When Confidence Goes Too Far: 35 Times Men Assumed They Knew Better

To gain more insight into this topic, we got in touch with Suzanna de Baca, CEO of Story Board Advisors. She was kind enough to have a chat with Bored Panda and break down what exactly mansplaining is.

"Mansplaining is a made up word that describes the phenomenon of a person, generally a man, providing a condescending explanation of something to someone who already understands it," Suzanna explained. "Mansplaining differs from 'normal everyday explaining,' in that the explanation or comment is generally communicated in a condescending or overconfident tone, is sometimes inaccurate and often oversimplified."

"While women have, for decades, experienced the realities of gender disparities in the workplace, a new vocabulary has emerged to describe those experiences," Suzanna continued. "It is not always gender specific, but research conducted by Michigan State University graduate research fellow Caitlin Briggs published in the Journal of Business and Psychology indicates women tend to react more negatively because we are so often questioned about our competence and qualifications."

"Over time, the term has become commonly used to describe a disrespectful or condescending explanation regardless of whether the commenter was male or female," she added.

So why are men so inclined to "mansplain"? "Research varies, but traditional societal norms or expectations reinforce the idea that men should exude confidence, appear knowledgeable or add value," Suzanna noted.

"Men (or women who mansplain) may do this unintentionally, unaware that they are doing it. The condescending tone or approach may be attributable to numerous factors, ranging from a lack of emotional intelligence to unconscious overcompensation for a lack of confidence," the expert continued. "In personal situations, men may be trying to be protective or assist in solving problems, or lack the ability to connect emotionally so resort to behavior that ends up being patronizing."

But Suzanna says that it's important to know that not all men mansplain. "And not all explanations are wrong, even if they are not communicated in a productive manner," she pointed out. "It is possible the person – conditioned by societal norms – is truly trying to be helpful. It is possible the person is trying to add value, or in a personal situation they want to protect or take care – or perhaps they don’t really know how to connect."

So how should we respond to mansplaining? "Well intended or not, it is important to respond with clear and respectful communication to point out the behavior and to reinforce your own ground rules for communication in the relationship," Suzanna shared.

"It can be helpful to refer to the behavior or inaccuracy, and ask the person to listen to your point of view or perspective. Depending on the situation, you can remind them you are familiar with the topic or situation (perhaps even have specific expertise)," she continued. "You also can politely respond that you’ve 'got this,' redirect the conversation or – if your response is falling on deaf ears – end the interaction or come back to it later."

Finally, Suzanna added that there is often a burden on women to sit politely and smile, use humor to diffuse a situation, or to be accommodating when we are interrupted or on the receiving end of condescending interactions.

"To change societal norms, it is important that we speak up about the type of communication we prefer and deserve to receive," she told Bored Panda. "Providing that feedback in the same respectful way we expect to be treated will help provide opportunities for others to learn, grow and change outdated societal norms."