30 Times People Encountered Someone So Blatantly Stupid, They Just Had To Share

I've posted this story before but this seems like another appropriate thread for this story.

One night during high school, my friend and I got invited to a party. I didn't drive back then so my friend picked me up. All went well on our way to the party. On the way back however, he got pulled over. As we were pulling to the side of the road, I told him that I was gonna pretend to be sleeping (since I was the passenger). Anyway, I hear the cop get out of his cop car, walk towards our car, stops at the window but doesn't say anything. I can feel the brightness of his flashlight but I don't hear him or my friend say anything. After about what seemed like an eternity, I decide to open my eyes to see what's going on. That's when I see my friend, the guy who is driving, is pretending like he is sleeping too.

Coworker was anti wind mills. When I asked why she said “there are way too many popping up and we’re going to use up all of the wind.”

I was speechless. I’m never speechless.

My brother and i were in the kitchen one day as teenagers. My brother was filling the sink to wash dishes. When the sink was nearly full he went to turn the tap off but it wouldnt budge so the water kept flowing. I tried turning it too but with no success. This is when the panic set in. The level of the water was rising fast and we didn't want to flood the kitchen. He took big saucepans out of the press to fill with water to keep things from over flowing, while i was in a frantic scramble under the sink trying to find the mains to turn it off there. I couldn't find it!! Now really panicking i took over the pot filling duty and my brother went running off to look for dad as quick as he could. Dad came running in with my brother while we were shoutng at him about looking for the mains. Dad just came over to the sink and pulled the plug out of the hole letting all the water down the drain. Ha ha

I had manager named Roxanne (Rocky). She was a bleach blonde (literally bleached her hair once a month and then wondered why it broke/fell out) bubble head who only had the job because daddy owned the restaurant.

Rocky was really obsessed with her looks and not much else. One day she told me, and a co-worker, that she had her nose job done so that her eventual children wouldn't grow up with the same nose as her. She wasn't kidding. The co-worker and I just looked at each other and walked away. We knew it wasn't worth the effort.

I’ve told this story before, but I like telling it because f**k Tammy. I had a boss named Tammy. One night, we were all working late doing stocktake, and we were discussing the impending lunar eclipse. Someone asked what happens during an eclipse. Tammy grandly explained that the eclipse would occur when America went in front of the moon, blocking our (Australia’s) view of it. Like she literally thought the earth stretched itself into like a U bend or neck pillow shape, and half of it stayed in our normal orbit, and the other half stretched itself over and around to casually block the moon for the rest of the earth.

my friends sister was 20 and pregnant, she said something about how upset she was her vagina would be ruined, i jokingly said “maybe he’ll come out of your butt instead” she said “what do you mean? can they come out of there too?”, i thought she was joking so i just said “duh, it’s a 50/50 shot” she thought i was serious and asked her doctor if he could tell if the baby was gonna come out of her vagina or ass.

I can sum it up very easily: We were at the shooting range, his gun jammed, he looked down the barrel to see what was wrong.

Back in my younger and crankier days I worked with as young woman who was hands down the dumbest person I've ever met.

Her highlights include

Winning a basket auction that included a copy of The Beach Boy's album Pet Sounds and complaing because she "didn't want to hear a lot of mooing"

On a day she was driving me up a wall I convinced her to wait to open her bottle of Coke because the bottle said there was a winner every five minutes. She was disappointed she didn't win after waiting exactly five minutes. I however enjoyed her sulky silence for the rest of the day.

The best/worst one involved her chatting with a manager who was African American (she's white). They were discussing their shared slightly uncommon name and then realized their families both came from South Carolina. She thought for a few minuted and then excitedly exclaimed "I bet my family owned yours!". She was so proud of herself for figuring out that historic connection. The manager didn't say a word and just walked away.

“Why do the crossings beep.” “For blind people.” “But blind people can’t drive?” “...”

When I was in the Navy, there was a cook on my ship. He once served "rare" chicken. I genuinely couldn't tell whether he was trying to cover up his limitless incompetence or if he genuinely believed that rare poultry is a real thing. He was dumb enough to believe it. Another time, he just filled a pan with ground beef and called it meat loaf. Another time he was supposed to make sugar cookies, you know, several hundred of them for the whole crew. He didn't bother to read the label on the container he opened, and apparently he didn't taste the batter at any point, and he actually made salt cookies. He used up all the remaining salt in the pantry and we had unseasoned food for the remaining several weeks of the mission, during which time the captain assigned someone to be the cook's bodyguard.

