The greatest inventions of mankind in its entire history are usually thought to be, for example, the wheel, paper, printing, the internal combustion engine, the airplane and other similar stuff... forget it! Just forget it. The top ten greatest inventions simply must include online shopping and delivery services.
Now I will explain why. In fact, the less people communicate directly with each other, the less the temptation for various entitled and simply weird people to expose themselves in all their glory. After all, you won't demand any undeserved privileges from a chatbot! On the other hand, the fewer trips to stores, the fewer such complete masterpiece retail horror tales, a selection of which we're highly recommending to you today.
#1
When I worked at Home Depot, a pair of older men, about 50 or so, came into my department.
"How can I help you gentlemen today?" I ask.
One of them does a dramatic gasp and grumbles, "Well nothing now that you called us that awful word."
So I says, "I'm sorry. What can I do for you mother f*****s today?"
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287points
#2
Roughly ten years ago, I was the only manager on duty in a big box hardware store. Customer came in just before closing and demanded a same day dishwasher installation as she had relatives visiting the next day and was an "emergency".
Despite multiple attempts to calmly explain why we couldn't do that, she was adamant that all I had to do was call someone and make it happen... to the point where she was screeching at me, spit flying, etc.
I asked her to wait a minute, and left her at the appliance desk. I came back with a bottle of Dawn, a pack of sponges, and cleaning gloves. Gave then to her for free, told her there's nothing life threatening about washing dishes, and kicked her out of my store.
I thanked her as she stormed out too.
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271points
#3
A woman came to me and said that we had mislabeled a breakfast sandwich two days in a row and made her sick. She claimed that she was allergic to bell peppers and kept getting the bell pepper omelette sandwich instead of sausage egg and cheese.
then she said she still ate the sandwich and threw up in her car… both days in a row
she didn’t know how to read the signs for each properly (the one she wanted was the shelf above) and then she didn’t read the wrapper.
I honestly just explained how the labels worked and gave her a free sandwich. Life is hard, but it’s harder when you’re stupid.
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241points
Until now, no one has been able to reveal the secret why some people quite sincerely believe that the whole world should constantly provide them with some incredible benefits and preferences simply on the shaky basis that the world (in their head) revolves exclusively around them. Perhaps, when someone does make a coherent and logically sound theory, it will be an unconditional nomination for the Nobel Prize - but for now we are just accumulating material for observation.
#4
When I was working for Geek Squad, there was a lady who had brought in an iPhone that was completely soaked in water. This is around the time that they were killing the Geek Squad warranty for their phones, so we were told to deny any water damage or any phone that had find my iPhone still on it. Well I tried telling the lady "Due to the water damage, we will not be able to process this warranty fulfillment." So she looks at me and says. "Just run it anyways the last time you guys did this it went through and yall replaced it." I just told her. "Yes unfortunately we have new rules for this. I could get get in trouble for even filling out the paperwork. I could even get fired."
She shook her head. "I don't care if you get fired. I want my phone."
So I turned and looked at the next person in line. " Welcome to Geek Squad. How may I help you today?"
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205points
#5
Don't know if this counts, but I did "break character" while working as a cashier at Coldstone Creamery in college. At the time, and I don't know if they still do this, if anyone would tip any amount, the line crew would be expected to sing idiotic parody songs about ice cream to thank the customer, like, "If you like ice cream and gotta have it, clap your hands" [clonks scoopers twice on the counter].
I viewed it as ridiculous and demeaning, and literally told my boss that I wasn't going to ever do this, and that they can fire me if that's a problem. They put up with it since I was a really good cashier.
One day, this smiley boat-shoes suburbanite dad came in with his two sorority-looking daughters, and started lowering a folded DOLLAR BILL into the tip jar and said, "If I give you a dollar, will you sing a song for us?"
I just said, "No," with a completely straight face. Watching him slowly realize that I wasn't kidding, while slowly retracting the dollar from the tip jar is one of the funniest and most satisfying things I've ever seen.
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197points
#6
Worked for a lab that did COVID testing. Per HIPAA, you cannot give a test results over the phone. At least with the company I worked for test results could only be received by e-mail, fax, they can come pick up a physical copy, or you can send a physical copy.
A person called in wanting their result. They refused to give me their e-mail. Refused any option that I provided. I was told HIPAA is all part of the woke liberal agenda, and that I was being a dumb f*****g idiot, and a stupid liberal snow flake.
I took a deep breath, very calmly said, "I'm not going to lose my job today because of you." Then hung up the phone.
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175points
However, we seem to be able to roughly say with whom it all began. In 1909, Harry Selfridge opened his famous Selfridges department store in London, using many of the same techniques that are familiar to us retail customers of the 21st century, but which were an absolute novelty and gamechanger for the early 20th century. So, Selfridge came up with Christmas discounts, entertainment for customers' kids, restaurants and food courts right inside the store... and in another letter written in 1911, he first mentioned that very phrase "The customer is always right."
#7
Worked as a lifeguard, went in to save a submerged drowning lady. When I got her to the surface she started screaming that I was touching her inappropriately (literally just grabbed under her arms to pull her up), and she demanded that I let her go.
So I did. And down she went again.
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171points
#8
When I worked at a nursing home, I had an enraged elderly woman come down from her penthouse and lecture me about how I delivered her the wrong color of apples, and that green apples were meant for cooking and not eating. Maybe it’s a thing for rich people to only eat red apples or something. The irony is that her last name was Smith, and she was in fact a granny.
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168points
#9
Customer: “My order still hasn’t been delivered! This is inexcusable! I’ll never do business with (competitor) again! Now, what are you going to do about this?!”
