Try making a list of your ten favorite comedies! Already made up? Now please tell me, how many of them are in one way or another dedicated to a wedding theme, or is tying the knot a keystone for the plot? Well, I can almost guarantee that there are at least one or two similar movies in your top ten.
And do you know why? Because any wedding is an almost inexhaustible source of incredible funny, cringy or simply weird stories. About how someone got drunk, got into a fight with someone else - or even one of the newlyweds-to-be literally fled right from the altar. So please feel free to read yet another selection of crazy wedding stories carefully collected for you by Bored Panda!
More info: Quora
#1
My brother was getting married and wanted my son, 3 years-old at the time, to bring him the rings at the altar. I spent days before the wedding repeating to my son: “When I tell you, you go directly to your uncle and you give the rings ONLY TO HIM!”
My brother signals to me, and off goes my son direct to the altar with the cushion and the rings. I am proud of him! But the priest interferes: “Please give the rings to me, my child, I will bless them”. And my son screams in an offended voice: “No! No! I give them to Uncle Peter!!” Big laugh from the attendance.
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114points
#2
DM - dear mum
Also my dm turned up to my wedding in the most enormous hat on the planet. Apparently the House of Fraser personal shopper had told her that if she wore a big hat it would make her look slimmer. She took that advice to heart and wore a hat so big you can’t who she is in any of the photos. She just looks like a hat with legs.
Also my dm turned up to my wedding in the most enormous hat on the planet. Apparently the House of Fraser personal shopper had told her that if she wore a big hat it would make her look slimmer. She took that advice to heart and wore a hat so big you can’t who she is in any of the photos. She just looks like a hat with legs.
90points
#3
This is a true story I swear on a stack of bibles. My baby sister was about to marry a tall Texas cowboy Marine officer who had just also graduated from THE University of Texas. He invited all of his VERY rough cowboy U of T classmates to the wedding as Best man and Groom’s Man. So far so good. The day of the Wedding my baby sister calls me to ask a special favor. Meet her to be husband at a local Conoco gas station with my “handy dandy” toolbox No questions asked right away. OK Can do ! When I get there, I am in a 3 piece suit with a 50 lb. toolbox and Bill is already wearing his immaculately clean officer’s parade dress uniform. What he tells me next really blows my mind. He wants me to hack-saw off a Masterlock combination padlock that his buddies had secured around the narrow part of his scrotum the night before at his bachelor party after he passed out from being snot-sling drunk. The two of us went into the bathroom with the toolbox and stayed there a good while. I wondered what the owners thought about that? Bill was a real tough guy and held “everything” still as best he could with two hands. Unfortunately, I only had an old rust chipped saw blade that skipped frequently. I did saw it off in time. The things you do for your little sister !!!! ( I must say my sister was going to get a fine specimen of a man who could win a blue ribbon at a county fair on any August day. I was tempted to ask him if he was going to treat my sister ‘right”).
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71points
We have already written - and more than once - that there are several main reasons why weddings generate tons of awkward content. The first is alcohol. The second is alcohol... sorry, the crowdedness of wedding audiences, where people with completely different, and often diametrically opposed, viewpoints and manners meet at the same table. The third is alcohol... or, better, nervous tension, because a wedding is a big day, and it should be remembered forever. So it is remembered - but not always in a good way...
#4
I caught the groom giving the best man a BJ, he was just about to finish when I walked in on them, let’s just say the best man could not stop and the groom turned to look at me. Why they didn’t lock the door is beyond me. I did not know them but I was a friend of one of the bridesmaids. I didn’t say anything to her, well not on the wedding day anyway. My friend told me that it was common knowledge and the bride was happy about it as long as it didn’t interfere with her marriage. I am fairly sure she would not have been very happy had she had found out it was going on on her wedding day.
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63points
#5
My son was marrying a beautiful girl, beautiful inside and out. But her parents were a mess. She was oldest, and parents would disappear seperately for days, leaving her with 2 younger siblings, no food in the house. She is remarkably well adjusted.
Anyway somewhere between my son and her, her parents split up. Dad got into motorcycles, his friend introduced him to the woman that broke up her parents marriage.
She wasn't going to let her dad come to the wedding, or walk her down the aisle. We convinced her to open her heart and allow him to come to the wedding and walk her down the aisle. Her condition, his current wife, the one that ruined her parents marriage couldn't be there.
Shortly before the ceremony was to begin, she found out that this man who introduced that woman to her dad was in the church, uninvited. She said she wasn't coming out if he was there. Her grandmother asked me to deal with it, please.
