“There Was A Legal Age For Caffeine”: 50 Hilariously Silly Things People Believed To Be True

I believed that when a woman was pregnant with anything more than twins, the babies weren't all in her stomach area because there was no way they would fit. At the time there was a news story about someone who had sextuplets and I thought the setup was two in the stomach, one in each calf, and one in the underside of each arm.

I asked my library teacher if I could go to the bathroom, she asked “Is it an emergency?”

I thought that meant she was going to call an ambulance. I got scared and said no. Almost pissed my pants that day lmfao

I understood decades, but not centuries.

This means I thought the Civil War and hippies protesting for peace were right after one another, followed by the American Revolutionary War and discos.

My dad is missing one of his fingers, when I asked him what happened to it he said it was because he picked his nose with that finger. That was the day I stopped picking my nose.

My dad used to tell us this very elaborate story of how we were born. He told us he had to cut off a piece of his flesh to implant into our mom’s stomach, and how excruciatingly painful it was for him, and why we should therefore be grateful for his sacrifice. He did this in front of our mother, a woman who natural-birthed four children without epidurals. I’m still amazed that she stood by and let him take the credit without saying a thing

My mom told me that every time I told a lie I would get a black mark in my heart and when my heart turned completely black I would go to hell when I died. This was in the early 2000’s

My aunt said that she put a camera in my dog so I would walk him correctly

I grew up near the mountains. On major mountain roads there are pullouts with "no parking" signs that also say "30 min chain up." Sometime in middle school I learned that those signs meant you could stop for 30 min to put snow chains on your car, not that you would be chained up for 30 min as punishment for parking there.

That whenever I saw a store with a “help wanted” sign in the window I thought they were asking for help because of an emergency going on inside the store.

I used to think NHL training camps were held in the woods and the players practiced on frozen ponds.