Relationships are never easy. Finding a person you can fully trust and rely on requires a lot of emotional strength and might cost you your nervous system. The world is full of folks with their own quirks, and not everyone tends to show all their toxic character traits in those honeymoon stages when everything is so easygoing and lovey-dovey.
There is an infamous phenomenon called "nice guy syndrome": men that frequently complain about being unlucky in love, despite their allegedly charming persona who, in fact, turn out to be significantly dreadful human beings. They are usually unbearably clingy and manipulative with their partners – when not in a relationship, they constantly get friend-zoned and love to blame the rejection on women worshipping bad guys only.
This user took it to one of Reddit's communities and asked fellow female readers to share their stories about dating those self-proclaimed "nice guys". The post received over 20K upvotes and 9.3K worth of spine-chilling and rarely happy stories.
More info: Reddit
#21
Regardless of how many times I said I wasn't interested in a relationship, he continued making moves and flirting, telling me that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me and that we were soulmates.
He told me that he was having a rough home life and that I was the only one in the world who didn't think he was creepy for the way he looked or would give up on him. (Nobody ever said that he was ugly). He would constantly ask if he was handsome or not, and he was not bad looking at all, just lacking in some hygiene skills like wearing deodorant and showering regularly, and dental care. He seemed really insecure about the way he looked to the point that the insecurity became the most noticeable thing about the way he carried himself. No amount of compliments or reassurance would soothe him.
I showed up for his football games and performances to support him, and he never showed up for my plays or finished small tasks that I asked him, as a friend, to complete. Whenever addressed he would break down and say that he was the "worst person in the world" and that he would "die for me." He eventually stopped talking to me and moved on to somebody else.
I honestly think he needed more attention and love from his parents and was using the desire for a girlfriend to fill the emotional gap. I feel bad for him, but I'm glad to have some distance.
He told me that he was having a rough home life and that I was the only one in the world who didn't think he was creepy for the way he looked or would give up on him. (Nobody ever said that he was ugly). He would constantly ask if he was handsome or not, and he was not bad looking at all, just lacking in some hygiene skills like wearing deodorant and showering regularly, and dental care. He seemed really insecure about the way he looked to the point that the insecurity became the most noticeable thing about the way he carried himself. No amount of compliments or reassurance would soothe him.
I showed up for his football games and performances to support him, and he never showed up for my plays or finished small tasks that I asked him, as a friend, to complete. Whenever addressed he would break down and say that he was the "worst person in the world" and that he would "die for me." He eventually stopped talking to me and moved on to somebody else.
I honestly think he needed more attention and love from his parents and was using the desire for a girlfriend to fill the emotional gap. I feel bad for him, but I'm glad to have some distance.
122points
#22
Not me & I'm not a girl lmao but I had a friend who gave a nice guy a chance. They got married & it went downhill in less than a year.
The dude had some major self-esteem issues & sought validation from other women even in marriage. He got caught talking to other women on Facebook, Tinder, etc & claimed it was therapeutic for his self-esteem issues. The kicker was that we all worked at the same place in different departments. It was like being backstage at the Maury show
The dude had some major self-esteem issues & sought validation from other women even in marriage. He got caught talking to other women on Facebook, Tinder, etc & claimed it was therapeutic for his self-esteem issues. The kicker was that we all worked at the same place in different departments. It was like being backstage at the Maury show
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108points
#23
He was criticizing everything I did. Why do I go to university, why do I live where I live, why do I do my makeup, why do I do popular things (he hated everything that ‘popular’ people did, which I wasn’t he just had the idea that there are things that popular people do and like and things that only nice people) - which is crazy considering the fact that we were already in our 20s, he was 28 talking about this pointless unpopular vs popular thing like high schoolers - also every time he thought I was mad at him, he deleted me on every social media. It was frustrating, tiring and hurting. So eventually I stopped talking to him and now I’m labelled as ‘popular basic sl*t just like the rest of the females.
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104points
#24
SO bad. About 3 months in he asked me for advice on some selfies he took (ick but whatever) I chose one. He never posted it to his Instagram but I thought nothing of it. Two weeks later my friend sent me a screenshot of a tinder profile and said “Isn’t this the guy you’ve been dating?” It was him and he’d used the picture I chose as his main picture.
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100points
#25
Met a “nice guy” on Tinder, whom I was really into. I previously had never met someone that I had so much in common with, got along with, and was physically attracted to. We dated for a little before he started ghosting me. Found out his depression hit him really hard so I left him alone like he wanted. He hit me up again a little while later after starting therapy and antidepressants and told me how much he liked me and wanted to see me and we would date until he would ghost me again. Super apologetic and aware of his wrongdoings and would be incredibly understanding of my boundaries every time. This same cycle continued 3 more times over the span of 8 months until I found out (by chance and from someone else) that he was seeing someone else. Turned out just to be a really selfish guy who was stringing me along just because he could. Don’t think he’s a bad person at all but definitely very selfish and dishonest and didn’t know what he wanted which ended up being at my expense.
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100points
#26
It was nice at first but then he started slowly becoming manipulative and distancing himself. After a short while, he stopped talking to me and acted like I didn't exist. I broke up with him, and get this, he told me he forgot we were even dating.
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94points
#27
I almost gave the “nice guy” a chance but after he showed up at my house uninvited and made my dad super angry (had a strict “no boys allowed” rule until I hit 18; I was 15 at the time), I gave up. He begged me to “give him a chance” because we both liked World of Warcraft. That was it. Glad I did give up because of the stalking, inappropriate thigh touches at lunch, creepy talks about “what he wanted to do to me”, trying to convince me to sneak out in the middle of the night to see him, etc absolutely terrified me. I haven’t seen him in quite a while but I’m honestly still scared to be alone in that county. I have a BF now that doesn’t do that but I never go visit my parents without him or stay at their house alone. I’m now 23 and still worry.
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88points
#28
I found him very smart at first, but after dating for a while and sleeping together he proceeded to become the WORST misogynist I've ever known. Tried to control my choices in food, clothing, friend, political stance, EVERYTHING.
And when I ended things, he proceeded to share to his friends (which were also my new friends at that time) all the things I shared to him in confidence while we were dating. And when I finally blocked him from everything, he tried to reveal things in class group chats where our classmates (outside the friend circle) were members of.
It was the worst dating experience I've ever had and he wasn't even good looking. Needless to say, I won't ever indulge in charity cases again.
And when I ended things, he proceeded to share to his friends (which were also my new friends at that time) all the things I shared to him in confidence while we were dating. And when I finally blocked him from everything, he tried to reveal things in class group chats where our classmates (outside the friend circle) were members of.
It was the worst dating experience I've ever had and he wasn't even good looking. Needless to say, I won't ever indulge in charity cases again.
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86points
Exploring relationships and understanding the dynamics of trust can be a complex journey, especially in a world full of varied experiences and individual quirks. The challenge of uncovering true personas amidst the honeymoon phases is not unlike the recent discussions about the nuances of perception in familiar narratives. If you're looking for a fascinating insight into how different viewpoints can shape interpretations and even spark debates, you might find it interesting to see how a beloved character and her iconic attire stirred conversation.
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