Women can experience misogyny from the moment they are born, and sometimes even before that. Men do not always see or experience these inequalities firsthand, but becoming a father to a girl can make some of them much more aware of how society treats women as they grow up.
One Redditor asked men to share how their view of women changed after having a daughter, and they came through with plenty of answers. We’ve rounded up some of their responses below. Scroll down to read them and share your thoughts in the comments.
#1

Honestly? No. My view of women hasn't changed.
I sometimes hear men say things like, "I support the #MeToo movement because I have two daughters." Or, "Of course I want more increased opportunities for girls. I have a daughter."
For me, that's a stupid reason to support something. I support equal opportunity for everyone because I believe in equality for all human beings. I didn't need to have my daughter to suddenly care about women.
I sometimes hear men say things like, "I support the #MeToo movement because I have two daughters." Or, "Of course I want more increased opportunities for girls. I have a daughter."
For me, that's a stupid reason to support something. I support equal opportunity for everyone because I believe in equality for all human beings. I didn't need to have my daughter to suddenly care about women.
40points
#2

All the macho talk about not letting your daughter date and talking to the bf while cleaning your gun is stupid once I had a daughter. She’s not my property, she’s my daughter. She’s a smart, caring, thoughtful, amazing person. My job is to raise her the right way so she respects others and, most importantly, herself. If she makes wrong decisions, me and her mom will always be there to pick her up and help her through it. I hate that macho stuff, it’s selling your daughter short.
31points
#3

I have 2 girls (3 and 5) and they are both about the same size. Very healthy and active but the little one is just growing faster.
This is a problem to my MIL who likes to say one is built like a princess and one is built like a linebacker. She always comments on it to them and even withholds food from the little one when I'm not around.
What kind of monster starts bullying and body shaming a little girl at age 3?
Ive talked to my wife extensively about this and apparently my MIL did the same to my wife as well growing up about body image and weight. I never understood how destructive women can be to each other about appearance.
She's a little girl. A 3 year old little girl and if you ever make her cry or feel ashamed about her body I'm going to knock grandma's teeth out and take my little girls to Disneyland.
This is a problem to my MIL who likes to say one is built like a princess and one is built like a linebacker. She always comments on it to them and even withholds food from the little one when I'm not around.
What kind of monster starts bullying and body shaming a little girl at age 3?
Ive talked to my wife extensively about this and apparently my MIL did the same to my wife as well growing up about body image and weight. I never understood how destructive women can be to each other about appearance.
She's a little girl. A 3 year old little girl and if you ever make her cry or feel ashamed about her body I'm going to knock grandma's teeth out and take my little girls to Disneyland.
25points
#4

Was really surprised to see how important female characters in media and video games were to my daughter. Opened my eyes to the value of seeing people that look like yourself doing things.
20points
#5

I guess the biggest thing I noticed was how early the creepyness towards girls starts. My daughter was like 2 months old and people were already saying cthings like "oh, blue eyes! you better lock her up when shes a teen!" or "oh wow! shes gonna be a leggy blond!" "you're going to have to keep a CLOSE eye on her around the boys!"
"THOUGH SHE IS BUT AN INFANT, SOME DAY INDIVIDUALS WILL WISH TO HAVE HER! IT WILL BE YOUR DUTY AS THE DOMINANT MALE OF YOUR FAMILIAL UNIT TO ENSURE THAT TOO MANY UNDESIREABLE MATES DO NOT COPULATE WITH HER. YOU ARE WELCOME FOR THE COMPLIMENT! GOOD DAY SIR!"
Nobody does that with boys. Boys people just speculate about if theyll be good at football, or smart, or strong.
"THOUGH SHE IS BUT AN INFANT, SOME DAY INDIVIDUALS WILL WISH TO HAVE HER! IT WILL BE YOUR DUTY AS THE DOMINANT MALE OF YOUR FAMILIAL UNIT TO ENSURE THAT TOO MANY UNDESIREABLE MATES DO NOT COPULATE WITH HER. YOU ARE WELCOME FOR THE COMPLIMENT! GOOD DAY SIR!"
Nobody does that with boys. Boys people just speculate about if theyll be good at football, or smart, or strong.
16points
#6

