44 Real And Sobering Confessions From People Who Destroyed Someone Else’s Life

He claimed during the trial I had ruined his life. That I caused relationship problems with him and his girlfriend. That this was all so stressful, his grades were falling. He said he wished he'd never met me. Because I ruined his life. Because somehow that was my fault. It was my fault he forced himself upon me and cheated on his girlfriend, with a girl who wasn't consenting to any of it. I ruined his life. He won't be able to work in certain places anymore. Because I pressed charges. I ruined his life.

Never once did he stop to think that maybe, just maybe, he ruined mine.


Edit- thanks for the gold, stranger.

Edit 2- out of sheer coincidence I found out the verdict of the trial today. They concluded that there was not enough evidence to convict him, although they wish they could.

Edit 3- again, thanks to the people gilding this. I am sad that so many people can identify with my post and the experience I went through. Even though I can't reply to them all, I'm reading everyone's responses. You are such lovely people.

I explained to a militant vegan of 5 years that Laksa Thai soup has milk-product in it. She'd eaten it for breakfast every morning for all of those 5 years. She wouldn't stop crying after I told her.

Edit: It was Laksa Cup of Soups that did indeed have milk-products in them. Calm your teats.

Also I posted in this thread very early on, expecting my comment to get buried. I didn't realize the tone of other people's confessions would be so dark. Please stop commenting "Well this is hardly life ruining hurr durr".

When I was in 5th grade I didn't really know where I fit in so I became a follower. In sunday school a boy started attending who was slightly mentally slow. Still very functional, but something was obviously wrong. Some boys made fun of him and I helped. I remember one sunday, his grandmother got in front of the congregation and told everyone how her grandson vowed to never go back to Church because of how mean we were. That's the last I ever saw of Jeremy. This haunted me for years. Last year, I decided I needed to apologize to clear my conscience. It took me awhile to find him and talk to him. He is now married with a child and seems to be doing really well at life.

Met a girl in university and we started messing around. Just a casual situation once or twice a week if one of us needed some relief kind of thing. Maybe two months in or so and I got a call from the girl's SO. Apparently she was engaged. He was not a happy man. I guess it was really her fault, but I was part of the mess. Turned out her SO and I had some friends in common and I heard his life fell apart for a few years. He's married and has a family now. Still not a fan of mine though.

When I was a young teenager I completely rebelled against my mother. Racked up my phone bill to $500+ nearly every month and she had to pay it, drank drove and she had to pay my lawyer fees ($2000). I moved out of home at 15 and lost my job a month later, I couldn't move out of my new house for reasons so mum was transferring me $200 weekly to pay for my rent and living expenses. Many more things and the debt my mother was in just kept piling up until it was thousands and thousands of dollars, she became depressed over it. Because of me. It [pained] me so I pulled my head right. Everything worked out in the end, her and my father ended up putting all their debts into one loan and bought an investment property which my husband, my daughter and I are renting off them to pay back their loan. They're in a great place financially now but I will never stop feeling terrible about what I put them through. I guess I was just a little immature brat, I hate who I was as a teenager, but I'm glad I grew up and realised what I was doing to them. So much remorse :(.

I was at a 17th birthday party, it was late and we were all pretty drunk, myself and a mate headed across the road to get some food at a chipper. We were attempting to chat up the girl behind the counter and offering her a swig from our bottle of vodka. This older man comes in and is in general good spirits so we offer him a drink, he declines, we offer him again, once again declines but we are drunk and persistent and dont let up. Eventually after a good 2 or 3 mins of us badgering him he gives in, swamps the rest of the bottle and leaves without ordering anything. The girl behind the counter tells us that he is a recovering alcoholic. We feel [awful] but were drunk so it dosent last to long, we go on with our night and think nothing more of it. Fast forward a week and the man we met in the chipper is passed out at 9 in the morning covered in vomit outside a shop by our school. Then it dawns on us that we are the cause of this, we gave him the vodka and knocked him off the wagon. 5 years on and I still feel [awful] over this. I like to believe that he did get his act together in the end but I dont think thats the case. That's my story.

In college, I had a roomie with a full ride plus about 4k a semester extra in scholarships. He had a 4.0. Then I introduced him to EverQuest. Every semester after that moment, he had a 0 GPA. Full Fs in every class. Lost everything. Went home to bag groceries. I still think about him. He was a great guy.

Flirting.

