#1
I had to say no, we had Uni soon and obviously we were far too young. This really hurt our relationship and made it extremely awkward for the next month and somewhat for the next year but I think he grew to understand it and be thankful that I refused as we moved in two years after that and struggled a lot with money and University.
He proposed again when I was 25 when he took me to the lake where we met with the friend who introduced us, Kaitlyn and all our loved ones showing up after I said yes. We were together for 16 years altogether, married for 6 and had a gorgeous girl. Unfortunately, he died in a car accident on the way to work.
Sorry to make this all long but ours is the only relationship I know of that didn't fall apart after an untimely proposal.
Edit: Thank you everybody for your kind wishes and merry Christmas to you all! Also thank you to kingmario75 for the gold although I do not know what to do with it! :P.
I recently heard about someone who got married this year at the tender age of 67. It’s not because they waited for decades for their Prince or Princess Charming to come galloping down the tree-lined driveway on a shiny, white horse. It’s also not because they were going gray waiting for the love of their life to finally pop the question. On the contrary, this woman has had numerous proposals in her life. All from the same man. Each time and every time, she backed out.
You see, this “spinster” was fine with being called that, by friends, family and her generation of society at large. As long as she didn’t have to tie any knots. In case you’ve never heard the word, the Oxford dictionary’s definition of spinster is a derogatory and outdated name for an “unmarried woman, typically an older woman beyond the usual age for marriage”.
So what eventually led her down the aisle in the twilight of her life? Bored Panda tracked her down and she agreed to tell us, provided we call her “Kate”.
#2
My Mom and dad were in a car crash. When my mom went in for x-rays they did test first and found out she was pregnant with me. When my dad found out he proposed to her on the spot neck brace and all. She said no, explaining that she diddnt want to get married just because she was pregnant. My dad started to cry explaining that he had plans to propose on Valentines day and already had a ring. A week later she accepted and they've been married for 22 years.
Every love story has a beginning so naturally, we asked Kate to start with hers. “We had met at school and had very little interaction. All I can remember was that he was very naughty. He got married and had two children. I met him again just after his divorce was in progress. He actually stopped the traffic so that I could get across a very busy intersection,” she told us.
“He phoned me a few months later and I was determined to get him together with a friend who had also recently gotten divorced, but they did not hit it off. We went out as friends for a while before it turned into more than friends and the first time he mentioned marriage was about 6 months after we started ‘dating’. It was the furthest thing from my mind, so I tried to change the subject.”
#3
He's also called me a tampon in his sleep, so it's not always cute.
#4
Already bought the ring...Took it back to the shop I bought it from and kind of broke down trying to explain why I had to return the ring. The girl at the counter demanded to take me out for drinks that night and we had a great time getting pissed whilst laughing at my whole situation.
3 days later, today, she (ring shop girl) left me a message asking if I want to take an impromptu trip away with her over New Years.
Have been staring at the message all day now.
“About three years later in 2001, we went away for a weekend for my birthday, and the evening of my birthday, he produced a ring, went down on one knee, and asked me formally to marry him. To say I was completely taken by surprise is an understatement. I had packed, where had he hidden the ring?? In his boot apparently!! When we got home, my entire family was at home with goodies to eat and to celebrate. He had told them that he was going to ask me, and quietly let them know that I had said ‘Yes’. I remember my father asking me that night ‘Are you happy, sweetheart?’. ‘Gobsmacked’ was more like it, but I did not answer.”
It wasn’t long before Kate regretted her decision. “I suddenly realized I did not want to get married, to be known as ‘Mrs O’. I rather liked my name and wanted to keep it. Also being in charge of my own finances was important to me,” she revealed.
“Over the years he asked me a few times again. I think it was the 5th time that he said he would never ask me to marry him again. I felt I had dodged a bullet.”
#5
#6
kinda f****d up they acted that way, no one knew their story. they could have been on their third date and he was a weirdo or some s**t.
“He proposed more than 5 times, because even though he said he would not do so again after the 5th time, it did come up again in conversation, especially in 2017 when his family also put pressure on us. That year, the subject came up again seriously and he wanted me to set a date. I asked him to give me about 10 months to get over the stress we were having with a client. Needless to say the stress never stopped,” said Kate, adding that she managed to keep the stress going for another five years.
#7
I dropped my credit card on the table and ran after her.
Outside I talked her down, let her realize I was only talking about it and was not proposing. Within a year we were ready for an engagement and she said yes immediately.
