“They Are Death Machines”: 50 Things Doctors Wish That More People Knew

Not a doctor but I managed a private practice for a couple of years in California: The reason we ask for your **biological s*x** and not what ''gender'' you identify as in your form is not because the doctor is a bigot whateverphobic, but because men and women require different dosages for several d***s and there are d***s that women can take that would k**l a man and viceversa. Also, because we have to know what tests and check ups you will need. For example: If you changed s*x from a man to a woman you still need a prostate exam because the inside of your body will always be that of a male human, cancer doesn't give a d**n.

I'm not an MD, I'm an RN. Here's some real advice: do not let yourself grow old and obese. I will forgo any talk of high blood pressure, heart disease, stroke, diabetes; that's inside stuff and while I'm well educated on it, I want to talk of the outside stuff that will make your life miserable. I'm talking arthritis, skin breakdown, lack of hygiene and the depression that goes along with it.

The arthritis starts because your bone structure is in no way designed to carry 3 to 4 times the normal body weight. The joints wear down, the bone spurs develop, the spinal stenosis kicks in, and you find that every movement is an orchestra of multiple different minor but irritating pains all shooting off at once. You can't get out of bed or up from a chair without several body parts giving out little screams of pain. You will get used to it, but you will not like it. And you will start moving less and less; you'll start weighing the decision to get up and go do some social activity versus the pain it will cause you and at some point, the pain wins out and you start going out less and less. In the most extreme cases you will start to alter how to go the bathroom or clean yourself because a trip to the toilet and all the maneuvering it takes will just be too much.

As you start to move less and less, you start to clean yourself less and less, and the skin excoriation and fungal infections start to form in your various folds and crevices. You also have trouble fully wiping after a bowel movement, or you spill a little on yourself as you've adapted to using urinals instead of the toilet. Eventually your lack of movement and inability to clean yourself and exposure to bodily fluids leads to various ulcers that are painful and take a long time to heal. In the worst cases you can get a pressure ulcer that doesn't go away, is constantly exposed to fecal material, an infection starts and you eventually go septic and end up in the ICU.

So with this lack of movement and ability to fully clean self comes the obvious result of just smelling bad. I'm not trying to be an a*****e here, but the lack of hygiene will cause friends and family to avoid coming over, or going places with you, or just having any social contact beyond a phone call. The isolation will escalate, the depression will increase, your world becomes smaller and smaller and you just hate yourself for the trap you're in. It sucks but other people can only take so much.

And on top of it all, even at rest, you won't be comfortable. You can't breath properly when sleeping so you get a cpap at home, and while that takes care of properly oxygenating yourself while at rest, the aching joints and muscle spasms will prevent you from ever having a satisfying sleep again. You will always be tired, this just exacerbates all the problems I just mentioned.

And in the end, severe depression. Severe self hate. Feeling trapped in a body that's become a prison and at your age there's no way out. You're isolated, you're alone, and the friends and family you do have avoid visiting. When they do come around, you have to either ask them for help with all the things you've neglected to do because you physically can't (which they start to see coming, so they up and leave or just don't come by at all), or you just sit their and have a sad conversation that dances around the elephant in the room that is what's become of your life. It's sad, just all around sad.

So I didn't write this to be an a*****e, I wrote it because I see these types of people in the hospital and in home care regularly. In America the obesity epidemic is so prevalent, and it affects every aspect of a persons life. Obesity is a prison cell in and of itself. Now as an RN and as a human being, I'm not trying to judge you for why it happened, it is what it is, but please if you are seriously overweight or obese, now is the day to start doing something about it. Do not wait any longer. Do not hope for a magic cure. Do not deny what is happening. Make the changes, you are worth it.

Actually a doctor.

I wish people would know that when I say, "I don't think CPR is in your/your relatives' best interests", I am not saying I am going to withdraw all treatment immediately. CPR is BRUTAL, and it has a much lower success rate (even if done promptly in hospital) than the movies make out. If you are old, or have a lot of medical problems, then the success rate goes down even more.

If I don't want to do CPR on you it's not because I want you to die, it's because I don't want to fracture your ribs, expose your body to a huge group of people you don't know (everyone loves attending a crash call), and repeatedly a*****t your dead body for nothing. I want you to die with dignity and care if there is no chance of bringing you back.

In summary, CPR is great and everyone should learn how to do it, it does save lives. But, if a doctor suggests it should not be performed, please give serious thought to that. We don't suggest a DNACPR for no reason.