We shall call him Chad. Chad was a guy I worked with years ago and he was terrible with directions. He had no idea where he was, or where he was going, and was terrible at identifying landmarks. So we are working less than 5 minutes from our store on this particular day in a small residential area about a mile and a half down the road. Including the turn out of the driveway you have to make 3 turns, all right hand turns, and cross one intersection and you'll be at our store. A short time into what is an all day job we realize we have some equipment at the store that would help us out tremendously. I ask Chad to go get it. He doesn't know the way. I explain it to him. He stares at me. It's 3 right hand turns, Chad, I think you can do it. Chad wants a map. Fine. I draw a map. Chad leaves. 25 minutes go by. Chad should have been back by now. I call the store and I'm told that Chad left 10 minutes ago. As I am on the phone I hear the truck coming and he drives right by the house. Well, [crap]. Poor Chad forgot what house we were at. No big deal, the road is a giant circle and he will come around again in a moment. So I walk up the driveway, and sure enough here he comes again. I wave, and he pulls in the driveway. As he gets out I laugh and say, "Haha, aww man, you forgot what house we were at?" Chad deadpans, "Naw man, ya moved the truck." ... Chad was looking for the company truck in the driveway. The very same truck he was driving.

My room mate for the last 3 years once said that if solar technology keeps advancing at the rate it is, we will absorb all the energy made by the sun and fix global warming. Not 5 minutes later after attempting to inform this poor fellow about how the suns energy output is not determined by what the energy eventualy interacts with, he states that wind farms are worse because they cause tropical storms. I hope he is just an epic troll. I just... I don't know...

This French - Italian guy I used to work with. I could seriously write a book about how ignorant, idiotic and illogical this man was, but this story sums it up pretty well:

He's against vaxinations, because he thinks everything in the world is a government conspiracy and he's also a nature freak who believes in homeopathy. He believes clay has a lot of almost supernatural healing qualities. When he lived in Denmark he and his wife couldn't enroll their son in kindergarten unless he had some basic vaccinations because that's the law.

So they went to get the boy vaccinated, but as soon as he's gotten the shot and they've walked out of the doctors office he took the bandage off and slapped a lump of clay on the boys arm right where he got the shot. This, he believed, would suck the liquid that was in the syringe out of the boys vains and get absorbed into the clay to be disposed of safely. So in his mind he had basically "un-vaccinated" the boy and the silly reptilian surgeon general had no idea! Haha in your face NWO!

It's kind of a happy ending though, stupidity saved the day and the boy now has the vaccinations he should despite his insane father.

I once had a property manager (person in charge of the rental I lived in since homeowners who lived out of state) who did a bunch of obnoxious things. My husband and I thought she was greedy and maybe getting money for herself and hiding it from the homeowners for repairs or something like that because of shady seeming things she would do when we had repairs.

Then we mentioned something about gardening.

She said "You know, I've always wanted to try growing tomatoes and just watering them with salt water. That way, the tomatoes would already be salted when you ate them!"

Huge reminder to never attribute to malice what is just pure old fashioned being dumb as a rock.

Work with a guy who honestly believes he will not die. Also believes that doctor's are"part of the system" and that they lie to you for profit and personal gain. He does believe in Eastern traditional medicine however. And if you're interested to know his secret to eternal life, it's 6 raw eggs a day and a keto diet.

My mom's coworker claims she doesn't care about the price of gas. She says "it doesn't matter how much it costs because no matter what I only put in 20 bucks."

I am half-korean going to high school in the Midwest during the 1992 LA riots. My typing teacher pulled me into the hallway and asked if I had an uncle or something I can call in LA to make the riots stop. She said she knew that we are all close and we all have stores and what not, therefore I must have a connection there. I was like, "lady, even if I did have an uncle I could call do you think he is Batman?"

One of my roommates. I live in a house where we give interviews to prospective new roommates to make sure they're cool. We were interviewing a deaf guy, and he was looking like a good fit. We also have a list of rules and guidelines for living in the house, and one of the current roommates asks "oh man, are we gonna have to get the rules printed in braille?" For. A. Deaf. Guy.

Far from an isolated incident.

There was a,,, troubled kid I went to high-school with. He struggled with school but had friends but was starting to do drugs and go down a bad way. He decided to photo copy the front and back side of a 20 dollar bill, cut it out of normal paper, and glue the two half’s with Elmer’s glue. Whats even more sad is that to test his new money he went to the gas station and bought some gum and it ACTUALLY WORKED?!? So in his mind it must have meant that it was fool proof. So he then tried to go and deposit the glued up money at an actual bank. He was obviously found out and arrested. I don’t know where he is now but I’m assuming he is making similar life choices.

When I was a teenager my friends older brother was one of the dumbest I'd ever encountered. We once witnessed him trying to see inside a motorcycle gas tank using a bic lighter. He assured us a lighter flame isn't hot enough to ignite gasoline.

On another occasion, we got into a debate concerning the power of an atomic bomb. He was dead set that it could only take out " like two houses max!" O___0

This man went on to have multiple arrests before I moved away, also fathered 3 children by 2 women. We all lived in a trailer court as well...not saying it's a prerequisite for idiocy, but some of us get out and some do not.