We have been married for 7 years and things are going great, happy every day together.
#8
#9
My parent's engagement story is the least romantic one I've ever heard.
They'd only been dating for five weeks at the time, and my dad, without giving her a ring, asked very casually if she'll marry him, and for some reason she said yes. By the way, this didn't go down at a romantic fountain or over a classy dinner. No, it was in my dad's truck right before he dropped her off at home after the date. There was no kneeling, no ring, obviously not much thought put into it. And she said yes.
He then called her the next day to say that he's been thinning about it, and he wants to take back his proposal.
A few days later he changed his mind again and proposed for a second time. And even then, she still said yes.
I don't know how a couple with such a horrible engagement story has lasted now 26 years and are still what everybody calls "the cutest couple."
EDIT: For those who have asked, their relationship is still super strong. My parents have done a bunch of romantic gestures for each other since then (it just happens that this particular gesture was less than romantic). Just two years ago they celebrated their 25th and they renewed their vows and they promised each other at least another 25. They're both great parents and great spouses. I guess it's just not true what they say, that the only couples that make it are the ones who have a cute story.
By the way, their meeting story is also pretty lame. My mom showed up to church for the first time in a neck brace after being in a car accident, and my dad thought asking her if she needed prayer was the perfect opportunity to "get to know the cute new girl." He then said "how does your boyfriend feel about you coming to church by yourself with a broken neck?" To which she responded "I don't have a boyfriend." They were engaged five weeks later.
“In 2023, he arranged for a cruise for us to the Mediterranean and when we got back, he gave me an ultimatum. I married him or he was leaving. I um'd and ar'd and he moved out. He told me he would move back once we were married.” That was a turning point for Kate…
#10
#11
So I work in an airport in International Arrivals, so daily I see joyous reunions that are so filled with love that it makes me want to puke. (Can you tell I've been working there for a long time?)
One day, I'm sitting in my store minding my own business, when all of a sudden I hear a trombone. I've seen people play guitar, ukulele, saxophone, and the one time a drum set; but I've never heard a trombone in international arrivals. So the song starts going, and I recognize the tune... It's the Imperial March from Star Wars. I'm confused as f**k, and trying to find out where the hell this is coming from, so I'm scanning the crowd when I see this girl who's face is beet red. I'm assuming she has something to do with whatever the hell is happening, so I keep my eyes on her.
She ends up walking to this guy who (surprise) is playing the trombone. He finishes up the song, passes his trombone to the person next to him (I'm assuming it was his friend), and then gets down on one knee. The girl is about 25 feet away from me, so if there were words exchanged, I did not hear it. *But*, what I did see was the guy smiling, then suddenly look dejected, stand up and walk away from the girl while she just stood there with her face still red like a tomato.
That was super awkward to watch..
**TL;DR Don't propose by playing the Imperial March**.
#12
We walked down a beach like normal, it was pretty packed. An airplane flys by with a "Tiffany, Will you marry me? -Tom." She just screams yes, hugs me, and i'm just like W....T....Fuuuuuu..... Staring at the sky not even realizing she has her arms around me. She looks in my eyes and finally figures it out. Quietest, longest, most painful walk home of my life. Wish someone would drown or a boat would explode on fire to change the mood.
What a f****d up coincidence.
“When he moved out, the house was silent and I realized that I really did love and miss him,” she explained. “I decided it was time to find out the legalities of marriage, viz. the antenuptial contract, retaining my name, etc. I found a lawyer to do the contract and found a priest who would marry us at home and one of the first questions he asked was, ‘will you be retaining your name??’ As soon as the ANC was signed, he moved back and we were married 3 months later, in April 2024. I had work commitments which ended on 31 March. We had been engaged for 23 years. Not exactly ‘Guinness Book of Record’ stuff, but close.”
#13
And then he proposed to me about a... year I think into dating - He would hop from upstate NY to ottawa canada to date me. He did it over dinner, no ring, asked me to marry him. He didn't get a ring because I suspect he was worried the same thing would happen. And it did. I told him no, right now I couldn't begin to entertain that, I wasn't sure if he was the one and that I didn't think I was in the right place. He was sad but not devestated. He told me a few years ago that I hadn't actually said no per say but gave him an 'ask me later'. So he waited. Till his birthday after slyly having me pick out my own ring. We will be celebrating ten years in a few months.