Tell us what d***s and alcohol you’re on.

We aren’t gonna tell the cops. We aren’t gonna lecture you.

But it might change the anesthesia I give you. Some stuff I give you might k**l you. If you drink a 30 pack a day, tell me.

If your baby is crying and crying and won’t stop, check their toes and if it’s a boy, check his p***s. Sometimes a strand of hair can get caught around a toe or a p***s or a testicle and slowly strangle it, called a hair tourniquet. I saw one little baby who lost a testicle like this so now I warn every parent to double check.

Not a Dr. But l do have some advice.

If you're ever short of breath and it's unexplained ( not running while being a fat smoker like me)
GO SEE A DR. NOW.

For about 4 days prior to this past Christmas (2018) my wife (f29) was short of breath and felt generally crummy.

We didn't think it was anything but a cold/allergies etc.
Christmas day she felt worse, didn't move much. So I told her that if she doesn't show improvement by the next morning (12/26/18, yes the dates are important, you'll see why)
That I would be forcing her to go to the ER and get checked out.

She didn't have any improvement. Only worse.

I took her to the ER around 4pm that day. When they took her back and got her hooked up she was at 40-45% O2 saturation. Which is bad. She was then sent by ambulance to the nearest hospital with an ICU.

For any Dr's in the house, there was about a golf ball size part of her lungs that showed black on the x-ray, the rest was white........


By 10pm that day she had dropped to 10-15% o2 saturation and was immediately put on a ventilator and was kept asleep for 2 weeks. She was, at most, a few hours from dying.

She had pneumonia and sepsis in both lungs.

Due to the amount of meds they gave her, and being dehydrated already her kidneys took a hard hit. She had dialysis 6 times in the hospital.

After 37 days in the hospital, 14 of which she was in and out of consciousness, she remembers not being able to talk and trying to write some stuff on a paper, she was released.

Last week (July 1st ish) we got blood work back that her kidneys were finally back to 99.6% function.

I'm a nurse not a doctor but... All these fad diets that claim to "detoxify" you are nonsense. Your liver and kidneys are the only way you're getting detoxified, not some MLM magic vitamin pill that your co-worker sells.

Quit asking for antibiotics when you have a virus. It's literally doing nothing for you, except killing the good bacteria in your body, and it's creating super bacteria. Doctors, quit prescribing antibiotics when you know it's a virus because you just don't feel like arguing with Karen. I've seen this way too many times. "Karen" brings her kid with the sniffles to the ER and demands antibiotics. Doc prescribes them to shut Karen up and get her brat out of the ER. Stop it.

Vaccines aren't some big pharma conspiracy. They work. Big pharma is gonna f**k you by price gouging you, not in some crazy conspiracy to poison you. The amount of aluminium in a typical vaccine is a smaller amount than you consume in your everyday diet. There is no Mercury in children's vaccines. The mercury that's in multi-dose adult vaccines is not the same as the mercury that was in old thermometers. Many facilities ,such as mine, don't even use multi dose vials. Just because a chemical compound sounds scary doesn't mean it is scary. The vaccine schedule for children is fine. Not getting your kid the chicken pox vaccine is setting your kid up for shingles when they get older and that s**t is not fun. I get it, you had chicken pox when you were younger and you are ok. I hope you don't get shingles cause you are gonna regret having chicken pox. The pain from shingles is no joke.

I'm an ENT. Please bring ear plugs to loud concerts and shows. Please don't listen to music on your earbuds/headphones too loud. Your hearing doesn't regenerate and you put yourself at a higher risk of developing tinnitus (ringing in your ears) and hyperacusis (sensitivity to sound).

You need some kind of exercise. Doesn't matter how you feel right now, sitting for 12-16 hours a day will have negative consequences.

There is no "cure for cancer" as it is traditionally thought about.

Cancer is a class of MANY MANY very different diseases, each with very specific causes (ie some molecule that went wrong allowing a cell to multiply out of control). Even within the same type of cancer (ie lung cancer) there are many types of lung cancer, such as small cell, large cell, squamous cell etc. Even within the same subtype of cancer, there can be different molecular mechanisms that caused it, requiring different approaches to treatment.

Looking for the "cure for cancer" is like looking for the "cure for disease.".

Please do not confuse your google search with my medical degree!!!

Such a cliche but seriously please don’t !!!!

Some things just don't belong in your r****m.

