinda just did it on a whim too. It ended up being a quick decision over the summer. I’ll be a senior next semester and applying to law schools and he has been so supportive, encouraging, and helpful this entire time. Honestly, had I had the support from my family I’d probably already have been through college. I’m lucky I found him.
My (now) husband is 100% the reason I decided to go to college at 25. He believed in me and encouraged me so much or I’d have never done it... I kinda just did it on a whim too. It ended up being a quick decision over the summer. I’ll be a senior next semester and applying to law schools and he has been so supportive, encouraging, and helpful this entire time. Honestly, had I had the support from my family I’d probably already have been through college. I’m lucky I found him.
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52points
#24
On my first date with my future spouse, we had planned to spend some time together, then go get a bite and be done by evening. When the date was supposed to end, i invited her for a walking tour of my campus. When that was supposed to end, she invited me on a tour of hers. When that was supposed to end, she asked if I'd ever walked a pretty nearby neighbourhood, and we walked there. It was now about 11pm, i offered to walk her home. I went to walk home, she invited me in for tea. We sat in her living room, sometimes in long stretches of blissfully relaxing silence just smiling, and i wasn't on my way home until 2 am, 8 hours after the date was meant to have ended.
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50points
#25
u/Alonso81687:
Being weird together after only a couple of dates. It has taken me forever with most. But if I'm able to open up and be silly then I know it's a really good sign as I'm an introvert and incredibly shy around someone new, especially someone I see as a partner.
Being weird together after only a couple of dates. It has taken me forever with most. But if I'm able to open up and be silly then I know it's a really good sign as I'm an introvert and incredibly shy around someone new, especially someone I see as a partner.
u/browniestastevgood responded:
Only a few people outside of family know the true depths of my silly. Whenever they meet my other friends they get a bit confused about why people would think I'm a serious no-nonsense type of person. Or the other people are so very shocked to catch a glimpse of me goofing off.
Only a few people outside of family know the true depths of my silly. Whenever they meet my other friends they get a bit confused about why people would think I'm a serious no-nonsense type of person. Or the other people are so very shocked to catch a glimpse of me goofing off.
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49points
#26
They're curious about you. It's not just about the flow of a given conversation, it's about having genuine, enthusiastic interest in you and the things you care about. It doesn't mean they have to like the same things you like, but they should be able to engage with you even when it's not their "thing".
They have their own people. They don't need to rely on you completely for emotional support, because they have other meaningful relationships they could turn to. They do rely on you often, but they know when to give you some breathing room when they know you're having a tough time and turn to someone else for support.
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46points
#27
u/literallynorealplan:
They don’t push their preferences on you and pressure you to maintain them
They don’t push their preferences on you and pressure you to maintain them
u/sohcgt96 responded:
My wife and I have... about 20-30% crossover in our tastes in music.
My wife and I have... about 20-30% crossover in our tastes in music.
Neither of us try and change each other's minds, we'll show each other cool stuff in the crossover area, but the outside areas get left alone. She won't subject me to stuff I find sleepy or nauseating and I won't subject her to things she finds terrifying and overstimulating.
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41points
#28
u/Random1name9:
Did they return their shopping cart to the cart return after grocery shopping? I stand by shopping cart theory as a good indicator of a person's moral compass.
Did they return their shopping cart to the cart return after grocery shopping? I stand by shopping cart theory as a good indicator of a person's moral compass.
u/cuticle_cream responded:
I recently moved to South Florida. No one - and I really do mean no one - takes their cart to the corral or back to the store. I’ve locked eyes with people as they just push them into an empty parking spot. It boggles my mind. I always get thanked by staff when I bring my cart back.
I recently moved to South Florida. No one - and I really do mean no one - takes their cart to the corral or back to the store. I’ve locked eyes with people as they just push them into an empty parking spot. It boggles my mind. I always get thanked by staff when I bring my cart back.
34points
#29
u/RNN2734:
They get your humor and laugh at the jokes you tell.
They get your humor and laugh at the jokes you tell.
u/UnsettlingAura responded:
My boyfriend and I have a dark sense of humor; I used to be super sensitive but I've lightened up a lot after dating him. The other day he and I were washing dishes together and his mother mentioned that his sister was on antidepressants. My boyfriend, who had attempted to kill himself in the past, and neither his sister nor mother knew about it, responded that that was understandable. I whispered to him in my best James Franco voice "first time?"
My boyfriend and I have a dark sense of humor; I used to be super sensitive but I've lightened up a lot after dating him. The other day he and I were washing dishes together and his mother mentioned that his sister was on antidepressants. My boyfriend, who had attempted to kill himself in the past, and neither his sister nor mother knew about it, responded that that was understandable. I whispered to him in my best James Franco voice "first time?"
34points
#30
u/PM_Me_UrRightNipple:
If you set a boundary and they respect it.
If you set a boundary and they respect it.
If you say that you are more comfortable meeting them at the date location after they offer you a ride they shouldn’t insist on picking you up.
u/sunbear2525 responded:
I met my husband on a dating app. I was using a very obvious pseudonym. He asked me if that was my real name, I said "No, I have a very unusual given name and finding me IRL would be very simple. " his reply was "That makes sense" and did not ask or bring it up again. So many men got frustrated or would just keep asking.
I met my husband on a dating app. I was using a very obvious pseudonym. He asked me if that was my real name, I said "No, I have a very unusual given name and finding me IRL would be very simple. " his reply was "That makes sense" and did not ask or bring it up again. So many men got frustrated or would just keep asking.
I did tell him before or first date and now or cat is named Artful in honor of my former identity.annoyed with each other.
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33points