I said I would. I'm a peaceable man, and I really didn't want to see a fight break out in the church before the wrdding mass. Taking a cue from Gulf War 1, I got my 2 older brothers, my nephew (a physically big guy who could rumble) another nephew, and my youngest son ( a big 6′3″ guy)
They wete lined up behind me when I approached this man and his wife. I explained he was an uninvited guest, he retorted the brides father invited him. I explained the couple didn't invite him to the wedding and the bride would like for him to leave
I'm 6′ tall, this guy abour 5′6″ or less. He steps into the aisle and bows up like he is going to to take me on. I snoryed a quiet laugh, and he realized I had brought overwhelming force. He grabbed his wife and left.
The wedding went off without a hitch, they are still happily married more than 10 years.
Yes, to me it was very strange.
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60points
#6
It was a cold day in November, in Northern Ontario, Canada. The Motel (only thing close to the venue) was old but clean.
At the end of the evening, we returned to a cold room. I turned up the thermostat, we loaded all of the gifts on the second bed in the room, and went to sleep. Had a wake up call early to catch our flight for the honeymoon.
I was dreaming that I was choking, and when rolling over, realized that I was coughing. Awoke, and the whole room was foggy. Once my eyes adjusted, saw the room was on fire. The bedding from the other bed was caught in the electric wall mounted heat register, and had caught on fire. The wall was ablaze. My husband was sound asleep! One too many celebratory beverages! I dragged him outside, and once he hit the cold air he woke up. We scrambled to retrieve as much as we could, and climbed into the car. No one at the hotel desk, so we knocked on doors, to try to alert people about the fire, and my husband was using the ice bucket and garbage pail to try to put out the flames. A few other people joined him, and eventually, they put out the fire.
I often wondered what might have been had I not woken up. Throat was sore, had a cough for a few days. Motel closed up afterwards, went out of business. We had been in contact about the experience, trying to see if we could recoupe some of the costs. Lost most of the wedding gifts, cards and money up in flames, along with the wedding dress! They they may have been afraid of a potential law suit, It was quite an adventure. Made for a good story!
How was the wedding night…? Smoking hot!
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60points
Perhaps the whole point is that the groomsmen and bridesmaids, whose role was originally conceived as a kind of wedding troubleshooters, now often themselves become generators of all sorts of problems and comic situations - both during the ceremony and before it. There is always room for a laudable exception - like this bride, who had no idea how many problems the MOH and the bridesmaids saved her “perfect wedding” from, but often those who should be the first line of defense against troubles do provoke these troubles themselves.
#7
Oh dear, this wedding was an absolute [disaster]. Let’s tell it from the beginning. The wedding was for a work friend of mine. The wedding looked like it was going to be great! We received very fancy letters in the mail that invited me and my children. We were ecstatic. We arrived at the wedding right on time, everyone was dressed nice and the venue was beautiful, it looked as though it must have costed a small fortune to put together. But as the bride walked down the isle by herself, her dress busted. The buttons popped and, to make it worse, her makeup was running from how much she was crying. Apparently her dad had bailed and made her walk the isle by herself, then her dress fell apart. A few minutes later she came back out, her dress stitched up and went up to the alter. Her soon to-be husband followed, but as they were reading their vows, the husband stopped. He admitted he was just about to marry her for the money, then left. HE LEFT HER AT THE ALTER RIGHT THEN! Everyone was asked to file out as so many people were crying and yelling, it was chaos.
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53points
#8
A cousin was getting married. They were young, the girl was 17 and pregnant, and my cousin was only a year older if that. But they were nice kids. I take that back. The bride was a very nice girl. My cousin was a lazy jerk. Still, family, you know?
The bride was Catholic and the wedding was going to be in her church. My family wasn’t Catholic, with the exception of my uncle’s wife. Aunt Mary telephoned the bride the night before the wedding, to welcome her to the family and to express Catholic solidarity. She tried to make the girl feel welcome, started talking to her about the wedding preparations and then asked the seemingly innocuous question, what does your dress look like?
According to people who heard Mary’s end of the conversation, Mary then totally went off on the girl. What? How DARE you wear a white dress to a Catholic wedding when you’re pregnant! How DARE you desecrate the Host like that. I understand she left the poor girl in tears.
So the next day we went to the wedding, then across the street to the Knights of Columbus hall for the reception. It was quite a blowout, with a live band and a cash bar. The bride looked radiant. The groom looked stoned.
I was hoping there weren’t going to be any more scenes from Aunt Mary. There weren’t. But then my Aunt Dorothy, my mother’s sister, walked up to the bar, waited until there was a pause in the music, and started shouting at the bartender. “How DARE you serve alcohol at a teenage wedding? If it wasn’t for people like you she would have never gotten KNOCKED UP in the first place!”
A little later I went up to the girl and apologized for my whole family. The marriage, such as it was, lasted six months. She had the baby, moved back in with her parents, and filed for divorce.
