Bridget Goes, 25, is not convinced that a friend’s expensive trip to New York City should become her problem.
She pushed back against the idea that steep hotel prices entitled visitors to stay at her home for free, arguing that asking for complimentary accommodation was particularly “rude” when the guest had nothing to offer in return.
Highlights
- Bridget Goes sparked backlash by arguing that friends should not expect free accommodation in NYC.
- Another creator defended her stance, saying social media had blurred the lines between friends and acquaintances.
- An Ally Financial expert explained how social spending can conflict with young adults’ savings goals.
Netizens were quick to weigh in on her stance, and many were far from impressed.
“May this friendship never find me,” one commenter wrote.
Bridget Goes argued that expensive NYC hotels did not entitle friends to free accommodation
Goes made her point not just on her own behalf but also for several people who had shared similar complaints with her.
“Stop asking your friends who live in an apartment in NYC to be your free hotel,” she told her nearly 3 million TikTok viewers.
“It’s rude to ask them, ‘Hey, can I stay at your place?’ if they never offered it.”
The woman highlighted Harry Styles’ 30-night residency at Madison Square Garden, which runs through October 31, as a major reason people were flocking to the Big Apple.
“Get a hotel. There are also lots of hostels in New York,” she ranted, punctuating her point with a sharp jab.
“If you can’t afford to stay in New York, then you either need to travel home that night, or you can’t afford to go to the concert. Period.”
Goes added that even when someone agreed to host a guest, it was “rude” for the visitor to leave without offering a thoughtful “host gift” or treating them to “a nice lunch or dinner the next day or the day of.”
Her seemingly inhospitable take drew immediate criticism.
Several viewers said they would be disappointed if friends visiting their city chose a hotel over staying with them
“I actually get sad when my friends spend money on a hotel and don’t stay with me because it makes me happy to make their life easier and cheaper,” one TikTok user noted.
“What’s the point of friends if you can’t call them [for a favor]?” another commenter asked.
“Everybody wants to be a village but doesn’t want to be a villager,” a third remarked.
Meanwhile, a separate user turned the debate into a broader criticism of Gen Z.
“Is there anything this generation does not complain about?” one person asked.
Despite the backlash, Goes also had supporters.
Another creator argued that viewers were misinterpreting Goes’ stance on hosting friends
Kat Capili, an aspiring singer and actress, weighed in with her own video, arguing that Goes was not necessarily referring to close friends.
“I really don’t think she meant her friends. I think she meant acquaintances. I think she meant people who barely know you who only contact you when they need something,” she said.
Capili explained that she also lives in New York and has had people she had not “spoken to since I was 12 years old” ask to crash on her couch.
Capili argued that such requests from people with little or no ongoing relationship with the host were inappropriate and should not be normalized.
She then attempted to explain why people with long-forgotten connections might feel comfortable making such demands.
“I feel like social media has given people a parasocial relationship, and they think that you’re friends because they’ve been liking your posts for the last 10 years, but we’re not friends,” she said.
Capili added that she receives such requests on a weekly basis.
The debate, unsurprisingly, reflects the high cost of maintaining a social life, which can be particularly challenging for Gen Z.
A recent report from Ally Financial, a digital bank, explored the challenges young adults face when trying to balance their social lives with long-term financial stability.
A behavioral finance expert says prime-age adults are torn between splurging and saving
Jacqueline Howard, a behavioral finance expert at Ally, told the New York Post in an October 25 interview that young people often struggle to reconcile their desire for indulgences such as A-list concert tickets and upscale hotels with their future financial goals.
“Social spending is impacting long-term financial goals for three in five Gen Z and millennials,” Howard said.
“Only 18% of young adults say they have a strict budget for social activities, and 42% admit they overspend several months out of the year.”
The expert advised friends to communicate their personal and financial limitations to one another to avoid awkwardness surrounding requests to stay over.
“Building financial transparency is one of the healthiest things you can bring into a partnership,” Howard said.
“The strongest friendships will honor those boundaries, not pressure you to go beyond your comfort zone when it comes to your finances.”
"Sad for you," a netizen told Goes