Oh, and he eventually did become an Officer. Too bad she didn't say yes. So glad she didn't or I wouldn't have my sweet husband. Did I mention my inlaws love me? And I them.
#14
Supposedly they had been on only a few dates and he just randomly proposed.
#15
But now he's dating a Miss America contestant and I recently saw that ex girlfriend and she was working at a Claire's, and she told me all about her boyfriend who sells phone cases at the stand in the mall. So I guess it all works out in the end.
We asked Kate why she eventually gave in. “It was a shot-gun marriage really – he held a gun to my head. That was it. Not sure that I would have gotten married otherwise. At 67, it seemed pointless,” she answered. “Since we got married, very little has really changed, except that we do not argue that much anymore. I think when we saw the old couple in the wedding photos, we realized we may not have long to live and so we should try to enjoy our last days!”
#16
Now generally I'm not a soup eater (just not enough substance to it) but when I do I prefer a creamy potato or chowder. One day this girl brings in the most dank chicken noodle that rocked my world and then some. Immediately I was smitten. She'd opened my eyes. I couldn't stand the thought of never experiencing this magical pseudo-food water dish again so I popped the question. Turned out she had a boyfriend. I never got the recipe. My heart is still broken. Are you out there Brooke? Does he treat you like you should be treated when you're slaving over a pot of veggies and chicken stock? I may have moved away to Chicago, but my love for your interpretation of this classic comfort food knows no limits.
#17
So what’s her advice for people who feel pressured into accepting a proposal? “Whereas we did not discuss the reason(s) I did not want to marry, I can only suggest that couples should discuss the issues for keeping them from making that decision,” she advised.
“If it is finance, discuss it and come to an amicable decision the way we did. If it is retaining your name, don’t back down!! Whatever the issue, in our work we find solutions, so try to find a middle ground if you love each other.”
#19
So, my boyfriend had flown out to my hometown where I was spending the summer so he could spend some time with me. I was playing Ocarina of time (I was 23?) And he came in the room and asked me to go for a walk. I said yes, paused my game, and he said "Not yet. In a bit." I raised an eyebrow, and went back to my game. By the time I was fighting that first spider boss, he then was ready to go. Well, now I was neck deep in the first big boss of my game. I said wait, he said he wanted to go, and I suggested he take my sister (ha!).
So we walk down to the ocean as the sun is setting, and he is being romantic, and he asks me if I was happy in our relationship. Sigh ... my best friend had just had this serious talk with me the night before, lamenting all of the things she could see wrong with how serious he and I were. She was even trying to convince me to date one of her friends ... and I had been with my SO for a while at this point. So, much to his chagrin, I said that yes, I wished we could work on a few things. He looked devastated. I said we needed more time for fun, we needed to chill a bit. He said he'd work on it. Then, as we hugged, I could feel him shaking. Ohhhh, the panic set in. He then got down on one knee, and I cried. Not the overjoyed, jumping up and down crying, either. I will never get the slump-shouldered look of dejection on his face out of my head.
So I confessed that the idea of marriage terrified me. I felt I was young (hello, Zelda) and all around me, all I saw were failed marriages. His dad left his mom for his eighteen year old Secretary, for crying out loud. But I told him that I absolutely loved him, and couldn't imagine being with anyone else. Then I asked if I could try it on.
I wore the ring, showed my mom, and we gradually just 'were' engaged, I guess. He is the best husband I could ever ask for ... and I ruined what should have been one of the biggest moments of our lives. :(
(Phone post. Apologies for any autocorrect craziness) (Edited to fix some random crazy word corrections).
#20
3 months later, she told me she had fallen in love with her soul mate - a married man she met at her internship. For 3 months I tried to make her see my love for her, waking up early every morning to make her breakfast, date nights every weekend, and in the end she still chose him.
It's probably better this way.
I'm moving out of our apartment over this break, while she's home with family. It's times like this that you realize how important family and true friends are. Merry Christmas to everyone who feels alone and rejected out there - there are people who love you too.
While Kate did eventually cave, she still maintains marriage doesn’t matter to her. “I do not feel any different about who I am. I do feel that it’s made a difference to him. He is more laid-back and laughs more. Thinking about it now, I’m not sure that is a good thing,” she joked.
“Ours is not a great love story as we sort of drifted into it, but it is a story of love and hugs and I do get more hugs now. Also, I can answer my dad now: Yes, daddy, I actually am happy.”