I was DJing a wedding. At this time I still had my piercings in. Started a friendly conversation with this hot girl over our piercings. Did not know she was married to one of the groomsmen. They got into a fight and left the hall.

This is what I got from other people at the party and the newspaper;

Down the road they stopped to continue fighting. This was out in the country so no street lights. Police come by and ask what is wrong...asks him to cross the road and wait while the police officer spoke to his wife. He calms down and come back on his own accord. Remember it's a dark road with no street lights and he is in a black tux. He did not look both ways. He meet the front end of a semi going 80kph. Right in front of his wife at 10:30pm...90 mins before their 1st anniversary. His twin brother was another groomsmen and collapsed when he heard. The reception ended. Bride and Groom could not change their honeymoon plans as they were leaving the next day.

The only person's life I've ever destroyed is my own.

I know a girl who got drunk for the first time.

Made out with a person in the grade above her.

It was her first kiss and she was pissed so she reported him for harassment.

He got deported to a military school.

I don't quite know how she lives with herself although i'm sure she feels she is self justified...

I was in a long term relationship with a girl that suffered from depression. Other than fairly rare incidences of her breaking down in tears for no discernible reason, it didn't really show itself much. She also had quite a bit of social anxiety.

Eventually our relationship faded and I made the decision to end it, which led to her behavior becoming increasingly bizarre (we shared a lease and foolishly attempted to live together for the last few months post-breakup), culminating in me finding her passed out on the living room floor with an empty wine bottle in one hand and a large kitchen knife in the other. I disarmed her, called her mother and demanded she drive 250 miles RIGHT NOW to collect her. Later I found out she tried to drive back to me while heavily medicated and had to be involuntarily committed.

Ten years later we finally spoke again through mutual friends, and eventually we grew comfortable enough to meet for a drink. She has never dated anyone else (I was her first relationship, first lover, etc.) and works 80+ hours a week. She makes quite a bit of money, drives a brand new luxury car, and owns a couple of nice properties. She has no friends and no social life, and her relentless work schedule has begun to take a serious toll on her health.

I was too young to understand what sort of toll depression can take on a person, and I always wonder if I could have helped her if I had stuck it out a little longer. She had come quite a long way towards being more comfortable in social situations in the time we were together. I know that's not a good reason to continue a relationship, but dammit, when I met her I was partying my brains out every night, and dating her (a non-drinker) quite literally saved my life.

I wish I could have helped her the way she helped me.

I flipped an ATV and paralyzed myself. No, I'm not talking about destroying my life. My injury destroyed my husband's life. Poor guy. A disabled wife is not what he signed up for.

Constant criticism and lack of affection.

it doesn't matter how strong you are, it eventually gets to you.

Not me - but happened to two people I know - lets call them John and Jane. John was a real [jerk] (didn't know exactly how douchey until this incident) and started dating Jane when she was 14 and he was in his mid-20's (I know, gross). Anyway, they had a very long (on and off), dysfunctional relationship for years. He was always in her life whether they were dating or not and was just horribly controlling and generally awful. That is the background of the relationship.

So one day, John decided to go to law school. Despite being a total jackbag, he was a really smart guy. Got himself through law school and passed the bar on the first try. Just like most sociopaths, John was very well-known and liked by his peers, had no criminal record, etc.

Anyway, after years, John finally pushed Jane over the edge. She found out he was cheating on her with some new 14-15 year old girls. I guess I should mention that he was in his mid-30's by this time. So Jane took this information to the bar council and filed a complaint against him. When there is a complaint filed against an applicant in this jurisdiction, the applicant does not know the specifics unless enough evidence is found to confirm its legitimacy and a hearing is held. So basically he knew that he passed the bar exam but his character evaluation was being investigated. He didn't know why or who made the complaint.

Eventually, enough evidence was gathered to make a case against his admission to the bar. That was when he found out it was Jane who went to bar council and what she told them. They had a hearing where the other girls who were involved testified and confirmed the accusations. John was permanently denied admission to the bar in that jurisdiction (and it would likely be difficult to get licensed in another jurisdiction).

Normally i'm not a fan of public shaming or life ruining, but in this case, I do feel like justice was served. John wasted a lot of time and money trying to become a lawyer and now he never can. But he deserved what he got.

**tl;dr:** girl causes ex to buy a very expensive piece of paper

I work at for a medical insurance company. Destroying people's lives is my profession.