BloodsNCrits:

I mean..nothing wrong with gettin a little freaky folks, just keep it within reason. Mason jars? Traffic cones?A vacuum cleaner hose attachment? All things that do NOT belong in your r****m.

Not a doctor but am a trauma nurse.

Motorcycles are f*****g awesome but they are also death machines. Don't ever get on a f*****g motorcycle, but if you do anyway, WEAR A F*****G HELMET.

Injuries accumulate. I cannot stress this enough. Little kids have no business lifting heavy weights or getting pushed so hard in sports by some of these 'coaches' who seem to have little knowledge of physiology or don't care about the long term impact of the regiments. Stuff like this really changes people's lives.

Women, please do not use soap or douching products inside your v****a. It has a delicate pH balance and this is how you get yeast infections. Wash your labia, but do not clean internally. The v****a is self-cleaning just like your eyeballs. Do you wash your eyeballs? No. Do you wash your face? Yes.

This is going to sound really basic, but I wish my patients would know what meds they are on when they come to the hospital. At least once a day comes somebody in who goes "Yeah i take 8 pills in the morning, 3 in the evening, and 4 at lunch but don't ask me which, You're a doctor, you should know".

I beg of you, before going to a doctor that has never seen you before, write your meds, dosage and all on a piece of paper.

I work in Germany on the internal medicine ward. I can only see patients record if they were in my hospital or in the neighbouring hospital otherwise i have to call their family doc, who may or may not be at all times available. I mostly just send a family member home to bring the goodies bag so that we can go over them but as you can imagine, that takes a lot of time.

You often will feel normal even with high blood pressure. It's often found incidentally. So don't wait until it gives you symptoms you don't want to go through.

To all those wondering how to figure out if it's asymptomatic. Get checked at least once a year if you're over 35y. There's no other way.

As someone that works with those who may be in a psychotic break. GET SLEEP! Most psychosis happens because someone haven’t had slept or haven’t had good sleep for extended periods of time. Some people just need 20 straight hours of sleep and then they never end up in a psychiatric hospital ever again.


AND DON’T JUST RANDOMLY STOP YOUR MEDICATION BECAUSE YOU FEEL BETTER. You feel better because you have consistent amount of whatever is leveled in your body now. And now that your body is hitting equilibrium everything is going great, so KEEP DOING WHAT YOU’RE DOING. I’ve seen people go on and off their medications for years and it really starts to mess up your body if you do that for too long.

Neonatal provider checking in here! Feed your d**n baby!!! The badge of honor you get for exclusively breastfeeding isn’t real. Dehydration, severe hyperbilirubinemia, hypoglycemia, these are all real and happen all the time. Feed your baby!! Lots of hospitals will even let you use donor breast milk initially if you’re strongly opposed to formula. Just feed your baby. And don’t use a cup or a spoon. The lactation consultants will tell you that babies know how to lap it up. Well, you didn’t give birth to a kitten. If your baby has an intact suck reflex you should use it. It allows the gag reflex to work better. If you feel strongly about the concept of n****e confusion (it’s not a thing) then ask for a SNS System. Tape that tiny tube to a b**b and let your kid eat that way. Just feed your baby. Also, this nonsense about how a baby only needs a few drops of milk in the beginning because their stomach is only the size of a walnut. True, their stomach is small. But much like most other stomachs it stretches and empties pretty readily into the small intestine. Plenty of babies eat a full ounce right out the gate. Errrr, vag.

Lastly, if you have a home birth and your kid ends up coming to the hospital by EMS please let us do our job. If you don’t want any of the care we offer then please refuse EMS. Or don’t even call them to begin with.

Edited: but wait there’s more. I don’t give a s**t if you don’t want hepatitis B vaccine at delivery, you can take that up with your pediatrician. I don’t really care about erythromycin either, unless you’re unclean. But vitamin K. Don’t skip that. It prevents bleeding. It’s a big deal. Babies don’t make their own vitamin K until their gut has sufficient substrate and time to. It’s a key part of the clotting cascade. If it were well absorbed orally we would give it that way, we’re not sadistic pricks that like to give shots to newborn babies for grins. We give it that way because it actually works that way.

How to eat healthy. Just because you're skinny doesn't mean you're healthy. Especially the teenagers who I take care of. Sometimes I will ask them what's a healthy food your doctor wants you to eat? Rarely do I get a right answer. I feel like the internet has so many fad diets, and family members rarely cook, so families don't know basic nutrition facts.