Building a formidable, long-lasting friendship can take years. However, it only takes one incident to cause significant damage and ruin everything for good.
The following responses are from a question someone posed on Reddit: “What was the incident in your friend group?” People shared stories about infidelity, hypocrisy, jealousy, and deceit. Some were because of childish reasons. Ultimately, they all led to messy friend breakups, which are always awful when they happen.
Scroll down the list to read through the answers. You may feel for a few people because of what happened to them, but some may make you shake your head in disappointment.
#1
One of the vocally “anti-children during hangouts” women got pregnant, then brought her infant to every hangout and shushed anyone who spoke above a decibel. We reminded her that she was the one who gave other people s**t if they even hinted at bringing one of their kids.l and hangout time was adult time. She started sabotaging the group hangouts so we ousted her.
99points
#2
A friend of ours was talking to a girl on the internet. He went to meet her and got arrested. Turns out ... there was no girl; it was one of those undercover stings where officers act like underage kids to catch men speaking to children. ... He traveled almost 200 miles to meet this underage girl. It broke our friend group apart. Some tried to defend him, saying that it was entrapment; others, like me, cut all ties with him.
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91points
#3
We broke up an engaged couple as a group. Basically staged an intervention with the groom. There was 12 of us at this meeting. She was a terrible, hateful person that was only marrying our friend for his earning potential. She was working to seperate him from his friends and family.
Folks, if literally your entire friend groups HATES your partner, you should listen to them.
He was pissed, but thankfully did some soul searching and talked with his parents and broke it off. He later married a fantastic woman that we all adore. They're probably the happiest couple in our friend group.
Folks, if literally your entire friend groups HATES your partner, you should listen to them.
He was pissed, but thankfully did some soul searching and talked with his parents and broke it off. He later married a fantastic woman that we all adore. They're probably the happiest couple in our friend group.
89points
#4
Accidental discharge of a firearm at a Christmas party after alcohol. I was the intended 'target'. The shooter got himself instead. For my health, I decided upon a change of cities and friend groups.
87points
#5
Had a group of friends in high school, and I got married and had a child shortly after. My wife and I struggled a bit financially, and I was starting to become stressed out and depressed about it. Us guys got together, and I talked a bit about it to get it off my chest. The entire group came to the conclusion that the best way to fix the financial issues was to abandon my wife and daughter. And it wasn't joking sorta stuff either. They really meant it.
Needless to say, I dint associate with them anymore.
Needless to say, I dint associate with them anymore.
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86points
#6
Weirdly enough, a car accident. Four friends were in the car when it got T-Boned. Totally the other driver's fault, she was going too fast into a blind hill. Our friend in the seat that was closest to the accident died from internal injuries. The last time we were all together was his funeral. We see each other around town now and again, still have mutual friends, we're all in a "Remembering (friend)" facebook group with his family. But for some reason we all just. Never got together again. No one talks about it. .
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83points
#7
Friend asks all of us to be bridesmaids in her wedding, lets us buy dresses and get them altered, then gets married in her backyard alone without telling any of us. We found out when the wedding pictures were posted on Facebook.
71points
#8
I was the youngest in my friend group at the time and looked up to my friends a lot, and I valued their opinion on me. They knew that, and all but two of them apparently thought it’d be funny to get together and make a long list of everything they found annoying/weird about me, then sent it to me assuming the other two would be on their side. They weren’t.
An entire relationship was broken apart, I started going to therapy for a while, and what remained of that group argued with each other until they all split. It’s been three years and that still stays on my mind.
An entire relationship was broken apart, I started going to therapy for a while, and what remained of that group argued with each other until they all split. It’s been three years and that still stays on my mind.
68points
#9
The girlfriend of my friend Bob announced to our group of friends that one of our friends (lets call him John) tried to kiss her in a party where Bob was not presented.
John denied that he did such thing and he said that it was actually her that tried to kiss him in the party, but when he refused she became mad at him and said that she would "destroy his life".
We didn't have any proof that either story was true, so half of our friend group decided to side with Bob and his girlfriend, while the rest of us sided with John. This created a divide in our group and things were weird for a while.
