People Who Forgave Their Significant Other's Affair Share What Happened After That (25 Stories)

It’s scary to think of someone you love having an affair, but unfortunately, infidelity is more common than you’d imagine. The problem is also that the cheating partner does their best to cover up their tracks, which makes it harder to find out what they’ve done. When their mistakes are found out, it’s up to the victim to decide whether they can give the relationship another go.

To understand forgiveness after infidelity, Bored Panda reached out to Stacey and Paul Martino. They are the authors of ‘The Missing Piece,’ a book that can help transform people’s relationships. They also invented the Relationship Development Methodology and, for over 14 years, have helped thousands of people transform their marriages, parenting, and families!

The Martinos told us that “the biggest obstacle in reaching genuine forgiveness is largely caused by our false beliefs that [it] means that you are saying that what they did is ‘okay.’ In reality, forgiveness happens within you and for you, so that you can be free of the burden of carrying unforgiveness.”

Some of the folks on this list were able to forgive and forget their partner’s misdeeds very quickly. It shows a lot of strength of character and courage, but that kind of action may not be possible for everyone. That’s why we asked Luke Shillings what it takes to really pardon someone’s infidelity. 

Luke is a relationship coach and podcast host of ‘After the Affair,’ helping individuals and couples rebuild their lives after infidelity. Drawing from personal experience and professional training, he offers compassionate guidance to those navigating betrayal, healing, and growth.

He told us that “forgiveness is absolutely possible, but it’s not something that happens overnight or because someone says, ‘I’m sorry.’ For couples, forgiveness requires both partners to show up in ways they never have before.” 

“The person who cheated has to take full accountability, not just for the affair but for rebuilding trust through consistent actions over time. Meanwhile, the betrayed partner needs space to process their emotions without being rushed. There’s no shortcut. Honesty, vulnerability, and professional support often play a big role in helping couples navigate this journey,” Luke added.

It’s very common to hear the phrase ‘once a cheater, always a cheater,’ which is why most people believe that no relationship can survive infidelity. Stacey and Paul Martino told us that they “worked with many people who had been through infidelity and were told by couple's counselors and therapists that divorce was their only option. That is not the case!”

“With the right tools and process, it's absolutely possible to save and even create a new rock-solid, passionate relationship, stronger than ever,” the Martinos added.

Life coach Luke also told us that “surviving infidelity is possible (I'm living proof!), but ‘smoothly’ isn’t the word I’d use to describe the process. Rebuilding a relationship after an affair is messy, emotional, and filled with setbacks. There is also no 'perfect path'. But with the right mindset and effort from both people, it can absolutely be done.”

“I’ve seen couples use the pain of infidelity as a wake-up call, not just to fix the cracks in their relationship but to grow individually, too. They learn to communicate better, set boundaries, and really hear each other. That said, not every relationship will survive, and that’s okay, too. Sometimes, infidelity shines a light on deeper issues that can’t or shouldn’t be ignored,” he added.

It’s truly difficult to move on from a partner’s affair, but nearly 60% of couples do recover from infidelity. It requires a lot of trust, hard work, and honest communication from both people in order to make the relationship work properly again.

Stacey and Paul told us that “when trust is lost in a relationship, it's terrible for both people. Often, people will tell their partner to ‘apologize and promise me that it will never happen again.’ But even when they do, it doesn't fix the feelings of mistrust that the betrayed spouse genuinely suffers from.”

“Please don't feel bad. There's nothing wrong with you, and it's not hopeless. It's just that trust doesn't work that way. Like forgiveness, trust or mistrust is a result, not a cause. When you get the steps to rebuild the rapport and alignment, trust begins to blossom,” the Martinos explained.

Even though it’s easy to say that the cheating partner needs to win back their loved one’s trust, it’s hard to know exactly how to do that. Since the topic is such a taboo, hardly anyone wants to discuss the exact steps required to heal the relationship after an affair.

Coach Luke told us that “the person who cheated needs to be completely transparent. This means no secrets, no lies, and a genuine willingness to answer hard questions. Just as important, they need to show empathy, real empathy, for the hurt they’ve caused.”

“A simple apology isn’t enough. They need to be patient as their partner works through the waves of emotions that follow. One thing I always remind people is that trust isn’t a destination; it’s a practice. Every day, both partners have to show up, communicate honestly, and make choices that reflect their commitment to moving forward. It’s tough, but it’s absolutely worth it.”

Nobody wants to get cheated on or be a cheater, but sometimes life deals us unexpected cards. What’s good to know is that there is hope even after infidelity, but it all hinges on how hard both parties work to repair their bond. Not everyone can make it happen, but as the list shows, some couples definitely do!

Do you think people can work through an affair or not? Do share your honest thoughts in the comments. We’d love to hear from you.