Parents often have good intentions when giving children some life suggestions. Unfortunately, sometimes these parents overestimate their life experience and get fixated on channeling one “recipe” for having a good life or their own vision for their children's life. It becomes increasingly challenging to communicate when parents try to resist acknowledging they might have been wrong about certain things even when presented with undeniable evidence. For this reason, sometimes it takes a considerable amount of willpower to first stick with one’s own vision and only later, after it’s already realized, expect others to see it too.
More info: Reddit
A man finally got his dream job, but his dad found it hard to acknowledge he was right to accept the offer
Image credits: Elvert Barnes (not the actual photo)
The man worked his way up from a dishwasher to lead caterer despite his dad's pressure to work in a factory for a slightly better salary
Image credits: Mr Vorland
Having all the built-up experience and passion for the job the man was offered the job on the spot
Image credits: Dan Davison (not the actual photo)
His new position included a lot of creative freedom and opportunities to grow in addition to being well-paid
Image credits: Mr Vorland
However, the first thing the man's father said was "50k a year seems kind of low, don't you think?"
Image credits: Jonathan Cutrer (not the actual photo)
The man had to explain that the salary was much higher than the factory jobs that his father has been pushing on him
This man shared his success story in finding a job he likes, which is truly inspiring for several reasons. Not only did he get his dream job, but he actually went a long way, working his way up from washing dishes to being lead caterer, where he was planning out recipes and meals for parties of up to 500 people every weekend. He resisted the continuous pressure from his father to take a job in line work or welding at the local factories for just a slightly better salary.
The man’s argument, that his job in the food industry was much more satisfying and worth the pay than the difficult work conditions in a hot factory, might seem obvious after the fact. However, it wasn’t necessarily so before the new job offer, especially while resisting pressure from people close to him, even more so, when facing that pressure on a daily basis.
One of the most satisfying parts of the story is the man’s new job opportunity coming his way unexpectedly, but not undeservedly. On the contrary, he was so prepared for a position of this sort that the opportunity almost came to him, as he didn’t even apply for it, but was given a job offer while simply having a conversation. The suggested position, obviously, was related to his field of interest. Even more so, it was probably two interrelated factors that played well in the story: the man’s passion for the job and, of course, his built-up experience in the food industry.
His new position had everything most people expect from a good job. He was able to do something he always wanted, it was full of creative freedom, and it included many growth opportunities as it was a historical site undergoing massive restoration and expansion and had national funding. Finally, he was given a $5000 higher salary than the one he suggested, thinking it to be ridiculously high, as well as bonus pay for certain things.
The man's father had to do the math 3 times before finally asking his Alexa, who confirmed it
Image credits: lulugal0870 (not the actual photo)
The man had to resist the urge to tell him "I told you so," knowing he never would have got this opportunity if he'd followed the father's advice
However, the story reaches its culmination when, having all these factors in mind, the first comment this man’s father made after his son accepted the offer was, “50k a year seems kind of low, don’t you think?” The man had to explain to his father that it’s much higher than all those factory jobs that he’d been pushing on him for years.
The father still could not accept it, and only after he did the math 3 times and finally ‘asked his Alexa’ did he finally come to the understanding that he was actually out of touch with reality here. The father made his last attempt to hold to his old view, saying he thought “it was closer to 70k a year” … But even this father had to finally acknowledge that one is not supposed to stick to misleading interpretations after they are proved to be wrong.
At this point, the man had to resist the urge to say “I told you so,” as he knew he never would have got this job opportunity if he'd followed his father’s advice and taken the job in a factory.
In his study, Donn E. Brolin discusses the importance of self-determination in transitioning from studying to work, showing the degree of self-determination to be an important factor affecting the success of an individual’s transition to work. As noted by the author, there is no one definition of self-determination. He brought up a few most cited definitions.
Ward defines self-determination as “both the attitudes which lead people to define goals for themselves and to their ability to take the initiative to achieve these goals”. Field and Hoffman defined self-determination as: “one’s ability to define and achieve goals based on a foundation of knowing and valuing oneself”.
Among the characteristics of a self-determined individual listed by Ward were: self-actualization, assertiveness, creativity, pride, and self-advocacy. Field and Hoffman listed six components promoting self-actualization: 1) know yourself, 2) value yourself, 3) plan, 4) act, 5) experience outcomes, and 6) learn.
The main moral of the story is probably not to never listen to one’s parents or ask other people’s advice, but to be selective about which advice to follow.
Some Redditors noted that the father could have been foreseeing career opportunities in a factory; however, this man made it clear he did not want such a career