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52points
#9
My mum rearranged our seating plan on the morning of our wedding-which we didn't realise until we sat down for the meal and instead of being able to see at the nearer tables the family we loved and the friends we wanted, we were faced with two tables of my mums friends, (including one of their husbands who was a pervert and whom
She was aware had made me very uncomfortable all my life), and most of whom we didn't know.
She had managed in doing so to additionally seat one of her friends who is a vile racist in very close proximity to a table full of my colleagues from work, most of whom were from Nigeria or the Carribean and who had shown up looking stunning in their national ceromonial dress. He could loudly be heard referring to them as 'bongo ladies' throughout the meal.
Apparently she wanted her friends to have a better view Hmm
She was aware had made me very uncomfortable all my life), and most of whom we didn't know.
She had managed in doing so to additionally seat one of her friends who is a vile racist in very close proximity to a table full of my colleagues from work, most of whom were from Nigeria or the Carribean and who had shown up looking stunning in their national ceromonial dress. He could loudly be heard referring to them as 'bongo ladies' throughout the meal.
Apparently she wanted her friends to have a better view Hmm
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50points
"Some of what happens at weddings is bad luck," Stephen J. Betchen, D.S.W., writes in his dedicated article on Psychology Today. "A client told me that her uncle suffered a heart attack and died on the dance floor. She said he was in great shape, and that the incident was a total shock to all family members. Of course, he wasn't healthy, but he might not have known what was to fall him."
"While we cannot control everything in our lives, most wedding mishaps seem psychotically induced by the nature of the event itself. And it's not just a future 'mother-in-law' who is to blame… although it certainly can be..."
#10
At my brother’s second wedding (out of 4), the bride’s grandmother collapsed and [passed away] right in the church during picture taking. Later, a hurricane hit while they were in the Caribbean for their honeymoon. Signs of things to come for sure!
47points
#11
Well my husband left my wedding to go buy some “feel goods" for him and his friends. My maid of honour left early and I was stuck to fix my own dress after toilet breaks. I didn't have one bite of my own wedding cake. I didn't get a dance with my father. My husband was too high to make out that night (when he got back from his pick up trip) His friends bombarded our room the next morning at 7am. No privacy.. anyways nothing too spectacular. Probably part of my reasons leaving him….
45points
#12
My mother (nc now)
Showed everyone the label in my dress that said extra large and took the piss.
Showed everyone my dress before I wore it.
Told my (now ex) husband that I was a slag and he would be better off with her.
Deliberately deleted the wedding video.
Wore the same colour as me 'accidently'.
Cancelled my DJ and got her mate instead.
Gave a cringe inducing speech including information I didn't want my ex husbands family to know.
Started grinding all over a guy that she was obsessed with, to the point he went home.
And so so much more.
My ex MIL just didn't speak to me as she thought I was a gold digger, there was no hold to be dug anyways Grin
I wouldn't get married again.
43points
Well, be that as it may, literally anything can become the cause of a wedding mishap. From an annoying guest who for some reason decided to be present in every wedding photo, to an overly flashy server's outfit, which makes the bride decide that the poor girl wanted to outshine her... And thousands, thousands of other reasons.
This collection contains over three dozen stories, so please feel free to read them all, crack up at some of them, and maybe add your own in the comments below. After all, if you have a funny tale in your memory, why not share it with others?
#13
Best man was so drunk he fell over while doing his speech (which had been incoherent up until then anyway). Bride and groom had a screaming row about it at the top table. Groom stormed off in tears with the best man and disappeared for over an hour and a half. Mother of the bride wouldn't let the food be served until he came back so we were all starving and by the time we got it, it was cold and congealed. Groom later vomited red wine onto bride's dress. Father of the groom got absolutely wasted, pulled his trousers and underwear down (in front of children) and had to be carried out whilst urinating. All in all it was a disaster and I felt very sorry for the bride.
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41points
#14
DH - dear husband
DM - dear mum
My dm is very traditional and really wanted invitations to be rsvp’d to her. We sent out invites to approx 150, judging cost on about 100. A lot of dh’s family and friends are in Australia so obviously wouldn’t be coming but we felt we had to invite anyway. It turned out my dm has decided that no one wanted to come to our wedding and we’d be devastated that so many people didn’t want to see us marry. So, for every decline we got dm invited one of her mates. It was £150 a head and I only knew about half the people at my wedding in the end! My wedding photos are full of ‘Angela who dm used to work with’ and ‘Nigel from dm’s swimming club’. It also meant dh was actually a bit upset on the day as he thought some of his friends had made the effort to come from Australia, only to find out it was actually it was just my mums pub quiz team.
