Being cheated on by the person you love is hurtful, and it can turn your entire life upside down. However, an important part of the healing process involves accepting what has happened in order to move on and, hopefully, find happiness elsewhere. If you live every day with only revenge on your mind, it’s not good for anybody, even if it might feel justified. It’s even worse if you turn your children against your partner.
An anonymous woman went viral on r/TwoHotTakes after sharing how her twin daughters ruined their cheating dad and his mistress’s wedding day and honeymoon. The way they did this shocked many internet users who were horrified that the mom not only didn’t punish them but actually rewarded them for it.
Some people take revenge way too far and end up lashing out in ways that are not just unhealthy but straight-up toxic
Image credits: Johnstocker / envato (not the actual photo)
A woman shocked the net by sharing how she rewarded her twins who ruined her ex-husband's new wedding
Image credits: beautifulmomentstudio23 / envato (not the actual photo)
Image credits: [deleted]
Letting revenge and rage rule your life can lead to lots of misery for everyone involved
Let’s get on the same page on a few things. First of all, cheating is very hurtful to the people closest to you and can affect not just your partner but also your children. In this particular case, it seems like the twins started lashing out after their dad cheated on their mom and it ended in divorce.
According to the mom, her daughters even started bullying someone at school, and there’s no excuse for this. It’s impossible to know what the situation is actually like in that family, but from what the author has written about how she refuses to enforce any healthy boundaries when her daughters step out of line, there are a lot of questions about the ‘quality’ of her parenting.
Divorce is hard. Being a teenager is difficult. Watching someone you care about start a new family can be devastating. But this still doesn’t excuse being an awful human being.
Secondly, you may not agree with or condone what happened, but there are many injustices in life, and you have to come to terms with them. Living in perpetual anger isn’t just bad for your physical and mental health, it’s also going to impact your relationships negatively.
You don’t have to love the people your parents want to marry after their divorce, but you can try to be civil. And developing a relationship with them (if you want to) takes a lot of focused effort over a long period of time.
Thirdly, while revenge might sound appealing, it can often ring hollow. You have to ask yourself, after you get your villainous revenge, what happens next? After you’ve ruined your ex’s new relationship, what will you do then? At some point, you’ll have to move on with your life.
And though it might be hard and seem unfair, letting go of the hate you feel may be best for everyone involved. Of course, this doesn’t excuse someone cheating on you, but you do not have to sacrifice your future just to ‘get back’ at them.
There are lots of reasons why someone might cheat on their partner
Image credits: Curated Lifestyle / unsplash (not the actual photo)
One part of your healing process might be getting some professional help. Seeing a therapist who specializes in relationships and infidelity may help you a lot. It might also be worth considering seeing a family psychologist who has expertise dealing with divorce, teenage aggression, and the like.
Something else to note is that there is a world of difference between a harmless prank (where everyone laughs, nobody’s a victim, and it’s all fairly lighthearted) and the type of prank the author’s daughters pulled. Spiking someone’s food isn’t just immoral, it can also be illegal.
This sort of despicable behavior has to be called out, boundaries have to be enforced, and the parents have to take steps so that nothing of the sort gets repeated. Furthermore, rewarding this type of behavior sends the wrong message. Namely, that the mom will let her twins do anything they like, no matter how hateful, so long as they believe that they ‘deserve it.’
There are lots of reasons why someone might decide to be unfaithful to their partner. Some individuals cheat because they’re angry at their spouse, or they have low self-esteem and want to feel desirable.
Others walk the road of infidelity because they lack love at home, feel emotionally neglected, or aren’t fully committed to the relationship they’re in. Others might yearn for intimacy that they don’t get with their partner or simply cheat because they have the opportunity to be with someone else.
What are your thoughts on this entire mess of a situation, dear Pandas? How would you, as a parent, react if you found out that your kids had tampered with someone’s food or ruined an important event for them? What advice would you give the anonymous mom to at least try to turn things around for the better? Let us know in the comments below.
Some of the people who read the online story thought that everyone involved was a jerk
Many other readers called out the mom for her horrendous approach to parenting and life in general
A minority of people praised the author, but most readers disagreed with their take