But around 2 months after this incident Bob found out that his girlfriend was f*****g a co-worker and broke up with her. Now, this still doesn't prove who was telling the truth regarding the attempt kiss in that party between her and John, but now everybody believed in John's version.
Unfortunately this caused big crack in our group that never fully healed. Despite his ex cheating on him with a co-worker, for some reason Bob still believed in her version of the story and never tried to make amends with John.
Also, the part of our group that initially believed in Bob's girlfriend story tried to apologize to John, but John never accepted their apologies. He was angry because some of our friends decided to believe in a unknown girl (she was Bob's girlfriend, but she was never part of our group; we knew very little about her) instead of believing him. Some of our friends that sided with her knew John for more than 10 years, yet they didn't believe in him.
So, in the end, she didn't destroy John's life like she promised, but she destroyed our group of friends. F**k that b***h.
John denied that he did such thing and he said that it was actually her that tried to kiss him in the party, but when he refused she became mad at him and said that she would "destroy his life".
We didn't have any proof that either story was true, so half of our friend group decided to side with Bob and his girlfriend, while the rest of us sided with John. This created a divide in our group and things were weird for a while.
But around 2 months after this incident Bob found out that his girlfriend was f*****g a co-worker and broke up with her. Now, this still doesn't prove who was telling the truth regarding the attempt kiss in that party between her and John, but now everybody believed in John's version.
Unfortunately this caused big crack in our group that never fully healed. Despite his ex cheating on him with a co-worker, for some reason Bob still believed in her version of the story and never tried to make amends with John.
Also, the part of our group that initially believed in Bob's girlfriend story tried to apologize to John, but John never accepted their apologies. He was angry because some of our friends decided to believe in a unknown girl (she was Bob's girlfriend, but she was never part of our group; we knew very little about her) instead of believing him. Some of our friends that sided with her knew John for more than 10 years, yet they didn't believe in him.
So, in the end, she didn't destroy John's life like she promised, but she destroyed our group of friends. F**k that b***h.
61points
#10
One of the former members of my friend group started selling d***s to children and bringing them to his place to get high together.
We knew he was a dealer but selling to kids crossed a red line. One of us admitted to anonymously tipping off the cops about it. There's 2 circumstances among us where snitching is 100% acceptable. If one of us beat our gf, or anything involving children.
We knew he was a dealer but selling to kids crossed a red line. One of us admitted to anonymously tipping off the cops about it. There's 2 circumstances among us where snitching is 100% acceptable. If one of us beat our gf, or anything involving children.
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58points
#11
Our friend, the perfect husband with a perfect wife and a perfect child and a perfect harmonic relationship showing love to each other all the time had encounters with HUNDREDS of [escorts] all around country. He was travelling a lot with his car and had a second secret mobile phone. His wife found it and there were literally hundreds of phone numbers to [escorts]. He left, no contact for almost 2 years, and then he came back and they are back together like nothing happened. WTF? :D.
46points
#12
My friend [slept with] my girlfriend inside my house, on my bed... This was the incident that separated us all, we were a group of friends of 7 people, including my old girlfriend.
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42points
#13
We found out that a former friend in our circle had gone full QAnon and was in the January 6th riots. So that's *fun*.
42points
#14
A former friend of the group had a mental breakdown, assaulted his sister, and declared himself the second coming of Jesus.
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41points
#15
Found out that a friend had faked his death and assumed a new identity. This was because he used to be a d**g dealer and needed to disappear to avoid arrest.
This all came up because his girlfriend at the time hit him and then called the cops. Once he was fingerprinted it all came up.
This all came up because his girlfriend at the time hit him and then called the cops. Once he was fingerprinted it all came up.
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41points
#16
Guy A (32) was in a long term relationship with Girl A (26).
Girl B (22) was friends with me (25). Girl B started sleeping with Guy A. Girl B had a drinking problem. Guy A would get Girl B drunk and sleep with her. I found out, lost my s**t. Guy A started a smear campaign against me and caused me to lose 90% of my friends.
Girl A came to me 2 years later and asked if Guy A had slept with Girl B. I said yes. Guy A, convinced Girl B to lie about the situation. Girl A cut contact with me. Eventually Girl A found out the truth several years later and dumped him. I never got an apology or closure.