I don’t think I’d say different, but I’m much more likely to call out misbehavior when I see it. Every guy has has those friends that throw a little bit of casual s*xism into their humor on occasion, and while it’s never really been my style of humor I never really said anything about it to stop it either; it’s hard to fit in sometimes and you don’t want to be the party pooper if you’ve found yourself a group. Now though, guys that participate in that are generally no longer people I associate with. I’m seeing the world partially through my daughters eyes now, and even as early as kindergarten she’s having to deal with bullies at school trying to put girls down simply because they hold the belief that boys are better. The work I’ve had to do with her to educate her, help her believe in herself and build up her own self-confidence has actually been a really difficult thing for me. So I know a lot of dudes aren’t actually s*xist and wouldn’t say s*xist stuff in front of women, but maybe they casually say that in front of their son and their son not knowing better just believes that boys are better than girls.
Not speaking up is condoning the behavior, normalizing it, and that’s not a world I want my daughter growing up in. Women have it hard enough without having to deal with implicit or casual s*xism too.
Not speaking up is condoning the behavior, normalizing it, and that’s not a world I want my daughter growing up in. Women have it hard enough without having to deal with implicit or casual s*xism too.
16points
#7

I realize how difficult it is being a woman . They always have to deal with the objectification issue no matter what they do. leering looks, odd come ons, all the time. It must be incredibly frustrating after awhile and you must just want to tell a creeper "look,, I am just here trying to buy groceries, work out or get the oil changed on my car. I am not looking to start dating a complete stranger."
So having daughters has made me a bit more conscious about my own behavior around women.
So having daughters has made me a bit more conscious about my own behavior around women.
16points
#8

Funny, i thought mine was pretty open before my daughter. thought women were equal and all that. but it has changed i guess in that i think i'm more vocal or pro-active with it. she is only 2 but they were playing some game and they wanted her to be the "princess". i explained to her, you certainly can be the "fighter" too, no need to just assume a role. Got her trucks and stuff too because that is what she likes, letting her know the world is open
it certainly is tough to put in to practice as she gets older, but i think i have my heels dug in to have her back no matter where this goes.
it certainly is tough to put in to practice as she gets older, but i think i have my heels dug in to have her back no matter where this goes.
15points
#9

I understand more some people point of view regarding women in movies and media. I mean I was a bit "yeah, that's right", but I did not know to what extent there are very few positive models for young girls. It's not non existent though, but you have to almost limit you to things made the last 15 years.
Before that, women are dumb, or succeed through marrying rich men, or are just a prize for the hero. And even after that, a lot of "positive" roles are kung fu expert jerks... Successful business women are for most of them negative, corrupted characters (that is the case in the 3 last series I've seen, "the boys", "Jessica Jones", and "the bodyguard").
Before that, women are dumb, or succeed through marrying rich men, or are just a prize for the hero. And even after that, a lot of "positive" roles are kung fu expert jerks... Successful business women are for most of them negative, corrupted characters (that is the case in the 3 last series I've seen, "the boys", "Jessica Jones", and "the bodyguard").
15points
#10

I now cringe when listening to how women are spoken about in rap songs.
14points
#11

I noticed that a lot of women around us have been the ones trying to enforce traditional feminine norms, as opposed a patriarchal thing. My daughter will happily play with dolls, but she also loves cars, building things, and Spider-Man. Two of those are definitely not from mom and dad, as I don’t build much beyond LEGO, and I am super bored with cars. Grandma, aunts, and female cousins are constantly trying to make her wear nothing but pink, frilly things, and only play with dolls and kitchen toys. She would rather wear black and red, or anything with monsters or Halloween themes. I let her enjoy whatever she likes, but the women in the family get upset when she pretends to be Simba or Spider-Man.
14points
#12

I have two teenage step daughters, no kids of my own. I met my current fiancé when they were 7 and 9 years old and they’re now 14 and 16.
I would say that since I met them and having been around more woman in general since I met my fiancé has really opened up my views on how woman are treated in general. From guiding them through teen drama and dealing with boys it’s really just different methods, I don’t know how else to describe it. In most cases we usually reach the same conclusions but have vastly different methods on how to get there.
I think that worldwide we really need to treat each other better in general but the double standards applied to women compared to men blows my mind.
I would say that since I met them and having been around more woman in general since I met my fiancé has really opened up my views on how woman are treated in general. From guiding them through teen drama and dealing with boys it’s really just different methods, I don’t know how else to describe it. In most cases we usually reach the same conclusions but have vastly different methods on how to get there.
I think that worldwide we really need to treat each other better in general but the double standards applied to women compared to men blows my mind.
13points
#13

