50 Women Reveal Their Worst Experiences With 'Nice Guys'

Met 'Bill" at a friends party. There was definite attraction so we started dating. We really had fun - it seemed like we could make a good life together. After a year together he asked me to move in with him and it looked like a good idea. The first night in his house he had me by the front of my shirt up against a wall laying down the law about how things would be from now on.

It's like the niceness was a front to get me exactly where he wanted me - under his roof and his rules. He seemed to think that he now owned me. That sure didn't work for me. I packed up and got out within days.

Met this guy online through one of my friends. He seemed pretty nice, so I would text him periodically throughout the day and he wanted to video chat once so we did.

He became obsessed with me and wanted to call every night before he went to bed. He told me I would be the perfect wife and that we should have 3 kids. He wanted to move me out to the cattle ranch he owned and operated so we could get married and start a family. We had been talking for maybe two weeks.

I was looking for a job to get through college and jokingly shared a "now hiring dancers" sign at the local strip club on Snapchat. He went ballistic and told me he couldn't be with a girl who had no respect for herself. We weren't even dating, but he "broke up" with me on my birthday.

Luckily I haven't been had to deal with anything too terrible, but...

There was this guy last year that got on the westbound bus a little after I did, and then we got off at the same stop and waited together for the northbound bus.

He was nice. He was friendly. He took an interest in the classes I was taking. I kinda viewed him as this kind of grandfatherly type of man, since he was in his 60s or 70s. I'm in my late twenties, for reference.

One night, I had to go to the store that's right by that bus stop we waited together at. I got stuck behind someone who took a while in line, so I was rushing to make the bus (because even though it's a "Time Point," where they're supposed to stop and wait if they're ahead of schedule, some of the drivers don't).

I'm running up, and the driver did actually wait like he was supposed to. He was taking a smoke break out by the stop, and said, "Don't worry, the old guy let me know you were coming."

Awesome, super nice, right? I go in, old guy says pretty much the same thing: he let the driver know I'd be out shortly, and the driver decided to take a smoke break while they waited.

Then the old guy passed me a note, told me to read it when I got home.

It said, "Does that deserve a kiss someday?"

I know that's not the worst thing in the world, but...

I started taking a later bus. It meant I didn't get home until about nine, but I didn't have to deal with him anymore.

I was dating a LDS guy (Mormon), and assumed that he'd want to have fun and get to know each other without the physical stuff. (I was taking a casual sex break.) After a little over a month, were making out (a common occurrence) and he decided to just penetrate me without discussion or consent. Yes, I realize that's r*pe. He called the next day to tell me I was too tempting and that he didn't want to see me anymore because I jeopardized his "place in heaven, and made him less worthy of a pure woman."

I went to a pretty small college in northern Colorado. My freshman year I befriended a nice guy named R. R ended up pledging with a fraternity. I went on a couple of dates with a guy from R's frat I thought things were going well then the guy I dated just stopped responding to me. A bunch of other people involved in the Greek community and lots of people in my dorm started giving me funny looks or conversations would end as soon as I came in the room. Apparently R was pissed that I wasn't dating him so he told everyone I had AIDS. I ended up transferring schools because of that guy.

Throwaway for obvious reasons - because I know you're on reddit.

He was my best friend since the age of like 4 or 5 (same age) and practically family. I had a shitty adolescent time, drank too much way too young and hung out with bad people, I lost almost all of my friends except this guy who stuck by me through thick and thin. Called me to check on me, always invited me to game nights, told me I was okay, made me feel alright again. He never pressured me to do anything with him, nothing like that at all even tho there were plenty of other guys who did. We'd talk on the phone several times a week until the end and I was adamant we were only friends - he was fine with this and was dating and all of that. Cue a few years ago.

I had a mental breakdown one night and he came over to help me out but started acting weird. Wanted me to cuddle in bed next to him to feel "closer to each other" (he had a steady girlfriend and im not okay with this either way) and gets upset about it, all while im crying and shaking uncontrollably on the couch.

We have a weird relationship for a few months where im not comfortable seeing him anymore but we still talk. One night I decided to invite him over to watch a movie like old times.

