“You’re Not Really Disabled Tho”: 50 Of The Dumbest Things People Have Said In All Seriousness

When my oldest step daughter was 15, I picked her up after her sport practice. I asked if she felt good after such good exercise. She said yes but then complained that she should've got a shower before I picked her up. I didn't understand. She said "well now that my sweat dried on me, my workout won't make a difference."

I drove in confused silence for a minute and then started giggling.

"Wait, do you think that your body reabsorbs fat through your sweat if you don't shower quickly enough?" I finally managed to ask.

She also started to laugh and admitted that's what she thought and that now that she heard it out loud, it made no sense.

We talked about biology the whole trip home. She's in her 2nd year of nursing school now and acing her classes. 🥰.

My gf once asked me why I believed in reindeers. She thought they were magical creatures like dragons or unicorns.

A coworker (a morbidly obese fellow) said that he didn't need to do cardio because he drank coffee and energy drinks. Because those things made his heart beat faster, and that's all that cardio is, he doesn't need to exercise.

Completely and totally serious to the point that he absolutely could not understand why people waste their time running, bc energy drinks exist.

My cousin once asked “where do astronauts land when it’s only half a moon?”.

Atheists worship the devil.

My great uncle continually says "Gay people will raise gay children."

Last time he said it, I said "Oh absolutely! Because straight people ONLY raise straight children right?"

He stopped talking about it now.

The best part?

He has no idea my Mum is gay, and she raised myself and my brothers alone. My father is a POS. 🤷‍♀️.

“how was i supposed to know the strawberry açaí had strawberries in it” after giving it to somebody allergic to strawberries.

Working in the meat department of a large grocery chain:

"What's the difference between a fresh and a frozen turkey?"

"Is......is this a trick question?".

That he didn't believe Africa was real.

Mom once told teenage me that getting an internal ultrasound meant that a robot took my virginity. I think she cried over this, IIRC.

Someone told me that drones were an extreme security threat, which is a fine argument to make (as long as you have the evidence to back it up), but then he instantly followed up with the comment: "But how do the spies *fit* inside the drones? These drones have to be pretty big to fit the people inside." This had me dumbfounded.

Pointing at a photo of a cave in the distance I took in Israel. "In that cave they found the 2000 year old Dead Sea Scrolls."

My friend "Were they still alive?"

Me befuddled, "Were who still alive?"

"The squirrels. The Dead Sea Squirrels. ".

You should give every guy that approaches you a chance even if you aren't attracted to them because you might learn to love them. As a woman that is the right thing for you to do.

This was said to me on Reddit when I stated that I won't date Conservative/Republican men. I was accused of bullying and hate speech and a bunch of butthurt men reported me. I almost lost my account. 😡🤬😤.

I had a female co-worker who got really upset when Prince Harry got engaged to Meghan Markle. When I asked why, she said it was because she wanted to be a princess. I laughed, because that's a very silly thing for an adult to say and I genuinely thought she was joking. She just looked at me dead in the eyes, super serious, and said again "I wanted... to be... a princess!"

We all lived in a country very far away from the UK, and she had almost a 0% chance of ever meeting Prince Harry.

"No need to worry about lead contamination in our drinking water - we boil it before we drink it." - my boss at an office based in an old Victorian school building in the UK

😬🫤.

"People are not mammals. Dogs are mammals and I am not a dog. I don't walk on four legs or have a tail. Therefore I cannot be a mammal."
She was serious. I couldn't convince her otherwise.

"Oh, it's like winning the lottery"


After she find out i got a widow's pension after my husband died.

I had a tooth crack in Afghanistan. Dentist f****d up the patchwork, 2 months later my root abcessed into my sinus. Incredible, unique pain. Emergency flight to a base with a dentist. They pull the tooth, which caused a hole from my mouth directly into my sinus. Took 3 weeks to heal. Dentist didnt give me a single post op painkiller. I spent all night sobbing in pain bleeding all over my shirt. Before going in the next day, the dentist stopped at my billet, sees me in a blood soaked shirt, eyes sunken and red from crying and pain and asks in complete seriousness "howre you feeling."

Bad, captain. I feel bad.

Mom heard on the news that Mars was going to be close enough to Earth to see with the naked eye.

A couple of evenings later she pointed up at the sky and said, 'Is that Mars?'

'That's the moon, Mom.'

'Are you sure?'

'Very much so.'

She's not suffering from dementia. She's just oblivious.

"Alcohol is so toxic to teenagers that, even a sip, gives them Toxic Shock Syndrome" - driving instructor.

That's the mildest dumb thing that was said.