No, it's made me double down on my position that women are not damsels and shouldn't be treated like they are. They need to be resilient, capable, tough, and ready to take on the world.
13points
#14

That I’m a bull in a china shop when it comes to their feelings( I have two daughters) . I’ve learned that if I think that something is slightly insensitive then it is most definitely will cut them deep. If I think that something is even slightly uplifting it will make their day.
I’ve also learned that my daughters want me to be genuinely interested in them.
I’ve learned that they see me as one who can protect them and one who can exasperate them.
But what I’ve really learned is how much softer and kinder my daughters mere presence bring out in me. They truly taught me how to love and be loved. Truly the most valuable gifts I’ve ever received.
I’ve also learned that my daughters want me to be genuinely interested in them.
I’ve learned that they see me as one who can protect them and one who can exasperate them.
But what I’ve really learned is how much softer and kinder my daughters mere presence bring out in me. They truly taught me how to love and be loved. Truly the most valuable gifts I’ve ever received.
12points
#15

Broadly, I've always been on the "women are people train" even before my little miss.
After her I'm pretty sure her existence is what gave me the chutzpah to actually being lodging complaints about my one gross coworker and how he pestered the new girl 30 years younger than himself.
So, she gave me more active strength to do what is right.
Edit: one of the few times I'm genuinely confused about the down votes.
After her I'm pretty sure her existence is what gave me the chutzpah to actually being lodging complaints about my one gross coworker and how he pestered the new girl 30 years younger than himself.
So, she gave me more active strength to do what is right.
Edit: one of the few times I'm genuinely confused about the down votes.
11points
#16

I'm now supremely aggressive whenever I catch misogynistic behavior. In the past, I ranged between doing those kind of things myself (especially the dumb "jokes") to just shrugging and going "meh, don't be a snowflake". Nowadays... yeah, just don't do that in my general vicinity or at least be prepared to get yelled at.
10points
#17

For me, having daughters made me reflect a whole lot more on how I treat others.
I’m not a true jerk or anything but I can be selfish at times and treat others poorly from time to time. Especially in high school I was a real jerk and who cheated on most of the girlfriends I had.
So now that I have two daughters (4 and 9), I constantly think about how I am shaping their expectations of how men should act, through my actions. Hypocritical as it may be, nowadays I get real pissed at cheaters, for example.
I try to use how I treat my wife and daughters as an example of what they should look for in a guy later on. Not full-on “princess” status though. You still have chores. You still have responsibilities. But you are ALWAYS treated with honor and respect.
I’m not a true jerk or anything but I can be selfish at times and treat others poorly from time to time. Especially in high school I was a real jerk and who cheated on most of the girlfriends I had.
So now that I have two daughters (4 and 9), I constantly think about how I am shaping their expectations of how men should act, through my actions. Hypocritical as it may be, nowadays I get real pissed at cheaters, for example.
I try to use how I treat my wife and daughters as an example of what they should look for in a guy later on. Not full-on “princess” status though. You still have chores. You still have responsibilities. But you are ALWAYS treated with honor and respect.
9points
#18

My dayghter is almost 4, so its hard to say exactly how my views have changed but I know I have a more sympathetic outlook for sure. But, if I may take this a slightly different route I would say my overall outlook on the world we live in has changed. I realize how little most people seem to care unless the woman is either hilarious or gorgeous. It made me see just how bad I had been and others around my friend group were as teens/early adults. Its bonkers raising a daughter. But she is for sure the reason I have been becoming a better man.
7points
#19

Yes, 100%. These little sweethearts want the simplest things. All I have to do is be here and they're happy.
7points
#20

Absolutely! I used to think women and men were equal in emotional content but boy was I wrong. I have seen my mom and sister struggle with emotions but when I saw my own daughter struggle I realised that being a girl and going through puberty is an emotional roller coaster that I could not handle personally. Great respect for all the women in my life, including the transgenders. I love you all!
6points