He sexually assualted me. He forced me to take off my bra and then pegged me underneath him on the couch. Did it matter that I said no, and did he care? No, he deserved it and he had been a nice guy, a friend, for so long. I said a loud no and it didnt matter, he wanted to do it again sometime, maybe regularly if I didnt mind.

I havent talked to him or you in years. I'll never forgive you.

I was potentially interested in an acquaintance. Spent some time with him, decided I didn't want to date him, said no when he asked me out. He kept calling me up to tell me he could see I was broken and he was going to save me

I was dating this guy, really nice, we move in together. Awesome!

He expects me to cook all the food, buy all the groceries, take care of all the bills, and do all the housework. He occasionally takes a break from his busy schedule of drinking beer and watching sports to tell me I need to go to the gym/stop eating (I wear a size 2); he also criticizes my housekeeping abilities and constantly tells me how poorly my parents raised me (I'm a successful woman with a masters degree, he barely graduated high school and has never had anything other than an entry-level non-skilled job).

The kicker: he told me he was just being nice and trying to help me, because he cared so much about self-improvement.

Needless to say, we are no longer together.

Had (what I thought was) a friend who lived in my building. Did normal friend things. Walked to class together, had movie nights etc...

Had a movie night one night while my roommate was away, and got a super weird vibe from him. Told him I forgot I needed to get up early and asked him to leave earlier than planned.

I have anxiety, so I couldn't sleep and decided to spend the night deep cleaning my apartment (while muttering sorry to my neighbors for vacuuming at 1am)

Found he had hidden things all over my house. My only guess was so he had an excuse to come back, like in Seinfeld? Maybe, Idk. But it was a whole box of things. I went to put them outside in the hall and t3xt him it was out there and discovered he had turned the lock off on my door. (It was set up like the inside of the door had a button you could press so you didnt get locked out bringing out the trash.)

I basically stopped talking to him anymore, and one day I was bringing in groceries, which he normally asked to help with, and instead he punched me in the a** cheek so hard I almost fell down and dropped everything.

I've always been a tomboy and grew up with a lot of male friends. Since reaching adulthood, I've also grown some breasts.
This combination of things has led to most of my best guy friends asking me if they could finally see my tits "since we've been friends for so long." and subsequently vanishing when I said no. It's depressing enough when I realize that a guy I'm into just wants to bang, but it really hurt when the guys I thought were actual human beings, with whom I'd developed deep multi-year friendships, were just sexually frustrated animals. So yeah, I've got some trust issues now.

Long story. So I was young and started a new part time job. One of the guys who worked there took an interest in me. He was cute but very shy and quiet. We started talking and after a few months had our first date. We dated for roughly 2 months before we slept together (my first time), he came over the next day and said he was getting back together with his ex. so we couldn't see each other anymore. He said our time together was mainly about sex so it shouldn't be a big deal that we still worked together (WTF?). Turns out he had broken up with his ex the day of or before our first date. The creepiest part is that he had worked at that job for months before I did and never mentioned to anyone that he had a girlfriend. He had intended to cheat/ replace her before he even had someone in mind. Now he's been single forever and still posts on facebook about how women don't appreciate him or overlook him despite all he has to offer.... He has had a sexual harassment scandal at every job he's worked at that I'm aware of.

Became friends with this guy in college. After graduation he got a job and moved in with his girlfriend about an hour's drive from where I was in grad school. I drove out one Saturday to see him, did some cool things, grabbed some food. He waited until his girlfriend was in the bathroom before he told me the following: my boyfriend probably had a low sperm count due to his profession, and if I ever wanted a family, he'd always be willing to "take me back" even though we'd never been together.

Yeah, haven't seen him since.

Edit: for those who are having a hard time parsing this - Nice guy says MY boyfriend probably has low sperm count, offers to start family with me.

So my best nice guy experience was a guy I actually did try to date.

We went out once, he didnt have a lot going on (no job, no college, pending assault charges in another state for a 17 year old girl) which he let me know on the first date. I decided that maybe now wasnt the best time for him to be dating but he was funny and nice so I said lets stay friends.

He agreed at first but then...