My mum got pregnant at 15. She had me two months after her 16th birthday. She tried college and the teachers even allowed her to bring me into the common area (her friend watched me while she was in class) but she didn't last longer than the first term.

She was attractive, sociable, intelligent, had aspirations. Her childhood was terrible and i'm sure she dreamed of escaping it. Instead she got stuck in the same small town with her own kid.

I didn't exactly ruin her life but i'm the result of her life being ruined. Im 27 now and shes 43. Shes doing ok but money isn't great. Although she loves me i cant imagine the ways she feels about it all sometimes.

I was a complete [jerk] to my younger brother growing up. Never physically a*****e, but always making sure that everyone knew that I was the best. Numero uno.

He pooped his pants until pretty late in life, which I was relentless about as a 10 year old (he was 6). I like to think that it didn't last too long into my adolescence... but I honestly don't remember. I think he really looked up to me and so when I made him feel stupid, he believed it.

Fast forward and I have now gotten my PhD from Harvard, and am a reasonably successful scientist. My brother has struggled for his entire adult life. He was kicked out of college after 2 semesters, became a born-again christian, married an absolutely awful woman that treats him like dirt (wonder where he learned to like that?), and hasn't held down a decent job in a looong time. My mother and welfare have supported him, his wife, and his two children now into his 30s.

He's back at college, but I don't know if he has any self confidence at all. He's doing better this time, but I can see it in his face sometimes that he hates himself. I know that I am not the only factor, however, as a scientist, I cannot dismiss or explain away the enormous role I played in demolishing his self worth at an early age.

If I ever have children, our family will only be allowed to compete against other families or groups. Within the family we will play cooperative games. I turned around in how I treated him before I could drive and have spent the 20 years since trying to help him get himself together, but it's easier to get the toothpaste out of the tube than to get it back in.

I wouldn't say I *ruined* her life, but I sure as hell didn't make it easy, and she's still struggling a bit.

My first ever relationship ended with very little drama after a year and a half. She said she didn't want to be in a relationship anymore, she needed some time to herself, she was still young, and so on. She had been struggling with some personal issues for a while, and needed some time to herself. Of course I said she should do what felt right, and I told her that I was there for her if she needed me. We then promised to remain friends.

We did remain friends, but I got a bit (very) depressed over the next few months, and ended up dropping out of school for a year. Not going to school, and not going out in the weekends, of course resulted in me seeing very little of that girl, and any of my other friends for that matter. In my mind, this was of course her fault, and I made sure to tell her that. This, strangely, did not make her come over to my house to see me, and so I did the only rational thing to me at the time, blamed her for all of my problems, said I was thinking of [taking my life], and that the only thing that could possibly stop me was if I could just see her again. So much for her getting some time to herself.

This went on for a year. It went on for a year, and I just got worse. Calling her useless, ruining her self esteem, just in general doing anything I could to try to break her. It reached the point where if we walked past each other in the street she would begin crying and running away.

8 months ago I stopped this. I was tired of her, and certain that the reason I felt so mad all the time was because she never answered my messages, of which I sent plenty. If I never saw her again, I would be so happy.

Over the next 6 or so months I realized what an idiot I was, and two months ago I hand wrote a 4 page letter, apologizing profusely, and trying to make everything right. Telling her she wasn't useless, making sure it was clear that I regretted my actions, and wanted to take them all back.

She accepted my apology. By no right in hell do I ever deserve her forgiveness, but I got it. I actually ran into her at a party a few weeks ago. I was there with my current girlfriend, and she was there with her new boyfriend, whom I hope is a better person than I am. We had a few drinks and enjoyed herself. She mentioned she was still struggling with some issues. I have never been so genuinely sorry about something in my entire life. I hope she turns out great in the end, and I will make sure I never become such a tragic, sad, demented excuse for a man ever again.

**I am so, so, sorry.**.

My first gf cheated on me but still had feelings for me so a few years later i convinced her to leave her fiance...then *NEVER* spoke to her again.

Bad break up. She told me she would say I hit her and forced myself on her. I took the messages to the police and filed everything I could against her. We aren't even out of high school and she already has 4 felonies because of me. Was it justified? You bet it was. Do I feel bad? You bet I do.

Edit: Felonies or misdemeanors. I know she has some felonies, I probably got confused with them. It happened a few years ago and I really don't want to remember.

Edit 2: She was 14 and I was 15. She knew what she was doing and it isn't uncommon for some kids that age to have felonies or misdemeanors.