Some of these “nice girls” exhibit behavior similar to “pick me” girls or “not like other girls” women. All of this behavior stems from internalized sexism, and none of it is healthy for women or men. Apoorva Phutela wrote an article for Feminism In India earlier this year exploring this idea, and she noted that one of the common ways this sexism manifests is through moral policing. “Independent and assertive women being labeled as ‘too loud’ and ‘too bossy’ by women who have conformed to patriarchal gender roles, reinforce sexist attitudes in the society,” Apoorva writes. “Instead of encouraging their daughters to be ambitious and independent, mothers are often seen asking them to ‘adjust’ and be ‘homely’ in order to sustain marriages.”
#22 So Sweet For Showing The Red Flags Herself, Atleast It’s Only Slightly
#24 I Have 0 Recollection Of Who This Girl Is But She Sure Made Me A Bit Uncomfortable
But it can be hard for these “nice girls” to deconstruct a lifetime of sexist teaching. “Internalized sexism is harder to recognize and dismantle because when the victims become the perpetrators of the same kind of oppression that they have endured, they become the agents of patriarchy hoping for some kind of reconciliation with their own trauma or validation from their male counterparts for repeating the same actions that traumatized them.” The women on this list don’t have an excuse for being cruel or hateful towards others, but when we understand where it stems from, we can work on correcting it and helping future generations avoid the same brainwashing.
Are these posts reminding you of anyone in your own life? If they are, it might be helpful to have an honest conversation with them about how their behavior might be having a negative effect on themselves and the people around them. These nice girls likely mean well, but they have a bit of learning to do. Keep upvoting the posts you find particularly shocking or cringey, and let us know in the comments below if you’ve ever encountered “nice girls” who might belong on this list. Then, if you haven’t already checked out our previous publications featuring the same subreddit, you can find those right here and here!
