#3 This Isn't Exactly What We Meant When We Told Him That He Could Look Up Puppy Training Tips On Youtube
Dr. Bonior, the host of the 'Baggage Check' podcast and the author of 'Detox Your Thoughts,' shared some of her thoughts on the extent to which people ought to be honest in communicating with others.
"I think there's a lot of beauty in honesty, especially when compared to the overly edited and curated images that we tend to portray on social media. It's a breath of fresh air to imagine children who have not yet learned to think of themselves as a brand, just speaking their true feelings," she told Bored Panda. However, she noted that, at the same time, parents also want their children to be compassionate and empathetic members of society.
"So there is a balance of taking other people's feelings into account. People who live most authentically and honestly and also are putting good into the world can find this balance—by speaking the truth with kindness, by considering how they would want to hear certain things themselves, and by knowing that not all thoughts are meant to be spoken out loud if they don't help someone gain insight," Dr. Bonior explained where the limits between honesty and kindness lie.
We were also curious about the point at which we start from saying and writing everything we mean to filtering our thoughts. Dr. Bonior said that she believes society tends to "breed honesty out of kids" relatively young.
"We may punish them for saying something inappropriate or embarrassing, even though their intent was never to harm someone. Or we may inadvertently teach them that not getting caught is more important than not doing something, which also teaches them to live in more dishonest ways," she explained to Bored Panda.
"Instead, I think it would be more helpful to have useful conversations about how to speak our truth and ways that are helpful and still considerate, and how to not feel that we have to be perfect—even on social media—all the time."
The r/KidsWhoMeanWell online community was founded all the way back in mid-February of 2018. Though it hasn’t grown much beyond the 1.5k members who follow the subreddit, the photos shared in the group are rip-roaringly hilarious!
It’s a peek back into our own childhoods where many of us were far more direct in how we communicated. We’d say and write exactly what was on our minds, without thinking about the consequences of how it’d affect others. Fun(ny)? Absolutely!
The r/KidsWhoMeanWell really puts into perspective how we communicate with others. Most of you Pandas reading this will probably agree that we used to be far more straightforward and direct in how we spoke and wrote. When we were kids, we didn’t exactly filter our thoughts all that much! If something popped into our minds, we’d express it. For better or for worse.
However, as time went on and we grew and matured, we began to self-censor our thoughts more and more. Instead of saying exactly what it is we’d love to shout and write, we’d run everything through a filter to make it more appealing to whatever audience might be listening to us. We all became a blend of diplomats, corporate climbers, and politicians, whatever our actual studies or professions. Our reputations and survival depend on it.
Look, whether we like it or not, words can hurt. Some of us are resilient to criticism, others crumble at the slightest hint of bluntness. So it’s up to all of us to find a way to express our honest thoughts while also making the person we’re speaking to feel like they don’t have to get offended or defensive.
It’s a fine balance between being completely open and presenting our opinions in a dignified, diplomatic way. Bluntness isn’t always the best way to communicate, even if it’s 100% how we feel. You have to think about the consequences your words will have and have enough empathy to recognize how the people around you will feel when they hear or read them.
#16 My 6 Year Old Drew Her Dad, Me, Herself And Her Little Brother..... We’re Snorkelling
As kids, we’re not responsible for all of our actions (yet), but we develop new skills and learn more about how the world and society function very quickly. As adults, we have to shoulder more and more burdens. We can’t excuse immature behavior because we’re no longer munchkins running around the playground.
It sounds absolutely wonderful to live in a world where everyone’s free to speak their mind. Politeness would quickly go out the window because every single person you meet will tell you what they think upfront, and expect the same from you. However, that’s simply not how the world works (and it won’t be, unless the planet devolves into some weird AI-and-microchip-controlled dystopia).
There’s a massive difference in how others react to the very same ideas we propose, just when you switch around how you express them. Tone, body language, politeness, all of these things matter.
