47 Embarrassing Moments When Parents Didn’t Realize How Cringey They Were

Unfortunately, not everyone who has kids turns out to be a good parent. Yes, the world is full of loving, kind, caring, selfless, and supportive moms and dads out there. They’re far from perfect, but they try their best to do what’s right.

However, there are plenty of negative examples out there, too. Parenting can change you. But just because someone has children doesn’t instantly turn them into a self-aware, personal growth-oriented, empathetic, and altruistic individual.

To be clear, every parent struggles and makes mistakes. And if you have enough self-awareness to wonder whether you’re a bad parent, you’re likely not.

The most obvious signs of bad parenting include neglect and physical and emotional violence, and they need to be immediately reported to the authorities. However, other red flags are much more subtle and indirectly harmful.

Helicopter parents, for instance, are over-involved in their children’s lives. They supervise and micromanage their decisions. This stops their kids from making mistakes, learning from them, and becoming more independent.

Something else to be wary of is the lack of discipline at home. As psychotherapist Sharrom Frederick, LCSW, explained to Healthline, “Children look to parents to define what boundaries are and the consequences that can occur if the child crosses those boundaries.”

Little to no discipline at home means few (if any) boundaries. The result is kids who grow up not understanding boundaries.

However, the opposite situation can be damaging, too.

Just as no discipline can be harmful, so can too many strict rules in the household. People who embrace the authoritarian parenting style can be too rigid and don’t allow their kids to explore their world. These parents typically enforce very harsh consequences for breaking rules.

The result? Children who feel powerless. They are more likely to be anxious, fearful, or even rebellious.

Meanwhile, a parent’s love should be unconditional. That doesn’t mean a lack of guidance or allowing your kids to do anything and everything, but it does mean you will support them through thick and thin.

The sad reality is that some parents make their affection and attention conditional. They withdraw it when their munchkins don’t do what they’re told.

“Ignoring a child is telling them that your love is conditional. These types of behaviors can cause a child to have low self-esteem and low confidence, which can result in a child not expressing their wants and needs,” Frederick stressed.

The consequences can be severe. For example, this withdrawal of affection can lead to codependency. In a nutshell, the child will adapt their behavior and act the way they believe someone else wants them to act.

Yet another bad parenting red flag is shaming. Parents who criticize their kids, yell at them, or even hit them in private or public can harm their development.

Children who are constantly shamed by their parents can develop anxiety or depression. What’s more, they might develop a fear of failure and an unhealthy relationship with perfectionism.