This one is for you if you're one with an odd sense of humor and don't mind an occasional funny dark joke. Once again, the internet has proved that it's a hella confusing place where one can find literally anything. Panicking about what to do if there's a deer in your car? Well, Google has an answer prepared for you. Ever wondered what to do if a dolphin wanted to mate with you? There's an entire thread dedicated to it. Looking for creepy, weird jokes for whoever-knows-what reasons? You know what? Keep the reasons to yourself, there you go; there's plenty.
We Pandas were today years old when we realized that the subgenre of bizarre and creepy jokes exists. Uncomfortable, making one's skin crawl-kinda creepy. Similar to dark humor jokes, not everyone will find them funny. And those who do perhaps have some unresolved childhood trauma, a bizarre sense of humor, or thick skin. Either of the three (preferably not the first one). Either way, a sense of humor is like taste in music - everyone has their own preference, and it's not our place to judge. So if you're one with a crippling sense of humor and enjoy funny dark jokes, let us assure you that you will also love the ones we've prepared for you.
Below, we've collected and assembled in one place some of the most unconventional yet funny creepy jokes that the internet has to offer. Dark, eerie, unsettling, and what did I just read-kinda humor is hot and ready to be served. Read a creepy dark joke that made you let out an unintentional giggle or crack a smile? Let us know which one it was!
#1
I used to love building sandcastles with my granny... But my parents thought it was creepy so they glued the urn shut.
unknown
Report62points
#2
My parents raised me as an only child, which really irritated my brother.
unknown
Report49points
#3
A father and his young son are walking deep in the woods at night with a lantern and a shovel.
The son says, "Dad it's creepy out here, I'm scared".
The father replies, "You're scared? I'm the one who has to walk back alone!".
The son says, "Dad it's creepy out here, I'm scared".
The father replies, "You're scared? I'm the one who has to walk back alone!".
unknown
Report44points
#4
My wife and I have made a difficult choice and have decided we do not want children.
If anybody does, please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.
If anybody does, please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.
unknown
Report43points
#5
What does a creepy Pokemon do while you're in the shower?
Pikachu.
Pikachu.
unknown
Report39points
#6
I visited my friend at his new house. He told me to make myself at home.
So I threw him out. I hate having visitors.
So I threw him out. I hate having visitors.
unknown
Report39points
#7
A creepy guy walks up to another man in a park. Creepy guy leans close to the man and whispers "Do you have any naked photos of your wife?". The man angrily says "Certainly not!". Creepy guy says "Would you like to buy some?"
unknown
Report38points
#8
My elderly relatives liked to tease me at weddings, saying, “You’ll be next!”
They stopped once I started doing the same to them at funerals.
They stopped once I started doing the same to them at funerals.
unknown
Report38points
#9
What's the best thing you can do if you're feeling lonely?
Watch a scary movie. You won't feel lonely anymore.
Watch a scary movie. You won't feel lonely anymore.
unknown
Report37points
#10
What’s the last thing to go through a fly’s head as it hits the windshield of a car going 70 miles per hour?
Its butt.
Its butt.
unknown
Report34points
#11
My girlfriend thinks I'm creepy. Well, she's not my girlfriend yet.
unknown
Report33points
#12
If at first you don’t succeed… Then skydiving definitely isn’t for you.
unknown
Report33points
#13
I was shocked when I found out my toaster was not waterproof.
unknown
Report33points
#14
My husband is mad that I have no sense of direction.
So I packed up my stuff and right.
So I packed up my stuff and right.
unknown
Report32points
#15
Dance like no one's watching!
Just be careful of the creepy guy in the corner with the video camera who hasn't moved all night.
Just be careful of the creepy guy in the corner with the video camera who hasn't moved all night.
unknown
Report31points
#16
Doctor: “I have good and bad news.”
Patient: “Give me the good news first.”
Doctor: “Your test results are back and you have only two days to live.”
Patient: “That’s the good news? What’s the bad news?”
Doctor: “I’ve been trying to reach you for two days.”
Patient: “Give me the good news first.”
Doctor: “Your test results are back and you have only two days to live.”
Patient: “That’s the good news? What’s the bad news?”
Doctor: “I’ve been trying to reach you for two days.”
unknown
Report30points
#17
I told my girlfriend to stop pretending to be thirteen because it's creepy and pointless.
She'll be thirteen next month anyways.
She'll be thirteen next month anyways.
unknown
Report29points
#18
"Barely legal".
Because "almost underage" sounds a bit creepy.
Because "almost underage" sounds a bit creepy.
unknown
Report28points
#19
Guess what I found in the creepy old professors closet?
Narnia business.
Narnia business.
unknown
Report27points
#20
I threw a boomerang a few years ago.
I now live in constant fear.
I now live in constant fear.
unknown
Report27points