He started calling and texting me constantly. Whenever I didnt wanna hang out with him it was because I was too busy 'being a s**t and catching chlamydia". As soon as I would respond he would apologize and be nice...for like 5 seconds. This continued, got worse, and I eventually just blocked his number.

He of course just started calling and texting off random phone numbers. One night when I had ignored him all day he left me a voicemail telling me what I was wearing that day and then going into detail about how he wanted to kill me and assault and also end my young childs life.

I had to change my number and file a police report to get him to leave me alone. Thats what I get for trying to find love on okcupid.

Pretended to be nice to get my number....for a YouTube channel. Called me a b***h when he was denied and now it has 2mil views.

That one time he tried running me over with a truck when I was on holiday.

I went to an extremely conservative and small college. Our freshman class was pretty tiny as in you would know everyone by name in your class.

There was a guy I met on the first day of class and he seemed nice. We had a usual conversation (nothing out of the ordinary). Two days later, he texted me. I never gave him my number and the only person who had my number was my roommate and she swears she never gave him my number.

Cue the constant messages asking me how my day was and if I wanted to meet up or hang out. I politely told him that I didn't want to date anyone at the moment and I was focused on school.

He didn't give up. For FIVE years. He messaged me with different numbers, emails, and send me letters. He would threaten every single guy who would talk to me.

Worst part was when I learned that he and his frat buddies had announced to everyone in the first week of freshman year that I was his girl and that I was off the market.

Pretty much ruined my college experience in terms of having a social life.

I'm paranoid about leading people on. I'm petite with large breasts and doe eyes so I seem to give the 'young exploitable anime girl' vibe.

I hung out with a guy (we watched mighty boosh and chatted) Before he came over I literally said "I am not looking for a relationship. Please don't ask to be more than friends" as I had recently gotten out of a long term relationship.

Of course that apparently translated to him asking me out via text as soon as he got home. Upon politely declining, I was subjected to every sexual slur you could think of whilst being told what an idiot I am for passing up such a stand up guy.

Thus began his two year campaign of stalking.

I was flirting with a guy I met online, he wanted me to go out with him that night but I had just had knee surgery a couple days before, he then asked if he could come to my house and keep my company, I said no because I lived with my mom and little sisters and didn't feel comfortable having a stranger in the house with the little girls. He freaked the f**k out at that point. Called me a wh**e and a s**t and every other name in the book. I was like, Dude I was gonna say lets go out in a week when I can actually walk but not anymore you d***head.

I was hanging out at a bar that I go to pretty often with a couple of my other friends. Guy struck up a conversation with me he was friendly and I was friendly back. We started discussong relationships and I told him I was married and then things turned weird. I was looking at something on my phone and he grabbed my phone from my hand called his phone with my phone refused to give me my phone back, I got pretty upset. Bartender who knew me grabbed my phone out of his hand told him to get out before the guy left he grabbed me and kissed me. In a situation like that I want to think that I would nut check the dude but in actuality I froze up I was shocked and felt so goddamn violated. One of my friends pulled me away and the bartender physically removed him out of the bar.

After we went out on *one* date, in which I paid for my own meal (because I know it's a typical *nice guy* movie to insist that I would owe him) he wrote a lengthy and detailed post about me on one of those stupid secrets/confessions Facebook pages that were all the rage at colleges a couple years ago.

In this post, which all my friends immediately knew was about me just from reading it, he basically insisted that I wronged him because I did not kiss him on the first date and talked about my personal sex life because he apparently wanted us to lose our virginities to one another. It was basically a passive aggressive way of saying "f**k you for not liking me, you're still a virgin while *I* went out and f****d someone". Literally I never did anything to this guy. We went out on one date and he refused to ever speak to me again or give me the time of day, even though all I tried to do was co-exist peacefully in our vaguely mutual friend group.

Fast forward 6 months later, and after *months* of not even speaking to me, he left a hand written note under my door confessing that he loved me at first site and that he would prefer that I not contact him. I don't think I had ever initiated contact in months at that point?? To this day I don't know how he knew my dorm room number.

Now this same guy apparently owns a gun and has a habit of leaving dead possums on his old roommate's (the girl who introduced us, actually) car.