DM - dear mum
My dm is very traditional and really wanted invitations to be rsvp’d to her. We sent out invites to approx 150, judging cost on about 100. A lot of dh’s family and friends are in Australia so obviously wouldn’t be coming but we felt we had to invite anyway. It turned out my dm has decided that no one wanted to come to our wedding and we’d be devastated that so many people didn’t want to see us marry. So, for every decline we got dm invited one of her mates. It was £150 a head and I only knew about half the people at my wedding in the end! My wedding photos are full of ‘Angela who dm used to work with’ and ‘Nigel from dm’s swimming club’. It also meant dh was actually a bit upset on the day as he thought some of his friends had made the effort to come from Australia, only to find out it was actually it was just my mums pub quiz team.
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36points
#15
I was a bridesmaid for a cousin when I was 17. My aunty's pervert husband kept making inappropriate comments about my cleavage and what he'd do if he was a younger man.
My father was told what was going on, he sneaked up behind him to hear for himself, tapped him on the shoulder and warned him that one more comment would earn him a hiding. The pervert did a drunken bluster and bravado attempt and stepped back to better face my dad which resulted in him doing a back flip over a 1 foot wall with a 6 foot drop the other side.
My father thinks this is far better than a smack in the chops and walks off satisfied it's dealt with*. He did have a hard time explaining the grass stains to his wfe though which was the most entertaining bit of the wedding for me.
*I don't know what happened post wedding but we never saw that particular pervert again although he stayed married to my aunty until her death
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36points
#16
The vicar spent a large proportion of the ceremony discussing the bride's and groom's personal failings in some detail: "...and you, Jennifer, are prone to spending money without thinking of the consequences, a habit you will have to rein in. You once spent nearly £100 on a pair of shoes which didn't fit! Of course, we all know James has an eye for the ladies and for his part he must learn to behave more modestly if he expects to keep you." On and on he went.
It wasn't remotely funny or endearing, just cringeworthy. The bride and groom looked like they were ready to cry.
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32points
#17
I got locked in restroom 😂😂.
So it happened some 20 years ago and I was a kid at that time. It was my aunt's marriage and at that time marriages used to happen in normal halls like not very lavish ones.
As usual we kids were engrossed in eating and playing. Aunts were busy in showing off their new dresses and uncles were taking care of arrangements and guests. Suddenly I got an urge to pee and I rushed to washroom. Door of washroom was very old kind of where latch will be there on top corner and we have to push from bottom. I was in hurry so I jumped and pushed the latch. After I was done and got up to open the latch suddenly I felt my height is reduced 🤐🤐.
I am unable to open the door. I jumped multiple times but everytime it was a failure. I jumped, jumped and jumped but all in vain.. I was drenched in sweat and almost crying.
Suddenly what I hear.. yeah jump jump good . What I see is there was a ventilator and from there two uncles were seeing and encouraging me that I can open the door. This didn't make me happy but I got scared that they were seeing me 🤣🤣.
I bent down to hide myself haha… they tried to make me understand that they were there to help me. After all these struggles they broke the door and when I went out everyone was gathered to see who is the kid but I was searching for my parents. They had no idea where their poor kid is..
I came out like a warrior trying my best not to cry 😂🤣.
Story doesn't end here.. after I reached in my family group my mother was telling to someone..
“Pta nahi kisi ka baccha bathroom me lock ho gya tha , kaise parents hai baccho ko akele bhej dete hai bathroom me”
Translation: “I heard that someone's kid got locked in restroom. What kind of parents send their kid alone to washroom”
Before I could say anything, my cousin came and narrated the whole incident . Needless to say everyone had a good laugh but mommy was seeing me with helpless eyes :-)
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31points
#18
At the reception of my cousin’s wedding, the groom was making his speech. He finished with: “… it's my birthday in December and, just so you know, I like a nice drop of Scotch.”
My four year old son piped up: “And I like a nice drop of Blue Nun!”
Everyone collapsed into laughter. I was mortified! Apparently, it's all still on the video.
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29points
#19
I went to one where the Milwaukee Brewers’ racing sausages showed up and danced with everyone. I was 7 months pregnant, dancing with the bratwurst.
Another one, literally everyone over 13 was drunk as a skunk, and during “Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy” a dude took off his shirt and got down on all fours and started trotting around the dance floor like a horse, complete with bucking. Then this girl hopped on his back and he literally gave her a horsey ride until she fell off. Upon which the bride’s 400-ish pound father hopped on dude’s back, and dude KEPT GOING.
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27points
#20
Worst thing that happened at my wedding, is when the pastor that was suppose to marry us didnt show, had to call another church to send a pastor to perform the ceremony. After guests, waiting for an hour for the ceremony to begin, we proceeded with the vows. The pastor only got two sentences out and the best man (groom’s brother) started to have an epileptic seizure. The groom left and came back with a vase full of algae water, threw it on his brother, than propped him in a chair and we said our I do’s (maybe 3 minutes) and kissed. Groom escorted his brother to the back, and I walked down the aisle alone, to greet guests as they were leaving. Should have taken this as an omen, we were divorced 10 years later.
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26points