Girl B (22) was friends with me (25). Girl B started sleeping with Guy A. Girl B had a drinking problem. Guy A would get Girl B drunk and sleep with her. I found out, lost my s**t. Guy A started a smear campaign against me and caused me to lose 90% of my friends.
Girl A came to me 2 years later and asked if Guy A had slept with Girl B. I said yes. Guy A, convinced Girl B to lie about the situation. Girl A cut contact with me. Eventually Girl A found out the truth several years later and dumped him. I never got an apology or closure.
39points
#17
A friend's dog [ended] and ate another friend's smaller dog.
38points
#18
Our friend just vanished. Straight up disappeared and nobody knew where he went.
I was on a two week school trip back then myself, so I was more disconnected of the whole thing, but apparently his parents had divorced (only one person got the info very late) and he wanted a short break to gather his thoughts. He even had made plans with our other friends to meet after said time. Only to just… not to do so.
He stopped answering to everyone, abandoned every account he had and… just stopped being.
The friend, who got the memo, and I had suspected for a while that he might be depressed, due to his slowly growing drinking habit in the evening and subtle change in personality. We even voiced our concerns back then, which he, according to his own words, appreciated.
Those of us who could would try to visit him often and look for him at home, only for his new roommate to just turn them away with “he isn’t home at the moment.” Don’t know if he delivered the memos or gifts we left either.
I understand if he didn’t want to be friends with us anymore. Anyone has the right to that and doesn’t have to justify it, but since the change came so sudden and concerned everyone, especially since he wasn’t doing well, everyone was really worried.
A few months later one of our other friends met him surprisingly at a work event, where he tried to talk with him. He was miserable and not looking good, but alive, which to some extent calmed some of us a bit. According to our friend he was indeed depressed and was trapped in the non stop downwards spiral, where he couldn’t answer his friends but wanted to, feeling more and more ashamed of himself and so withdrawing even more. My friend tried to calm him and had apparently a good talk. They even made plans to meet again, only for my friend to cancel them due to an own private emergency. After that our missing friend didn’t respond again.
Shortly after that there was a huge fight with some
other friends of the group (unrelated, but the stress from said incident didn’t help), which split it definitely. It was pure chaos and a stressful time. I mean we still talk separately together, do stuff now and then, even got new friends into the group, but it’s not the same anymore…
Also it might seem rather silly, but I still write to my missing friend from time to time – don’t know if he gets them though. As long as he doesn’t tell me to quit it, I will continue to do so. I miss him dearly.
Sorry for the long rant. It has been two years, but I just realised how much this has affected me.
I just hope he’s doing better, everything else is not important.
I was on a two week school trip back then myself, so I was more disconnected of the whole thing, but apparently his parents had divorced (only one person got the info very late) and he wanted a short break to gather his thoughts. He even had made plans with our other friends to meet after said time. Only to just… not to do so.
He stopped answering to everyone, abandoned every account he had and… just stopped being.
The friend, who got the memo, and I had suspected for a while that he might be depressed, due to his slowly growing drinking habit in the evening and subtle change in personality. We even voiced our concerns back then, which he, according to his own words, appreciated.
Those of us who could would try to visit him often and look for him at home, only for his new roommate to just turn them away with “he isn’t home at the moment.” Don’t know if he delivered the memos or gifts we left either.
I understand if he didn’t want to be friends with us anymore. Anyone has the right to that and doesn’t have to justify it, but since the change came so sudden and concerned everyone, especially since he wasn’t doing well, everyone was really worried.
A few months later one of our other friends met him surprisingly at a work event, where he tried to talk with him. He was miserable and not looking good, but alive, which to some extent calmed some of us a bit. According to our friend he was indeed depressed and was trapped in the non stop downwards spiral, where he couldn’t answer his friends but wanted to, feeling more and more ashamed of himself and so withdrawing even more. My friend tried to calm him and had apparently a good talk. They even made plans to meet again, only for my friend to cancel them due to an own private emergency. After that our missing friend didn’t respond again.
