When the day finally comes that you introduce a new, tiny member into your family, it’s difficult to think about anything else. After waiting a long nine months (or perhaps even years if you’ve had challenges starting a family), there's nothing more magical than getting to hold your little one in your arms.
But despite how beautiful becoming a parent is, one dad seemed to be more interested in playing video games than being attentive during his son’s birth. Below, you’ll find a story that a new mom recently shared on Reddit, detailing how she got her ex kicked out of the hospital only hours after their son was born, as well as a conversation with Amy Morrison, founder of Pregnant Chicken.
This mom's ex was insistent on bringing video games into the hospital while she was giving birth to their son
Image credits: amenic181/Envato elements (not the actual photo)
So when he refused to leave his PlayStation in the car, she decided he didn't need to be there at all
Image credits: nastuffa/Envato elements (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Commercial-Grand-552
Labor typically lasts between 12 to 24 hours
Image credits: Ольга Жарикова/Pexels (not the actual photo)
Having a child should be equally exciting for both members of a couple. Being a parent will massively alter your life, and regardless of whether you’re a mother or father, you should be prepared to prioritize your little one over yourself for the rest of your days. But during pregnancy and birth, it’s impossible to deny that the parent carrying the child will have to take on a bit more.
Sure, the father might be working more hours or be responsible for baby-proofing the home. But Mom is the one who has to watch her body change, deal with increasing discomfort for 9 months and experience intense hormonal changes for the entire pregnancy, as well as during the time she’s breastfeeding if she chooses to do so. And when it comes to labor, she’s in for an extremely difficult day.
According to the Cleveland Clinic, mothers are typically in labor for an average of 12 to 24 hours for their first birth. If they have more children in the future, labor is likely to be a bit shorter, often ranging from 8 to 10 hours. Women experience early labor, which is usually the longest phase, followed by active labor and afterbirth. And as we all know, childbirth can be excruciatingly painful.
"Giving birth is no joke, and being a support person is a real job"
Image credits: Büşranur Aydın/Pexels (not the actual photo)
Healthline reports that it’s difficult to measure exactly how uncomfortable childbirth is, because it’s dependent on a number of factors, but the pain begins with the contractions. These might feel like intense menstrual cramps, causing a dull ache in the back and pressure in the abdomen and pelvis.
During active labor, moms might feel like their contractions are wrapping around their body, and they may even experience cramping and discomfort in their legs. And finally, when it’s time to push, moms feel an intense pressure that resembles the feeling of needing to use the toilet. But the pain might be even worse if a woman experiences an episiotomy or vaginal tearing, along with the muscle pain and fatigue caused by pushing.
To gain more insight into this situation, we reached out to Amy Morrison, founder of Pregnant Chicken, who was kind enough to have a chat with Bored Panda about what a non-birthing parent's role might be in the delivery room.
"Your primary role as a partner is support," Amy says. "Giving birth is no joke, and being a support person is a real job. You are there to encourage them before, during and after because labor can be a long haul. Advocate for them if you feel like they aren't being heard or need attention – hospitals are busy, and sometimes staff needs a heads up if things are going sideways. Empathize with them about how scary and overwhelming birth can be and let them know they are not alone."
"Never underestimate the impact you can make by helping someone through this transformative experience"
Image credits: Sơn Bờm/Pexels (not the actual photo)
We were also curious if hospitals typically allow parents to bring things like video games in while their partner is giving birth. "Every hospital has different rules, so it's hard to say how each one would feel about you hauling in a full gaming system so you can kill time while your child is being born," Amy noted. "Labor can be long, so I don't think there is any harm in bringing in something to keep you and your partner occupied, but a full gaming system feels a bit extreme. Like it or not, you are not the primary focus in this situation, and your only job is to make sure the person you are supporting is comfortable and happy."
We then asked the parenting expert if there's anything dads should know while waiting for the birth of a child. "Birth can be beautiful and life-changing, but it can also be tiring and terrifying and your roll as a support person is incredibly important," Amy shared. "Never underestimate the impact you can make by helping someone through this transformative experience."
In this situation, Amy believes that the dad is missing the point of his presence. "He's not waiting for a pizza; he's been invited to witness his child's birth, which is a privilege - not a boring inconvenience," she explained. "It's sad to read how little he thinks of himself and the impact he could have made in this situation."
This is not the first time a new father has decided that he couldn’t sit in the hospital without having video games to entertain him, and it probably won’t be the last. But we would love to hear your thoughts on this situation in the comments below, pandas. Do you think this dad deserved to be kicked out of the hospital? Feel free to share, and then if you’re interested in checking out another Bored Panda article discussing delivery room etiquette, look no further than right here!
Readers took the mother's side and were quick to call out the father for his immature behavior
