There’s nothing like engineers. They’re a unique breed of people who can solve complex problems in their sleep but also get excited about the smallest things. They see the world through an analytical lens that most people don’t have, which makes them great problem solvers. I mean, that’s the whole point of being an engineer!
Engineers have been humanity’s backbone since the dawn of time. They created bridges, roads, buildings, dams, rockets, and basically anything we see around us that is not a gift from Mother Nature. They see solving problems as a necessity and use creativity to project a solution from scratch. And don’t let me get started about what happens when you combine a bunch of engineers! I have tons of friends who all graduated from the same engineering university. Their conversations are one of a kind, even if they admit that sometimes they also don’t know what they’re supposed to do either.
Engineering is, no doubt, one of the most critical jobs in the world, but it can be pretty dull or indecipherable for the rest of us! How about we spice it up a little bit with some humor and puns? We selected the best engineering jokes for your fun and pleasure!
#21
You might be an engineer if... If you've used coat hangers and duct tape for something other than hanging coats and taping ducts.
unknown
Report102points
#22
Proof: Postulate 1: Knowledge is Power. Postulate 2: Time is Money.
As every engineer knows: Power = Work / Time. And since Knowledge = Power and Time = Money, it is therefore true that Knowledge = Work / Money. Solving for Money, we get: Money = Work / Knowledge. Thus, as Knowledge approaches zero, Money approaches infinity, regardless of the amount of work done.
unknown
Report101points
#23
What’s the difference between an introverted and an extroverted engineer? An introverted engineer looks at his shoes when he’s talking to you. An extroverted engineer looks at your shoes when he’s talking to you.
unknown
Report94points
#24
Me: “You’re an engineer, why are you so dumb about technology?” Spouse: “I just design it, I don’t use it.”
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90points
#25
An engineer is a person who measures with a micrometer, marks it with a crayon, and cuts it with an ax.
unknown
Report87points
#26
You might be an engineer if… You destroy things just to see how they work.
unknown
Report85points
#27
An engineer walks into a pub and demands, “Give me a beer before the problems start!”
The bartender hands out another beer but is visibly concerned as the engineer seems in some sort of pain.
As the engineer finished his 6th beer the bartender asks, “When are you going to start paying for these beers?”
The engineer exclaims, “Now the problems start!”
unknown
Report83points
#28
Wind turbine 1: "What kind of music do you like?" Wind turbine 2: "I'm a big metal fan"
unknown
Report78points
#29
A graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?"
A graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?"
A graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?"
A graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Would you like fries with that?"
A graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?"
A graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?"
A graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Would you like fries with that?"
unknown
Report78points
#30
The programmer got stuck in the shower because the instructions on the shampoo bottle said: Lather, rinse, repeat.
unknown
Report74points
#31
Two antennas got married – the wedding was lousy, but the reception was outstanding.
unknown
Report73points
#32
I can’t believe they gave that engineer who wrecked the train in New York the electric chair. And he survived it! I guess he just wasn’t a very good conductor.
unknown
Report72points
#33
So an electrical engineer built a house entirely out of resistors. The welcome mat said Ohm Sweet Ohm.
unknown
Report72points
#34
Two engineering students bumped into each other at school and one noticed the other’s new bike. He asked, “Where did you get such a wonderful bike?” The other student replied that a blonde rode up to him, threw her bike on the ground, took off all her clothes, threw them on the ground and said, “Take whatever you’d like to have.” The first student says, “Good call, I’ll bet her clothes wouldn’t have fit either of us.”
unknown
Report71points
#35
Overheard in a bar: “I wonder if the person who invented the drawing board got it right first time.”
unknown
Report67points
#36
How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb? Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
unknown
Report66points
#37
What did the electrical engineer say when he got shocked? "That hertz."
unknown
Report64points
#38
My calculator stopped working mid-way through my engineering exam. I can’t count on it anymore.
unknown
Report64points
#39
You might be an engineer if... You think that when people around you yawn, it's because they didn't get enough sleep.
unknown
Report62points
#40
Professor: "What's a hydraulic ram used for?" "It's where you get steel wool!"
unknown
Report59points