Shortly after that there was a huge fight with some
other friends of the group (unrelated, but the stress from said incident didn’t help), which split it definitely. It was pure chaos and a stressful time. I mean we still talk separately together, do stuff now and then, even got new friends into the group, but it’s not the same anymore…
Also it might seem rather silly, but I still write to my missing friend from time to time – don’t know if he gets them though. As long as he doesn’t tell me to quit it, I will continue to do so. I miss him dearly.
Sorry for the long rant. It has been two years, but I just realised how much this has affected me.
I just hope he’s doing better, everything else is not important.
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37points
#19
One of my best friends was getting married. In the months leading up to it, his mother had a falling out with his fiancee about throwing her a second shower while the fiancee was working in another part of the country. They eventually all seemingly make up but his mom never got over it. There was a big misunderstanding at the rehearsal dinner (truly too long for this) and my buddy's family made an absolute a*s of themselves. He disowned his parents that night and his brother told him to find a new best man.
They shared a family plan and shut off my buddy's phone the morning of his wedding. While we're all having a good time, he's panicing and setting up a new phone number and transfering all his work stuff over to his new number. His parents told everyone on their side that the wedding was off. The wedding wasn't off. His side of the church was near empty, I had to write a best man's speech the night before and help the wedding planner rearrange the dining hall so it didn't look like his whole family flaked on him. It's been five years of his parents writing letters, chasing them in stores (small town), and showing up to their house unannounced. They've not acknowledged his wife once in any communication. His mom told all her customers the wedding was off, but everyone in town can clearly see my friends are very much married. She stopped working all together not long after.
My brother could commit capital murder and I'd still be on his side of the courtroom. F**k you, I hope you see this.
They shared a family plan and shut off my buddy's phone the morning of his wedding. While we're all having a good time, he's panicing and setting up a new phone number and transfering all his work stuff over to his new number. His parents told everyone on their side that the wedding was off. The wedding wasn't off. His side of the church was near empty, I had to write a best man's speech the night before and help the wedding planner rearrange the dining hall so it didn't look like his whole family flaked on him. It's been five years of his parents writing letters, chasing them in stores (small town), and showing up to their house unannounced. They've not acknowledged his wife once in any communication. His mom told all her customers the wedding was off, but everyone in town can clearly see my friends are very much married. She stopped working all together not long after.
My brother could commit capital murder and I'd still be on his side of the courtroom. F**k you, I hope you see this.
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34points
#20
I've had a group of buddies, 4 of us total, since high school. We all ended up in college together.
I brought a girl into the friend group. We went on a few informal dates, and would make out a little bit, but when summer came our freshman year of college, we cooled off. I got a girlfriend, she ended up fooling around with a guy back home. It was really no big deal. We still remained friends with no hard feelings.
One of my friends ended up hooking up with this girl regularly. Total FWB situation. I was glad. Now there was really no hard feelings or jealousy because I was with my girlfriend and she had my buddy to have her fun with.
We noticed our third friend ended up getting really distant and resentful. THREE YEARS LATER on a road trip, he gets drunk and confronts my buddy: He was madly in love with my friend, my buddy's FWB, and felt betrayed to find out my buddy was sleeping with her.
We basically brought this incident to "Friend Court". All four of us had a trial and really gave our friend a piece of our mind. He was way out of line to be so upset about a secret crush he told nobody about, and a crush on a girl he had no exclusive "dibs" on.
I brought a girl into the friend group. We went on a few informal dates, and would make out a little bit, but when summer came our freshman year of college, we cooled off. I got a girlfriend, she ended up fooling around with a guy back home. It was really no big deal. We still remained friends with no hard feelings.
One of my friends ended up hooking up with this girl regularly. Total FWB situation. I was glad. Now there was really no hard feelings or jealousy because I was with my girlfriend and she had my buddy to have her fun with.
We noticed our third friend ended up getting really distant and resentful. THREE YEARS LATER on a road trip, he gets drunk and confronts my buddy: He was madly in love with my friend, my buddy's FWB, and felt betrayed to find out my buddy was sleeping with her.
We basically brought this incident to "Friend Court". All four of us had a trial and really gave our friend a piece of our mind. He was way out of line to be so upset about a secret crush he told nobody about, and a crush on a girl he had no exclusive "dibs" on.
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33points