Guy Finds The Worst Construction Fails And 'Justifies' Them With Hilarious Captions (30 Pics)

"Generally speaking toilets are poorly designed, way too many twists and and turns. I like to elevate the shitter as much as possible so when you’re dropping bombs it’s a straight drop to the city! Feeling like a Gargoyle up on your perch is just a bonus!"

"Customer safety is always a top priority of mine. With no hesitation I always add a couple extra screws to make sure the plates don’t fall off. Electrocution is a very serious issue which I do not take lightly"

"Some tasks are easier than they look! This task is just as easy as it looks. I opted to add the stopper a little lower because I know overtime the door will sag and I ain’t interested in callbacks! I’m always thinking ahead; probably why I am so successful!"

"I love when my clients send me pictures of my work after I have left. Really shows how satisfied they are with the work!"

"Customer refused to pay my hourly rate; instead he opted to pay per fitting. I was a little hesitant at first but I think this might be the better way to charge! I made a fortune off this job"

"I don't know about you but I have spent hours looking at dank memes on the shitter only to have my battery die! That is why I have decided to add outlets on all my toilets for charging purposes so I can keep the party going!"

"I had a customer looking to increase the window size at his store. His sales are down and he thinks it is possibly related to the lack of natural light in the showroom! Frankly I agree! I put in this massive window which has tripled the natural light, inevitably tripling his sales also!"

"I've mastered the 90 degree corner so I was excited about the challenge of trimming this radius. I guess I'm a master of doing the radius also! Special shout out to homedepot for making all these cuts for me!"

"When looking for studs, I generally start as far away from my mounting location as possible, and start sending screws home until I make a secure connection. Now when this satisfied customer is sitting back and watching re-runs of Two and a Half Men, they will remember how difficult the installation was, and will understand why my bill was so high!"

"Luxury at its finest. I added this soap shelf complimentary to the customer because we all know what happens when you drop the soap in the shower! You gotta bend over and pick it up, and nobody is having a good time doing that! I sometimes wonder if all these extra freebies I do are gonna crush my bottom line one day, my rates are so high though so I should be good!"

"Matching these old profiles can be next to impossible, I find if you try your best, and get it as close as possible, nobody is the wiser! I selected this profile which is practically identical, other than a few minor differences. If I didn’t point it out, you would never have noticed!"

"I increased the size of this return air grille because I felt the existing grille was undersized! Sometimes you just need to return a little extra air to the furnace! Only way to keep it working properly!"

"I always leave the barcode facing out. This way it stays clean and easily scannable when you decide to return the tiles"

"Turning a 1.5 bath home into a 2.5 bath is surprising easy. I’m surprised more humans don’t do it! It immediately increases the value of the home.... not to mention the cost savings on water; I can be dropping a bomb simultaneously as my friend yet it’s only gonna take 6L to send them home!"

"One of the shutters fell off my customers house. He asked if I could match existing. After all the excellent work I put out you'd think at this point humans would just know I can do anything. So once again I blew the socks right off the customer with my advanced set of skill"

"You have to be careful when cutting into structure. Always leave an inch at the bottom of the joist, this way it will retain its structure! By running this pipe through it, and spray foaming it altogether the joist is stronger than when I started; stronger than wood itself!"

"I started removing this tub surround so I could prep for tile and my oh my it was my lucky day. There was already tile installed. After a quick tidy up I’ll be submitting my bill and then onto the next one!"

"Have you ever tried taking 2 buckets apart? It’s impossible; that’s why I always look to the bucket for all my HVAC needs! The wedge fit guarantees no heat loss, so it’s a no brainer!"

"When installing vanities, I generally make a few reference holes so I can get my bearings in relation to the pipe. I usually get it in 4-6 holes, it doesn’t really matter if you go over though, as it’s the inside of the cabinet. When I’m done I caulk the holes so the rats can’t get through, and then toss a pack of sponges on top! In the end no one is the wiser! "

"My customer wanted me to replace her deck with 1x1 deck tiles and she was ecstatic when I surprised her with 4x4 deck tiles. The customers reaction is why I constantly strive to outdo myself and exceed the high expectations that I have created for myself! And yes I built this deck a few years ago but she wanted a fresh look!"