Even the brightest of us are not immune to doing dumb things. Call it a brain fart, a fog in the decision-making department, a moment of irrational impulse, or a ‘whatever happens, happens’-type of mindset where for a fraction of second, everything kinda makes sense, even the things that normally don’t.
So when someone asked “What is the dumbest thing you’ve ever done for absolutely no reason?” unbeknownst to them, Pandora's box of some entertaining stories was opened. Think of putting gum in your eye just because your dad told not to do that at whatever cost, or opening the door of a moving car just because you wondered what it’d feel like.
Basically, below is one hell of a ride, both hilarious and very relatable. Psst! After you’re done, be sure to check out our previous post on the dumbest things that pretty smart people have done.
#1
Someone asked me what time it was and I lifted and rotated my wrist so I could look at my watch. I was holding an iced tea and just poured the whole thing into my lap.
I wasn’t wearing a watch.
I didn’t even own a watch. Never have.
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495points
#2
I jumped up and (successfully) bit the string that is used to pull the attic door down. It had a metal bead on it... Immediately after I remember thinking “holy s**t I actually got it in my mouth and broke the string”. Then I realized the string was still there, but half my front tooth wasn’t.
As the best man at my wedding said “the attic string went fishing for idiots and caught one”
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417points
#3
I chopped an aerosol paint can in half with an axe. I was far old enough to know better but my cousin and I thought we had it worked out. My mom always said, “One kid, one brain; two kids, no brains.” Boy was she right. I was yellow for a week.
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383points
#4
Maybe not the dumbest but a recent one on my mind. I was in my office with the door closed. Got up from my desk to walk out and knocked on the door before opening it and walking into the hallway.
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316points
#5
Went to a coffee shop and ordered a large cup of coffee. Barista hands it to me and I put it into my purse with no lid.
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295points
#6
We were driving to a restaurant and wanted to see how long the wait was. My dad handed me the phone book and asked me to look up the number. I, for whatever reason, thought he said “get rid of this”. So I opened the window and chucked the phone book while we were going 70 MPH down the highway.
That was over ten years ago, I still get s**t for it.
270points
#7
You know those old cigarette lighters in cars? Nobody in my immediate family smokes, and when I was younger, I pressed it in and it popped out.
I pulled it out to inspect - it was just grey coils - it didn't look red hot or anything. So I tested that sucker the best way I knew how. I stuck it to my tongue.
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241points
#8
During a traffic stop, while trying to act casual, I handed a police officer $50 instead of the licence he asked for.
235points
#9
When I was a kid I went into my parents bathroom. I found my dad’s razor and I decided to scrape it against my tongue, my whole tongue. I started screaming in pain immediately after.
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226points
#10
I once told my roommate I was going out of town, but really hid under his bed for 5 hours so I could freak him out that night.
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222points
#11
Yesterday I was using a nail gun on the trim around the windows of my house. Being the idiot that I am I decided to see what would happen if I shot a penny. The nail ricocheted off the penny, shot past my head, and ended up in the fridge behind me. Close call.
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212points
#12
Microwaved a pen for two minutes in the workplace microwave. To this day I do not know why I did that. Update: I'm still at the same job. The pen was a Frixion Pilot. When the ink smoke cleared and my senses came back to me, I quickly ran across the street to Lowe's and bought the same exact microwave to replace it with. I was never caught.
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209points
#13
When I was a wee boy I woke up early before everyone, went down to the kitchen, grabbed a chair, brought it to the fridge and took the small metal pencil sharpener from the top. I decided to sharpen my pinky first thing in the morning so I can have a sharp finger?? Ended up waking the parents up and bleeding profusely.
203points
#14
I put my finger into a handheld blender and turned it on to see if I could stop the blades from spinning.
I couldn't, and it chewed up my finger. I was 21
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200points
#15
I stuck my head in the opening of the back of our dining room chairs. My head was stuck for almost an hour as my grandad tried to butter me up to get my head out.
I also did the same thing with our stairs banister. Needless to say, I was a stupid child.
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198points
#16
When i was about 8, i was walking out of school, i picked up some pink fairy floss (cotton candy) off the ground and put it in my mouth. It was insulation.
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197points
#17
Sometimes I blow on my ice cream before I take a bite. Have no idea why.
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192points
#18
Boiled a pot of pasta. Then poured the water and noodles down the drain.
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185points