“I’d be happy to take your order.”
“What?!!”
“This is Domino’s, Ma’am.”
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144points
Of course, it was nothing more than a spectacular publicity stunt, and it paid off one hundred percent - but since then, many people seem to seriously believe that "The customer is always right" is something like the eleventh commandment. And even when they do some kind of utter nonsensical act with incredible whims - they are firmly confident in their infallibility. Because - you know, the customer is always right. And if the customer is somehow wrong, then we return to the previous point...
#10
Around Thanksgiving, the grocery store I worked at offered free turkeys if you spent a certain amount. Some lady waited until the night before, right before closing to pick hers up. We didn't have anymore, I knew this.
Well, when she asked, I told her we didn't have anymore. This was not sufficient for her. I tried to tell her that she wasn't the first person to ask, so I knew we didn't have any. She continued to insist that I go get one from the back. She knew we had some and that I was too lazy to do my job.
Well I said no. She said "I am not happy, what are you going to do about it"
I looked at her said "nothing" and walled away while she yelled I was ruining her Thanksgiving. I mimicked a crying face and never saw her again.
133points
#12
Back when I worked at Subway, I had someone literally throw change at me. She didn't like how much I charged her for her sandwich. So I gave her a refund, by throwing it. Then I threw the sandwich away. She called me a selfish b***h, I called her a truck stop h**ker.
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110points
No, we do not want to say that retail employees are innocent victims of cruel clients' tyranny. Not at all - there are many stories about how the store staff also turn to the dark side of the Force (anyone except Alley from Walmart, of course - she's just perfect). But today, we are just talking about some good old-fashioned 'Karen' stories from the retail world - so please feel free to scroll this selection to the very end, and maybe add something thrilling and bizarre based on your own life experience. After all, to paraphrase Harry Selfridge, 'the commenter is always right'.
#13
I worked at a medical office at the very beginning of COVID. It was, to put it lightly, a s**t show. No one knew what was going on. Not the government, not us, nobody. Patients would call in asking for resources that simply didn’t exist yet, asking about protocols that were ever changing. They were understandably frustrated, but as just a receptionist, so was I.
A woman at the height of her angry phone call to me said, “You people really need to get it together and get on the same page.”
I lost it. I started word vomiting, “Yeah, ma’am, I would love that. I would absolutely love it if everyone was on the same page and knew what they were doing right now, and that we all had the same information. But unfortunately that’s not the reality right now.” She didn’t quite know what to say to that and honestly, neither did I.
110points
#14
Parking Attendent/Security guard for a bougie downtown parking garage underneath a bank. Lady had a $2 parking charge but was demanding it be free as the previous day it was free due to a 'farmers market free parking rate' which is only in effect during that day of the week the farmers market is open. I calmly explained that the farmers market was yesterday and that she still had to pay for parking today.
She then went on to let me know that she personally held more than half of the money in the bank above, and that she would use all her money and power to "destroy your life". She went through various stages of grief, threatened to destroy my life a few more times before finally paying the TWO DOLLAR CHARGE. As they were leaving the little toddler in the back seat squeaked "thank you mister" and I went home that night and cried myself to sleep.
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104points
#15
I made a customer service rep break character. I was waiting for my cable modem to start up while on the line with them. My wife walked by with our 2yo, naked and ready for a bath. I walked over and commented to kiddo, "You've got broccoli on your balls". The rep laughed for at least five minutes. Good times!
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100points
#16
One time a customer told me he was an idiot, so I responded that, “The customer is always right.”
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97points
#17
I work in an arcade that also has a restaurant and bar. We get a wide variety of s****y guests, but the majority of guests are great and just there to have fun.
Management is great and I don’t think any employee has ever gotten in trouble for not being perfectly polite to a rude guest. They firmly uphold the rule that if you’re rude to the staff, you leave.
We don’t have to keep up a character as management has realized that if we’re relaxed and enjoying work, it helps the guests have more fun. That said, my favourite is rich, entitled guests who think they can get anything they want, and don’t know how to handle being told “no.” Most often it’s them wanting to be able to pay cash for prizes. Our system isn’t even set up to redeem anything but tickets/points for prizes. The cash system is on a completely separate computer.
I’ve been there for 5 years, I know our rules, and what’s in my power. I love seeing them get more upset and rude as I just stand there, knowing I’m right and won’t be punished no matter how much they complain, and simply tell them they can either drop it and go have fun, leave right now, talk to my manager who will say the same thing, or wait for security and/or police. That’s the only paths forward, you’re not getting what you want, so just pick one. I’m getting paid and enjoying this whole process either way.
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97points
#18
I worked in DTLA at a pseudo upscale restaurant. It was food and wine's big shindig so lots of "foodies" in town. This dude comes in for lunch with three escorts and he actually knows the owners and the somm. They drink copious amounts of wine from 1130 am until around 7pm. They eat very little. I have been at work for almost eleven hours when they finally finish up, and they only do this because the manager suggests it's time for them to leave. He wanted to split the wine and the food up on to different bills because he didn't want to tip me on the cost of the wine because I "didn't really do anything with the wine."
He was so lucky the somm stepped in and insisted he tip me appropriately. I was lucky too or I would have lost my job that night.
He was so lucky the somm stepped in and insisted he tip me appropriately. I was lucky too or I would have lost my job that night.
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85points
#19
Me: Delivery will be 90 minutes or less.
Customer: I've been waiting for one hour and driver is not here yet.
81points
#20
A customer once told me that they hoped I died of COVID-19 because I refused to issue them a refund on a product they had damaged themselves.
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78points